Living in the now - Chapter 4 - Waking up in Landstuhl
For warnings,please check out chapter 1 of this story.
This chapter can also be found on AO3.
Jack is finally allowed out of bed. They placed him in a wheelchair to avoid putting strain on his ribs and leg. The first thing he does is wheel himself to the ICU. He introduces himself to the staff before asking if he can see Mac.
‘You must be Jack. I’m Evan, Macgyver´s day nurse.’
Jack is a taken aback for a moment and the nurse grins, ‘we were warned for you guys.’
‘Just worried about the kid.’
The nurse nods, ‘did anyone tell you about the extent of his injuries?’
‘Yeah, broken bones, head injuries, burns, did I miss anything?’
‘No you got the most important stuff.’
‘Can I see him?’
‘Yeah, visiting policies here at Landstuhl are a bit different than in your regular hospital. I guess you accompanied him during transport, so I can tell you he is more comfortable here, but I still need you to know that he needs a lot of equipment, so please don´t be overwhelmed, everything is there to help him. Let´s go.’
The way the ICU is designed, the nurses can see all the patients through the glass walls from the nurses’ desk. Evan takes Jack´s wheelchair and pushes him into one of the glass rooms. Jack swallows when he sees Mac. He is so still. Mac is never still, he always reminds Jack of an over excited puppy.
His head is still bald, and his face is swollen and there are some burns visible. There is a tube sprouting from one side of head, it is eerie to see. Both his hands and arms are bandaged, and that is just the parts that are visible. The only sound is the machines keeping Mac alive.
Jack doesn´t realize the room is cold until Evan drops a blanket over his shoulders and legs.
‘We’re keeping the room chilled to give Mac some extra help to heal.
‘When will he wake up?’
‘They are keeping him in a medical induced coma to give his brain time to heal.’
Jack pushes the wheelchair closer to the bed, so he can touch Mac. He needs the physical contact.
He can hear the squeak of Evan´s sneakers leaving the room.
* * *
The medical team quickly takes a liking to the two brothers in ICU room 2106. A cot has been brought in and Jack keeps his vigil when he isn´t in therapy sessions himself. He talks to the docs and since Mac doesn´t have any known living next of kin listed, the docs are happy to discuss their treatment with Jack who seems genuinely interested.
It’s almost two weeks when a meeting is called, Mac´s primary physician, a neurologist, his respiratory therapist, the head nurse of the ICU and Jack sit together to discuss Mac. After the latest tests they came to the conclusion that it is time to wake Mac up so they can assess his injuries better.
‘That is good news, right?’
Jack looks hopeful around the room.
‘It is Jack, but you must realize that Mac has been in the induced coma and ventilated for almost two weeks and waking up will not be like flipping on a light switch.
‘OK, I get it, but I thrust Mac, he can do this.’
‘We just want you to be aware that Mac will probably go through a phase of confusion, agitation and sometimes even aggression due to the side effects of the sedatives and opiates we are giving him.’
‘That´s OK, he is a skinny kid, I can handle him.’
‘Jack, you should also know that most patients don´t remember the accident or their time in the Intensive Care, so don´t worry too much about the confusion, it is perfectly normal.’
‘I have heard enough, let´s do this.’
The team makes their notes in Mac´s medical file and tell Jack they will start to ween Mac off the sedatives immediately.
* * *
Mac wakes in a light room, it is white, clean, there is no sand and dust, it is cool, which seems odd since the last thing he remembers is being in Afghanistan. There is nobody with him in the room, he asks if there is anyone, but there is only the echo of his own voice.
He’s doing OK, this is just a minor setback.
‘Jack?’
…need to be patient….
Jack? He can hear voices but he can´t see anyone. He tries again, ‘Hello?’, but no one answers.
There is an annoying beeping sound, it’s rhythmic and regular. What is that sound?
He starts walking around to see where he is. The voices seem to come from above him. He sits down for a moment to listen to the voices.
* * *
He starts awake by the voices again.
Come on Mac, come back to us.
Jack, it will happen.
Something is in his throat, it is choking him. He must be captured. Jack? Help me! He claws at whatever is choking him.
Panic washes over him.
Jack! Jack! I´m here. Mac wants to jump up but he is restrained. He looks at his wrists and he is bound. He starts pulling to get free. Where is Jack.
… need to do it….
…pull intubation tube…
He can´t get out of the restraints so he stops fighting them, closing his eyes, he is so tired.
* * *
‘Jack, stop jabbering in my ear, I can´t concentrate.’
His throat hurts, he tries to remember if he had a cold or what happened. Something must have happened.
What?
Wait
What if he is dead?
No, he can´t be dead, right? He would know, wouldn´t he?
* * *
Mac?
He starts awake.
Mac! Come on man, my ass is getting numb sitting here.
‘I´m here, Jack!’
The damn restraints keep him from going to look for Jack.
He starts again when someone takes his hand. Warm fingers wrap around his restrained hand. But why is there no body attached to the hand?
… Extubate tomorrow…
He calms, the voices talking and the rubbing of the fingers almost hypnotic. He drifts back asleep, smiling.
* * *
Come on Mac, wake up.
Wake up? But he is awake, what is Jack talking about?
Mac you need to open your eyes. I know you can.
Open his eyes? Wait, maybe he is asleep and had a nightmare.
He opens his eyes and stares in the face of Jack and another man who looks like a doctor. The grin on Jack´s face gets wider.
‘Hi there Mac, good to see you awake.’ Says the other man.
Mac can see tears in Jack´s eyes. Why is he crying? He wants to ask, but there is something in his throat and he panics. Alarms start wailing, adding to his confusion and panic.
‘Mac, calm down, you’re intubated, but we are ready to extubate you. We’re going to do this in the OR, because there is a chance you need a tracheostomy.’
Mac stares at the man, before seeking Jack again who is telling him everything is going to be OK.
The doc explains the procedure, but he is so tired he can feel himself drift off again.
‘Mac, I need you to stay awake a bit longer, OK?’
Mac pries his eyes open and they are in an OR. When did this happen?
Twenty minutes later the tubes is gone and no trach was necessary. He is exhausted and when someone tells him to rest, he lets himself drift off.
* * *
Mac is awake! Jack is ecstatic, Mac is going to be fine. They extubated Mac and he is breathing under his own power. He still can´t believe it.
‘Jack?’
He looks up at the voice, it’s Evan. He likes the guy, he is no nonsense and brutally honest sometimes.
‘Mac will be out for some time, the extubation took a lot out of him, and we gave him some pain medication for the burns.’
‘You said the skin grafts were healing well.’
‘They are, but they must cause him quote some discomfort.’
‘He doesn´t look like he is in pain.’
‘Not for the moment, we are monitoring him closely. Pain works counterproductive. But on another note. Ortho called and said they expected you for your check-up.’
‘Oh shit, I completely forgot.’ Jack picks up his crutches.
‘No, you don´t. I called patient transport to come and bring you.’
‘I don´t …’
‘Stop making excuses. They will take you, it’s quicker and more efficient. Now, let´s go.’
Jack sits down in the wheelchair and lets himself be taken to his checkup.
* * *
New cast on his leg, Jack is wheeled back to the ICU. When he arrives they are serving out dinner. The food is a lot better than in the field, so he eats it with gusto, watching some news channel. The moment Mac moves, he puts his fork and knife down.
‘Mac?’
Mac scrunches up his face. He tests his arms, but they are no longer restrained. They removed those when they extubated him. The tension leaves his body and slowly his eyes open to little slits;
‘Hey Carl´s junior. Good to see you awake. How are you feeling?’
Mac´s eyes sluggishly slide towards Jack, before they close again. Jack knows not to be disappointed, but he still is.
After dinner he watches some television and talks to his family. One of the nurses brought in a tablet o he could skype with his family, letting them know he is alright. Mac stirs but doesn´t really wake up. So Jack decides to go to bed early entering the bathroom to brush his teeth. He gets in the cot and makes himself comfortable when Mac starts to move again.
‘Mac?’
He gets up again and stands next to the bed, trying not to put weight on the leg. He slowly rubs Mac´s arm and it must make Mac aware of his presence, because he slowly opens his eyes and searches.
‘Hey Mac, you’re gonna be OK, you’re in hospital.’
Mac´s eyes sluggishly track Jack.
‘That´s it kid, you’re doing good. Do you need anything? Are you in pain?’
Mac just blinks.
Jack slowly extends his hand and rubs away a stray tear.
‘Rest son, I will be here.’
Mac´s eyes close and Jack lets out a groan when he moves. Pain radiates up his leg. He really should ask the nurse for some pain killers. He is still thinking what he will do when Ma´s night nurse enters.
‘How is our boy doing?’
‘He just woke up for a moment. But only stared, didn´t say anything. Is he in pain?’
‘No, we monitor him closely.’ She checks his in and output and types it in his medical report before turning to Jack.
‘How are you doing? It’s time for your meds.’
‘OK, if you insists.’
The nurse smiles, ‘are you ready for bed? Then settle in and I will get you your pills.’
Jack nods and lies down. The nurse re-enters, handing him a cup with pills and one with water. He swallows them and snuggles in.
‘Good night Mac, Jack.’
‘Good night.’
* * *
This chapter can also be found on AO3.
Jack is finally allowed out of bed. They placed him in a wheelchair to avoid putting strain on his ribs and leg. The first thing he does is wheel himself to the ICU. He introduces himself to the staff before asking if he can see Mac.
‘You must be Jack. I’m Evan, Macgyver´s day nurse.’
Jack is a taken aback for a moment and the nurse grins, ‘we were warned for you guys.’
‘Just worried about the kid.’
The nurse nods, ‘did anyone tell you about the extent of his injuries?’
‘Yeah, broken bones, head injuries, burns, did I miss anything?’
‘No you got the most important stuff.’
‘Can I see him?’
‘Yeah, visiting policies here at Landstuhl are a bit different than in your regular hospital. I guess you accompanied him during transport, so I can tell you he is more comfortable here, but I still need you to know that he needs a lot of equipment, so please don´t be overwhelmed, everything is there to help him. Let´s go.’
The way the ICU is designed, the nurses can see all the patients through the glass walls from the nurses’ desk. Evan takes Jack´s wheelchair and pushes him into one of the glass rooms. Jack swallows when he sees Mac. He is so still. Mac is never still, he always reminds Jack of an over excited puppy.
His head is still bald, and his face is swollen and there are some burns visible. There is a tube sprouting from one side of head, it is eerie to see. Both his hands and arms are bandaged, and that is just the parts that are visible. The only sound is the machines keeping Mac alive.
Jack doesn´t realize the room is cold until Evan drops a blanket over his shoulders and legs.
‘We’re keeping the room chilled to give Mac some extra help to heal.
‘When will he wake up?’
‘They are keeping him in a medical induced coma to give his brain time to heal.’
Jack pushes the wheelchair closer to the bed, so he can touch Mac. He needs the physical contact.
He can hear the squeak of Evan´s sneakers leaving the room.
* * *
The medical team quickly takes a liking to the two brothers in ICU room 2106. A cot has been brought in and Jack keeps his vigil when he isn´t in therapy sessions himself. He talks to the docs and since Mac doesn´t have any known living next of kin listed, the docs are happy to discuss their treatment with Jack who seems genuinely interested.
It’s almost two weeks when a meeting is called, Mac´s primary physician, a neurologist, his respiratory therapist, the head nurse of the ICU and Jack sit together to discuss Mac. After the latest tests they came to the conclusion that it is time to wake Mac up so they can assess his injuries better.
‘That is good news, right?’
Jack looks hopeful around the room.
‘It is Jack, but you must realize that Mac has been in the induced coma and ventilated for almost two weeks and waking up will not be like flipping on a light switch.
‘OK, I get it, but I thrust Mac, he can do this.’
‘We just want you to be aware that Mac will probably go through a phase of confusion, agitation and sometimes even aggression due to the side effects of the sedatives and opiates we are giving him.’
‘That´s OK, he is a skinny kid, I can handle him.’
‘Jack, you should also know that most patients don´t remember the accident or their time in the Intensive Care, so don´t worry too much about the confusion, it is perfectly normal.’
‘I have heard enough, let´s do this.’
The team makes their notes in Mac´s medical file and tell Jack they will start to ween Mac off the sedatives immediately.
* * *
Mac wakes in a light room, it is white, clean, there is no sand and dust, it is cool, which seems odd since the last thing he remembers is being in Afghanistan. There is nobody with him in the room, he asks if there is anyone, but there is only the echo of his own voice.
He’s doing OK, this is just a minor setback.
‘Jack?’
…need to be patient….
Jack? He can hear voices but he can´t see anyone. He tries again, ‘Hello?’, but no one answers.
There is an annoying beeping sound, it’s rhythmic and regular. What is that sound?
He starts walking around to see where he is. The voices seem to come from above him. He sits down for a moment to listen to the voices.
* * *
He starts awake by the voices again.
Come on Mac, come back to us.
Jack, it will happen.
Something is in his throat, it is choking him. He must be captured. Jack? Help me! He claws at whatever is choking him.
Panic washes over him.
Jack! Jack! I´m here. Mac wants to jump up but he is restrained. He looks at his wrists and he is bound. He starts pulling to get free. Where is Jack.
… need to do it….
…pull intubation tube…
He can´t get out of the restraints so he stops fighting them, closing his eyes, he is so tired.
* * *
‘Jack, stop jabbering in my ear, I can´t concentrate.’
His throat hurts, he tries to remember if he had a cold or what happened. Something must have happened.
What?
Wait
What if he is dead?
No, he can´t be dead, right? He would know, wouldn´t he?
* * *
Mac?
He starts awake.
Mac! Come on man, my ass is getting numb sitting here.
‘I´m here, Jack!’
The damn restraints keep him from going to look for Jack.
He starts again when someone takes his hand. Warm fingers wrap around his restrained hand. But why is there no body attached to the hand?
… Extubate tomorrow…
He calms, the voices talking and the rubbing of the fingers almost hypnotic. He drifts back asleep, smiling.
* * *
Come on Mac, wake up.
Wake up? But he is awake, what is Jack talking about?
Mac you need to open your eyes. I know you can.
Open his eyes? Wait, maybe he is asleep and had a nightmare.
He opens his eyes and stares in the face of Jack and another man who looks like a doctor. The grin on Jack´s face gets wider.
‘Hi there Mac, good to see you awake.’ Says the other man.
Mac can see tears in Jack´s eyes. Why is he crying? He wants to ask, but there is something in his throat and he panics. Alarms start wailing, adding to his confusion and panic.
‘Mac, calm down, you’re intubated, but we are ready to extubate you. We’re going to do this in the OR, because there is a chance you need a tracheostomy.’
Mac stares at the man, before seeking Jack again who is telling him everything is going to be OK.
The doc explains the procedure, but he is so tired he can feel himself drift off again.
‘Mac, I need you to stay awake a bit longer, OK?’
Mac pries his eyes open and they are in an OR. When did this happen?
Twenty minutes later the tubes is gone and no trach was necessary. He is exhausted and when someone tells him to rest, he lets himself drift off.
* * *
Mac is awake! Jack is ecstatic, Mac is going to be fine. They extubated Mac and he is breathing under his own power. He still can´t believe it.
‘Jack?’
He looks up at the voice, it’s Evan. He likes the guy, he is no nonsense and brutally honest sometimes.
‘Mac will be out for some time, the extubation took a lot out of him, and we gave him some pain medication for the burns.’
‘You said the skin grafts were healing well.’
‘They are, but they must cause him quote some discomfort.’
‘He doesn´t look like he is in pain.’
‘Not for the moment, we are monitoring him closely. Pain works counterproductive. But on another note. Ortho called and said they expected you for your check-up.’
‘Oh shit, I completely forgot.’ Jack picks up his crutches.
‘No, you don´t. I called patient transport to come and bring you.’
‘I don´t …’
‘Stop making excuses. They will take you, it’s quicker and more efficient. Now, let´s go.’
Jack sits down in the wheelchair and lets himself be taken to his checkup.
* * *
New cast on his leg, Jack is wheeled back to the ICU. When he arrives they are serving out dinner. The food is a lot better than in the field, so he eats it with gusto, watching some news channel. The moment Mac moves, he puts his fork and knife down.
‘Mac?’
Mac scrunches up his face. He tests his arms, but they are no longer restrained. They removed those when they extubated him. The tension leaves his body and slowly his eyes open to little slits;
‘Hey Carl´s junior. Good to see you awake. How are you feeling?’
Mac´s eyes sluggishly slide towards Jack, before they close again. Jack knows not to be disappointed, but he still is.
After dinner he watches some television and talks to his family. One of the nurses brought in a tablet o he could skype with his family, letting them know he is alright. Mac stirs but doesn´t really wake up. So Jack decides to go to bed early entering the bathroom to brush his teeth. He gets in the cot and makes himself comfortable when Mac starts to move again.
‘Mac?’
He gets up again and stands next to the bed, trying not to put weight on the leg. He slowly rubs Mac´s arm and it must make Mac aware of his presence, because he slowly opens his eyes and searches.
‘Hey Mac, you’re gonna be OK, you’re in hospital.’
Mac´s eyes sluggishly track Jack.
‘That´s it kid, you’re doing good. Do you need anything? Are you in pain?’
Mac just blinks.
Jack slowly extends his hand and rubs away a stray tear.
‘Rest son, I will be here.’
Mac´s eyes close and Jack lets out a groan when he moves. Pain radiates up his leg. He really should ask the nurse for some pain killers. He is still thinking what he will do when Ma´s night nurse enters.
‘How is our boy doing?’
‘He just woke up for a moment. But only stared, didn´t say anything. Is he in pain?’
‘No, we monitor him closely.’ She checks his in and output and types it in his medical report before turning to Jack.
‘How are you doing? It’s time for your meds.’
‘OK, if you insists.’
The nurse smiles, ‘are you ready for bed? Then settle in and I will get you your pills.’
Jack nods and lies down. The nurse re-enters, handing him a cup with pills and one with water. He swallows them and snuggles in.
‘Good night Mac, Jack.’
‘Good night.’
* * *