[SC31] Flawless Reflection
Rating: PG
Pairing: Kangteuk
Genre: AU!Romance, Drama, Angst
Theme: Cell Phones, Phrase to include: "give me some time"
Summary: Withdrawn from the world, afraid of public perception, unable to face himself as his flaws brutally mock him until it shattered him completely. Yet he sees past it and instead at the person hidden beneath the pieces.
***
Leeteuk heard his cell phone ring and answered it.
"Are you ready to go?"
"...Do we have to?" Leeteuk asked timidly.
"Our classmates would be disappointed if you didn't." He heard a distant knock, walked to the front door and opened it. Kangin entered and closed his phone, Leeteuk following his example.
"I'm going to go change then." Leeteuk walked to the back as Kangin closed the door.
Kangin waited and continued to look his watch, it had been a while. There was no sign of him appearing, he decided to walk to the bedroom door and slowly opened it.
Leeteuk was fidgeting with his scarf as he repeatedly fixed it around his neck, he barely glanced at the mirror but continued to do so.
"We should get going." Leeteuk looked up and gave an uneasy nod.
"Do we have to go?" He asked again, Kangin walked over and gently patted his head.
"I'll be there if you need me." He reassured, Leeteuk gave an apprehensive smile as the two walked out of the apartment and into the cold morning.
--
Leeteuk waited in an empty classroom, casually pacing among the desks until the doors slid open.
"You know they're asking about you." Kangin said as he closed the door behind him. Leeteuk looked down on the floor as he kept walking. Kangin smiled as he walked towards him. "You're still too shy for your own good."
Leeteuk turned around and hit into his chest, he looked away shyly. "I can't help it."
"At least take a few photos-"
"I'd rather not." Leeteuk said quietly, Kangin sighed.
"Let's go then." He nodded as they walked out of the room, however soon enough flashes of light were everywhere. He tried to walk forward but hands pulled him in.
He felt himself hyperventilate, he wanted to get out before it was seen. He needed to get out before someone sees.
Kangin looked back and watched the students huddle in close packs for any camera. Yet his eyes were focused on only one person among the huge crowd, a person who looked beyond uncomfortable as he was dragged from person to person. Even more so when he was frequently asked to remove his coat and scarf, something Leeteuk refused each time despite the heat. With each flash he looked more and more uneasy by the constant flashes.
Kangin took a deep breath and reached for his hand, Leeteuk eagerly reached for it and allowed himself to be pulled away. "Can we go now?" He asked hopefully, Kangin nodded as they walked through the corridors.
Outside as the cold air strengthened as Leeteuk continued to heightened his scarf, Kangin pulled his sleeve to avoid the people he nearly hit into it. Yet Leeteuk barely looked up and continued to worry over his scarf.
It wasn't until they reached his apartment when Leeteuk had ran back to his bedroom, once he was inside he felt his breathing slowly relax. He hated being outside, there were too many eyes on him, too many eyes who would look on in disgust at what they saw if they knew.
He hesitated as he removed his coat and placed it on the bed, he dared not to look back as he pulled off his shirt. As he pulled away his scarf, his eye betrayed him as he looked back at the mirror.
The beginning of the scar was evident on one side of his neck as it trailed down his shoulder and the side of his arm. It was ugly, discolored, and absolutely repulsive, he tried to turn away but the mirror continued to mock his distorted self. He couldn't take it as he slammed his fists into it.
He couldn't stand his own reflection.
Blood trickled down from his fists as his legs buckled and collapsed onto the ground, the scarf had fallen into the shard covered floor. He heard the door opened and didn't react as he felt his quivering self being pulled up. When he felt a hand on his shoulder, he instantly pulled away.
He widened his eyes, he hadn't meant to. "I'm sorry-"
"It's fine." Kangin reassured as he reached for him again, being careful not to touch his scar. He helped him up and lowered him onto his bed. Leeteuk purposely faced away, hiding his disfigured side of him. Kangin left the room momentarily and returned as he sat beside him, he took Leeteuk's hands and began to disinfect the cuts. Leeteuk hid his eyes under his hair, ashamed of what he had done.
When Kangin had finished bandaging his hands, he looked up at him and slowly held out his hand towards him, his fingers barely touching his neck.
Leeteuk flinched away from his touch, his eyes closed from fear. "Please." Leeteuk begged. "Don't."
Kangin however gently brush his fingers against the scars on his neck, he made no reaction against the rugged and uneven skin. He leaned in and stated quietly. "Don't ever be ashamed." Leeteuk didn't open his eyes as Kangin placed a kiss on his scar covered shoulder.
Leeteuk opened his eyes at met his kind ones. "You're... too good to me." Leeteuk murmured. "You're too nice to me... You don't have to be here."
"Why wouldn't I be?" He asked.
Leeteuk broke the eye contact. "Because I look like this." He answered simply.
Kangin offered a comforting smile. "I hope you don't think the way I feel about you is truly that shallow." He then traced from edges that met with his smooth skin, laying his hand on his cheek.
Leeteuk shook his head as Kangin enveloped his arms around him, Leeteuk involuntarily pushed away but Kangin's strength persisted. He rested his head against his shoulder, a comfortable silence ensuring when the phone rang.
Leeteuk lightly shoved him away, "It's fine." Kangin delicately let go and reached for the phone.
Kangin sighed as he closed his phone. "They need me at work."
Leeteuk nodded, he noted Kangin's worried look and sighed. "I'm fine now, you can go."
"Come by later." He said, Leeteuk subtly nodded as he got up and walked carefully over the shards stained floor out of the room. Kangin heard the sound of water running and sighed. He got up and walked out the bedroom, he took a last look at the shattered mirror before closing the door.
--
"Kangin!"
Kangin looked up at a concerned Kibum. "Yes?"
"You haven't been answering the past ten times I called you." Kangin apologized as he cleaned the tables. Kibum sighed. "It's about him again isn't it?"
Kangin breathed. "I don't like leaving him alone."
"You were already overprotective of him before it happened." Kibum scratched the back of his head. "This must be killing you."
Kangin paused his hand as he looked down at the table. "His confidence was never that high even before, it was always a weakness of his. But now that this happened, whatever he had left is completely shattered." Kangin lowered his head. "I'm worried that I might lose him completely."
He remembered Leeteuk as quite shy, never once initiating something because he feared rejection. He even remembered the day he confessed, Leeteuk had looked at him with wide eyes, he had asked why he was so surprised.
"It's because... I-I like you... And I never thought you would like me back."
He felt a pair of arms around him, to his surprise it was Kibum. "It'll be fine." He patted his back as he pulled away. "It's a good thing he has you around."
Kangin gave a weak smile. "Thanks."
Kibum nodded and then smacked him on his back. "Now back to work before we both get an earful from the boss." Kangin chuckled and nodded, he then glanced up at the clock of the cafe. He walked to the glass counter and started cleaning when he paused over the strawberry cake.
He smiled at the memory when he first asked Leeteuk to come by, he had looked back at the doors and watched him nervously debate between opening and closing the door when Kangin walked over and opened the door for him. Ushering in the still timid Leeteuk, he offered him any piece he wanted, Leeteuk rejected his offer but he noted how he continually glanced at that cake. And when he took upon himself to give him a slice, Leeteuk looked up and gratefully took it, unmasking his composed expression as it revealed a mesmerizing dimpled smile.
He looked up and nodded that he'd be by soon.
However as the hours passed and the sun began to set, he started to grow restless as he kept looking out the window, hoping that he'd soon show up. But even then he didn't appear, his heart clenched as he remembered the last time Leeteuk didn't arrive by his job.
It was the memories he'd rather forget, the day he had walked into that hospital room and relieved to see him alive. Yet as he reached for him, Leeteuk immediately pulled back into a corner, covering his tear-stricken face.
"Don't look at me."
Immediately concerned, he clocked out for his break and quickly pressed Leeteuk's number and waited. The rings seemed to last forever when he finally answered.
"Hello?"
"Are you okay?" Kangin asked into the phone.
"Yes."
"Then why didn't you come by? I thought something-" He stopped himself as he gulped slightly, he didn't need to remind him.
"It's nothing, I was busy with some last minute school work that I lost track of time."
Kangin heaved a sigh of relief. "That's good, then come by and-"
"I can't." Leeteuk interjected. "I'll be out for a while." Kangin furrowed his eyebrows.
"Where do you need to go?"
"...I don't have to tell you everything." Leeteuk murmured, Kangin shook his head.
"Give me some time and I'll be right over-"
"Kangin." He said sternly. "I'm fine, you don't need to come over." With that he hung up and Kangin was left to a dial tone. He closed it and quickly rushed over to his manager and past Kibum who asked him what was wrong. With a quick apology to both he rushed out of the cafe and ran to the apartment. He knew it was a lie that Leeteuk was going out, aside from school and coming by his job, he never once left the apartment for other reasons.
He knocked on the door but there was no answer. "Open the door." He continued to knock. "I'm not going away even if you ignore me." Even then no answer, Kangin took a deep breath as he used his body and slammed the door open. He hurried over to the bedroom and opened the door and to his relief was Leeteuk. He was wearing his a long sleeve shirt over his jeans, as if he was ready to go out soon, a different scarf around his neck as he simply laid on his bed with his arms over his eyes.
Kangin sat on the bed beside him, he ran his fingers through his hair. "You're okay." He smiled gratefully.
"I told you I was fine." Leeteuk said, his voice raspy.
"Why didn't you come by then?" He asked.
Minutes passed before Leeteuk answered. "I did come by."
Kangin gave a slanted look. "Then why didn't you come in?"
"...I saw you with that co-worker of yours." Leeteuk murmured.
Kangin then realized who he meant. "You mean Kibum?" He shook his head. "And what? Thought we were a great match?" Kangin laughed lightly at the thought. However, Leeteuk remained quiet and turned on his side away from him, Kangin then realized what had truly bothered him. "Leeteuk, you know I would never-"
"I know," Leeteuk said softly. "But I can't help but think that one day that you'll... That you'll find someone else."
Kangin laid down beside him and pulled him against him, Leeteuk didn't react. "That won't happen."
"Because you'll fight it." Leeteuk reasoned. "You feel sorry for me, enough that even if you fell for someone else, you would force yourself to stay with me."
Kangin lowered his eyes. "I wouldn't-"
"Don't say you won't." Leeteuk said firmly, his voice however said otherwise. It was broken and afraid that one day that future will truly happen, the day Kangin would abandon him.
"Do you remember what I asked you before?" Kangin asked, he didn't answer. "I asked you if you would move in with me-"
"I remember." Leeteuk answered quietly.
Kangin shifted slightly. "That question hasn't been answered yet." Leeteuk stiffened.
"You only want me there so you can keep a better eye on me." He accused.
"No," Kangin interrupted. "I mean- Maybe partly, but that's not the full reason." A short silence ensued.
"...Why would you want me to move in?" He asked.
Kangin smiled. "Because you're the first person I want to see when I open my eyes." He felt Leeteuk turn around, they were now face to face.
"You want to see a disfigured person?" He asked in disbelief.
Kangin shook his head. "You're not disfigured-"
"Don't lie."
"You're not disfigured." Kangin stated. Leeteuk looked away from his eyes.
"You must be blind." He murmured, Kangin affectionately brushed the hair away from his eyes. Leeteuk closed his eyes as Kangin enveloped him in his arms. Cradling the withdrawn man, as if at any moment he would break.
He carefully moved the scarf as it revealed his scarred neck, Leeteuk flinched but allowed him. He placed his hand on his neck and brushed his lips against his. Leeteuk opened his eyes and pulled back enough to see his own reflection in Kangin's eyes.
All he saw were his flaws.
"You don't want an imperfection like me." Leeteuk uttered, Kangin shook his head as he cupped his face.
"You can believe that I don't see it or choose not to." He gently caressed his cheek with this fingers. "But it hasn't changed how much I feel about you."
He wiped a single tear that fell from Leeteuk's reddened eyes. They both closed their eyes as their lips barely touched. "I love you." He declared as he kissed him fully on the lips.
When morning came, Kangin slowly opened his eyes, his vision slowly forming as he recognized where he was and the person he was holding. He smiled when he felt his phone vibrate, he sighed knowing this meant he had to go to work. He carefully moved him away from Leeteuk's grasp and left the room.
Leeteuk stirred slightly as he woke up, he felt a slight chill as the warmth was now gone. He reached his hand and felt around, he opened his eyes and saw nothing. He jumped up and looked around, his eyes searching for him when he gulped slightly. His insecurity brutally taunting him.
He had really left.
He felt himself shake as he lowered his head onto his knees. The door creaked opened and he looked up with watered eyes. He rushed from the bed and embraced Kangin as his hands clung to his shirt. Kangin held him protectively and whispered assurances, rubbing his back as he soothe him until his shaking stopped.
His phone rang again and Kangin cursed mentally at the wretched device. "I'm sorry, I'll-"
Leeteuk stopped his hand and gave him a miserably forced smile. "It's fine... go to work." He walked away and returned to his bed, covering himself with the sheets.
Kangin breathed in as he nodded. "Come by later." He said as he opened the door, Leeteuk made no reply. "And please... think about what I asked you." With that he closed the door.
Leeteuk kept his eyes open as he stayed inside the covers, pondering when his own cell phone rang. He pulled the covers off and reached for his cell phone on the table beside. He opened it.
"Have you thought about it?" Kangin asked.
Leeteuk smiled shyly. "Give me some time to think about it." A few seconds passed.
"It's enough time right?" Leeteuk chuckled as he laid back into the covers.
"You're impatient." He stated as he closed his eyes.
"I can't help it," Kangin replied. "I've always wanted it... And this morning proved to me that I still want this." Leeteuk buried himself within the covers, remembering the warmth that engulfed him.
He wanted it too.
"Kangin," He called softly. "I'll move in with you." A silence ensued. "Kangin?"
"Do you realized how long I waited for that answer?" Leeteuk smiled. "Later on today, I'll be by to start moving your things-"
"I just made my decision." Leeteuk murmured.
"And lets not waste another day." Leeteuk chuckled. "Ah, the boss is calling me, I'll be by later."
"Okay." They said their goodbyes as he closed the phone and curled up in the bed covers.
The wall across him that encased the mirror had only a few pieces left. In its remnants, reflect a resting man on the bed, revealing a perfect dimpled smile.
- ❄ Challenge 30 ❄ | ❄ Finish ❄ -
--
A/N: This is now the completed Suju 31-Shots List ~! :)
Easily one of the hardest I had to write, not that the prompt itself was, but mostly because I wanted to test myself. Along with the challenges, I tried to test myself in other areas as well, and for some reason I've been in a angstish mood lately....
On a lighter note, 31 days went by pretty quickly, this was definitely fun to do and I thank my prompter :D and my sometimes unwilling beta (unless its kangteuk) but they definitely had a huge part in this ^^. I'll miss the challenges, some came by easier than others. A few questionable ones that had me nearly banging my head to think of something @.@ but even then, once something clicked I just loved it. Once I finish my other projects, will definitely consider doing it again ^^.
❄ Happy Holidays and Happy New Year's Eve/Day! :D ❄
Pairing: Kangteuk
Genre: AU!Romance, Drama, Angst
Theme: Cell Phones, Phrase to include: "give me some time"
Summary: Withdrawn from the world, afraid of public perception, unable to face himself as his flaws brutally mock him until it shattered him completely. Yet he sees past it and instead at the person hidden beneath the pieces.
***
Leeteuk heard his cell phone ring and answered it.
"Are you ready to go?"
"...Do we have to?" Leeteuk asked timidly.
"Our classmates would be disappointed if you didn't." He heard a distant knock, walked to the front door and opened it. Kangin entered and closed his phone, Leeteuk following his example.
"I'm going to go change then." Leeteuk walked to the back as Kangin closed the door.
Kangin waited and continued to look his watch, it had been a while. There was no sign of him appearing, he decided to walk to the bedroom door and slowly opened it.
Leeteuk was fidgeting with his scarf as he repeatedly fixed it around his neck, he barely glanced at the mirror but continued to do so.
"We should get going." Leeteuk looked up and gave an uneasy nod.
"Do we have to go?" He asked again, Kangin walked over and gently patted his head.
"I'll be there if you need me." He reassured, Leeteuk gave an apprehensive smile as the two walked out of the apartment and into the cold morning.
--
Leeteuk waited in an empty classroom, casually pacing among the desks until the doors slid open.
"You know they're asking about you." Kangin said as he closed the door behind him. Leeteuk looked down on the floor as he kept walking. Kangin smiled as he walked towards him. "You're still too shy for your own good."
Leeteuk turned around and hit into his chest, he looked away shyly. "I can't help it."
"At least take a few photos-"
"I'd rather not." Leeteuk said quietly, Kangin sighed.
"Let's go then." He nodded as they walked out of the room, however soon enough flashes of light were everywhere. He tried to walk forward but hands pulled him in.
He felt himself hyperventilate, he wanted to get out before it was seen. He needed to get out before someone sees.
Kangin looked back and watched the students huddle in close packs for any camera. Yet his eyes were focused on only one person among the huge crowd, a person who looked beyond uncomfortable as he was dragged from person to person. Even more so when he was frequently asked to remove his coat and scarf, something Leeteuk refused each time despite the heat. With each flash he looked more and more uneasy by the constant flashes.
Kangin took a deep breath and reached for his hand, Leeteuk eagerly reached for it and allowed himself to be pulled away. "Can we go now?" He asked hopefully, Kangin nodded as they walked through the corridors.
Outside as the cold air strengthened as Leeteuk continued to heightened his scarf, Kangin pulled his sleeve to avoid the people he nearly hit into it. Yet Leeteuk barely looked up and continued to worry over his scarf.
It wasn't until they reached his apartment when Leeteuk had ran back to his bedroom, once he was inside he felt his breathing slowly relax. He hated being outside, there were too many eyes on him, too many eyes who would look on in disgust at what they saw if they knew.
He hesitated as he removed his coat and placed it on the bed, he dared not to look back as he pulled off his shirt. As he pulled away his scarf, his eye betrayed him as he looked back at the mirror.
The beginning of the scar was evident on one side of his neck as it trailed down his shoulder and the side of his arm. It was ugly, discolored, and absolutely repulsive, he tried to turn away but the mirror continued to mock his distorted self. He couldn't take it as he slammed his fists into it.
He couldn't stand his own reflection.
Blood trickled down from his fists as his legs buckled and collapsed onto the ground, the scarf had fallen into the shard covered floor. He heard the door opened and didn't react as he felt his quivering self being pulled up. When he felt a hand on his shoulder, he instantly pulled away.
He widened his eyes, he hadn't meant to. "I'm sorry-"
"It's fine." Kangin reassured as he reached for him again, being careful not to touch his scar. He helped him up and lowered him onto his bed. Leeteuk purposely faced away, hiding his disfigured side of him. Kangin left the room momentarily and returned as he sat beside him, he took Leeteuk's hands and began to disinfect the cuts. Leeteuk hid his eyes under his hair, ashamed of what he had done.
When Kangin had finished bandaging his hands, he looked up at him and slowly held out his hand towards him, his fingers barely touching his neck.
Leeteuk flinched away from his touch, his eyes closed from fear. "Please." Leeteuk begged. "Don't."
Kangin however gently brush his fingers against the scars on his neck, he made no reaction against the rugged and uneven skin. He leaned in and stated quietly. "Don't ever be ashamed." Leeteuk didn't open his eyes as Kangin placed a kiss on his scar covered shoulder.
Leeteuk opened his eyes at met his kind ones. "You're... too good to me." Leeteuk murmured. "You're too nice to me... You don't have to be here."
"Why wouldn't I be?" He asked.
Leeteuk broke the eye contact. "Because I look like this." He answered simply.
Kangin offered a comforting smile. "I hope you don't think the way I feel about you is truly that shallow." He then traced from edges that met with his smooth skin, laying his hand on his cheek.
Leeteuk shook his head as Kangin enveloped his arms around him, Leeteuk involuntarily pushed away but Kangin's strength persisted. He rested his head against his shoulder, a comfortable silence ensuring when the phone rang.
Leeteuk lightly shoved him away, "It's fine." Kangin delicately let go and reached for the phone.
Kangin sighed as he closed his phone. "They need me at work."
Leeteuk nodded, he noted Kangin's worried look and sighed. "I'm fine now, you can go."
"Come by later." He said, Leeteuk subtly nodded as he got up and walked carefully over the shards stained floor out of the room. Kangin heard the sound of water running and sighed. He got up and walked out the bedroom, he took a last look at the shattered mirror before closing the door.
--
"Kangin!"
Kangin looked up at a concerned Kibum. "Yes?"
"You haven't been answering the past ten times I called you." Kangin apologized as he cleaned the tables. Kibum sighed. "It's about him again isn't it?"
Kangin breathed. "I don't like leaving him alone."
"You were already overprotective of him before it happened." Kibum scratched the back of his head. "This must be killing you."
Kangin paused his hand as he looked down at the table. "His confidence was never that high even before, it was always a weakness of his. But now that this happened, whatever he had left is completely shattered." Kangin lowered his head. "I'm worried that I might lose him completely."
He remembered Leeteuk as quite shy, never once initiating something because he feared rejection. He even remembered the day he confessed, Leeteuk had looked at him with wide eyes, he had asked why he was so surprised.
"It's because... I-I like you... And I never thought you would like me back."
He felt a pair of arms around him, to his surprise it was Kibum. "It'll be fine." He patted his back as he pulled away. "It's a good thing he has you around."
Kangin gave a weak smile. "Thanks."
Kibum nodded and then smacked him on his back. "Now back to work before we both get an earful from the boss." Kangin chuckled and nodded, he then glanced up at the clock of the cafe. He walked to the glass counter and started cleaning when he paused over the strawberry cake.
He smiled at the memory when he first asked Leeteuk to come by, he had looked back at the doors and watched him nervously debate between opening and closing the door when Kangin walked over and opened the door for him. Ushering in the still timid Leeteuk, he offered him any piece he wanted, Leeteuk rejected his offer but he noted how he continually glanced at that cake. And when he took upon himself to give him a slice, Leeteuk looked up and gratefully took it, unmasking his composed expression as it revealed a mesmerizing dimpled smile.
He looked up and nodded that he'd be by soon.
However as the hours passed and the sun began to set, he started to grow restless as he kept looking out the window, hoping that he'd soon show up. But even then he didn't appear, his heart clenched as he remembered the last time Leeteuk didn't arrive by his job.
It was the memories he'd rather forget, the day he had walked into that hospital room and relieved to see him alive. Yet as he reached for him, Leeteuk immediately pulled back into a corner, covering his tear-stricken face.
"Don't look at me."
Immediately concerned, he clocked out for his break and quickly pressed Leeteuk's number and waited. The rings seemed to last forever when he finally answered.
"Hello?"
"Are you okay?" Kangin asked into the phone.
"Yes."
"Then why didn't you come by? I thought something-" He stopped himself as he gulped slightly, he didn't need to remind him.
"It's nothing, I was busy with some last minute school work that I lost track of time."
Kangin heaved a sigh of relief. "That's good, then come by and-"
"I can't." Leeteuk interjected. "I'll be out for a while." Kangin furrowed his eyebrows.
"Where do you need to go?"
"...I don't have to tell you everything." Leeteuk murmured, Kangin shook his head.
"Give me some time and I'll be right over-"
"Kangin." He said sternly. "I'm fine, you don't need to come over." With that he hung up and Kangin was left to a dial tone. He closed it and quickly rushed over to his manager and past Kibum who asked him what was wrong. With a quick apology to both he rushed out of the cafe and ran to the apartment. He knew it was a lie that Leeteuk was going out, aside from school and coming by his job, he never once left the apartment for other reasons.
He knocked on the door but there was no answer. "Open the door." He continued to knock. "I'm not going away even if you ignore me." Even then no answer, Kangin took a deep breath as he used his body and slammed the door open. He hurried over to the bedroom and opened the door and to his relief was Leeteuk. He was wearing his a long sleeve shirt over his jeans, as if he was ready to go out soon, a different scarf around his neck as he simply laid on his bed with his arms over his eyes.
Kangin sat on the bed beside him, he ran his fingers through his hair. "You're okay." He smiled gratefully.
"I told you I was fine." Leeteuk said, his voice raspy.
"Why didn't you come by then?" He asked.
Minutes passed before Leeteuk answered. "I did come by."
Kangin gave a slanted look. "Then why didn't you come in?"
"...I saw you with that co-worker of yours." Leeteuk murmured.
Kangin then realized who he meant. "You mean Kibum?" He shook his head. "And what? Thought we were a great match?" Kangin laughed lightly at the thought. However, Leeteuk remained quiet and turned on his side away from him, Kangin then realized what had truly bothered him. "Leeteuk, you know I would never-"
"I know," Leeteuk said softly. "But I can't help but think that one day that you'll... That you'll find someone else."
Kangin laid down beside him and pulled him against him, Leeteuk didn't react. "That won't happen."
"Because you'll fight it." Leeteuk reasoned. "You feel sorry for me, enough that even if you fell for someone else, you would force yourself to stay with me."
Kangin lowered his eyes. "I wouldn't-"
"Don't say you won't." Leeteuk said firmly, his voice however said otherwise. It was broken and afraid that one day that future will truly happen, the day Kangin would abandon him.
"Do you remember what I asked you before?" Kangin asked, he didn't answer. "I asked you if you would move in with me-"
"I remember." Leeteuk answered quietly.
Kangin shifted slightly. "That question hasn't been answered yet." Leeteuk stiffened.
"You only want me there so you can keep a better eye on me." He accused.
"No," Kangin interrupted. "I mean- Maybe partly, but that's not the full reason." A short silence ensued.
"...Why would you want me to move in?" He asked.
Kangin smiled. "Because you're the first person I want to see when I open my eyes." He felt Leeteuk turn around, they were now face to face.
"You want to see a disfigured person?" He asked in disbelief.
Kangin shook his head. "You're not disfigured-"
"Don't lie."
"You're not disfigured." Kangin stated. Leeteuk looked away from his eyes.
"You must be blind." He murmured, Kangin affectionately brushed the hair away from his eyes. Leeteuk closed his eyes as Kangin enveloped him in his arms. Cradling the withdrawn man, as if at any moment he would break.
He carefully moved the scarf as it revealed his scarred neck, Leeteuk flinched but allowed him. He placed his hand on his neck and brushed his lips against his. Leeteuk opened his eyes and pulled back enough to see his own reflection in Kangin's eyes.
All he saw were his flaws.
"You don't want an imperfection like me." Leeteuk uttered, Kangin shook his head as he cupped his face.
"You can believe that I don't see it or choose not to." He gently caressed his cheek with this fingers. "But it hasn't changed how much I feel about you."
He wiped a single tear that fell from Leeteuk's reddened eyes. They both closed their eyes as their lips barely touched. "I love you." He declared as he kissed him fully on the lips.
When morning came, Kangin slowly opened his eyes, his vision slowly forming as he recognized where he was and the person he was holding. He smiled when he felt his phone vibrate, he sighed knowing this meant he had to go to work. He carefully moved him away from Leeteuk's grasp and left the room.
Leeteuk stirred slightly as he woke up, he felt a slight chill as the warmth was now gone. He reached his hand and felt around, he opened his eyes and saw nothing. He jumped up and looked around, his eyes searching for him when he gulped slightly. His insecurity brutally taunting him.
He had really left.
He felt himself shake as he lowered his head onto his knees. The door creaked opened and he looked up with watered eyes. He rushed from the bed and embraced Kangin as his hands clung to his shirt. Kangin held him protectively and whispered assurances, rubbing his back as he soothe him until his shaking stopped.
His phone rang again and Kangin cursed mentally at the wretched device. "I'm sorry, I'll-"
Leeteuk stopped his hand and gave him a miserably forced smile. "It's fine... go to work." He walked away and returned to his bed, covering himself with the sheets.
Kangin breathed in as he nodded. "Come by later." He said as he opened the door, Leeteuk made no reply. "And please... think about what I asked you." With that he closed the door.
Leeteuk kept his eyes open as he stayed inside the covers, pondering when his own cell phone rang. He pulled the covers off and reached for his cell phone on the table beside. He opened it.
"Have you thought about it?" Kangin asked.
Leeteuk smiled shyly. "Give me some time to think about it." A few seconds passed.
"It's enough time right?" Leeteuk chuckled as he laid back into the covers.
"You're impatient." He stated as he closed his eyes.
"I can't help it," Kangin replied. "I've always wanted it... And this morning proved to me that I still want this." Leeteuk buried himself within the covers, remembering the warmth that engulfed him.
He wanted it too.
"Kangin," He called softly. "I'll move in with you." A silence ensued. "Kangin?"
"Do you realized how long I waited for that answer?" Leeteuk smiled. "Later on today, I'll be by to start moving your things-"
"I just made my decision." Leeteuk murmured.
"And lets not waste another day." Leeteuk chuckled. "Ah, the boss is calling me, I'll be by later."
"Okay." They said their goodbyes as he closed the phone and curled up in the bed covers.
The wall across him that encased the mirror had only a few pieces left. In its remnants, reflect a resting man on the bed, revealing a perfect dimpled smile.
- ❄ Challenge 30 ❄ | ❄ Finish ❄ -
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A/N: This is now the completed Suju 31-Shots List ~! :)
Easily one of the hardest I had to write, not that the prompt itself was, but mostly because I wanted to test myself. Along with the challenges, I tried to test myself in other areas as well, and for some reason I've been in a angstish mood lately....
On a lighter note, 31 days went by pretty quickly, this was definitely fun to do and I thank my prompter :D and my sometimes unwilling beta (unless its kangteuk) but they definitely had a huge part in this ^^. I'll miss the challenges, some came by easier than others. A few questionable ones that had me nearly banging my head to think of something @.@ but even then, once something clicked I just loved it. Once I finish my other projects, will definitely consider doing it again ^^.
❄ Happy Holidays and Happy New Year's Eve/Day! :D ❄