life sucks ass...
gods...i must be bipolar or something... was ok earlier...
damnit. i hate it when my little bubble of ignorance is popped. but then again, that whole blissful thing can only last so long. so i guess i'll just get over it. maybe not though...
emailed my mom again. she still hasn't replyed to the first one. i really hate it when she does this to me. gets my hopes up, just to let them crash back down again. *snorts* she's been doing it for so long, she could possibly be the cruelest woman i've ever met.
christ. is there a reason why i -still- fucking love her? i've got a new mom now damnit, and i love this woman because she actually somewhat understands my pain. so why the obsessiveness with the god damned egg-donar? hell, why do i even care anymore?
there's too much bull-shit in the world, there really is. here i sit bitching about my biological mother, when there's people out there that have gone through worse than i have. and still go through it. and will go through it. why should i try to live if all i'm doing is living to die? why draw, why write, why -create- at fucking all if it's not going to do anything?
i feel like cattle. it's a lovely feeling, you should try it some time. is there a point to all this worthless bull-shit? or were we just put down here to entertain some sick ass psychotic sadist freak from hell? *snorts* any lift-ups are welcome. if you care to try...
damnit. i hate it when my little bubble of ignorance is popped. but then again, that whole blissful thing can only last so long. so i guess i'll just get over it. maybe not though...
emailed my mom again. she still hasn't replyed to the first one. i really hate it when she does this to me. gets my hopes up, just to let them crash back down again. *snorts* she's been doing it for so long, she could possibly be the cruelest woman i've ever met.
christ. is there a reason why i -still- fucking love her? i've got a new mom now damnit, and i love this woman because she actually somewhat understands my pain. so why the obsessiveness with the god damned egg-donar? hell, why do i even care anymore?
there's too much bull-shit in the world, there really is. here i sit bitching about my biological mother, when there's people out there that have gone through worse than i have. and still go through it. and will go through it. why should i try to live if all i'm doing is living to die? why draw, why write, why -create- at fucking all if it's not going to do anything?
i feel like cattle. it's a lovely feeling, you should try it some time. is there a point to all this worthless bull-shit? or were we just put down here to entertain some sick ass psychotic sadist freak from hell? *snorts* any lift-ups are welcome. if you care to try...