Sentimental crap
I feel like Im going to puke. It must be the excedrin I took. (Hopefully) My mommy and I are going to shop our booty's off today. I need a few winter things and essentials before my departure. Yesterday was a day of good news. Instead of having to get a full set of tires I only needed one, my dad is giving me money for living expenses today, and I get to take my moms bike with me.
Today I will be saying good-bye to friends. This time around is a little bit harder than last because now I have experienced what happens when you leave and come back. When you come back you realize sometimes the bonds you have made just werent strong enough to last through such a long disconnection. For some reason certain friendships survive through it and some dont. I have been blessed this summer to make some bonds even stronger. I know that no matter where I go or how long I've been gone we can always get together and eat, drink and be merry. Recently with in the last couple of weeks I have had a very faint, but scary feeling. Its because I know I have to start over again. I am so very fortunate to be making this transition with someone I love; last year I didnt have that comfort. Unfortunately that has not subsided my fears, if anything only has added to them. I am able to say to my-self at least we have eachother, but what the realistic side of me says is, we will only have eachother. (Only, being the operative word here.) Part of me of course thinks what a horrible thing to think, but I cant deny the truth, it is a scary thought. Although I do not make friends easily I do thrive off of these relationships. I love being by myself, I have no problem with doing so, I charish those moments. Even though I am comfortable with myself like everyone else I need friendship. If not taken for granted it is a wonderful thing. If not an extended part of family they are family. We have been friends for such a long time and it is so hard to hold on to that. This is why I cherish it and I can only hope that it will survive yet another page in my life. I should be so lucky to make half the connection with others. Thank you so much for caring so much about me. You dont even have to say it for me to know.
Today I will be saying good-bye to friends. This time around is a little bit harder than last because now I have experienced what happens when you leave and come back. When you come back you realize sometimes the bonds you have made just werent strong enough to last through such a long disconnection. For some reason certain friendships survive through it and some dont. I have been blessed this summer to make some bonds even stronger. I know that no matter where I go or how long I've been gone we can always get together and eat, drink and be merry. Recently with in the last couple of weeks I have had a very faint, but scary feeling. Its because I know I have to start over again. I am so very fortunate to be making this transition with someone I love; last year I didnt have that comfort. Unfortunately that has not subsided my fears, if anything only has added to them. I am able to say to my-self at least we have eachother, but what the realistic side of me says is, we will only have eachother. (Only, being the operative word here.) Part of me of course thinks what a horrible thing to think, but I cant deny the truth, it is a scary thought. Although I do not make friends easily I do thrive off of these relationships. I love being by myself, I have no problem with doing so, I charish those moments. Even though I am comfortable with myself like everyone else I need friendship. If not taken for granted it is a wonderful thing. If not an extended part of family they are family. We have been friends for such a long time and it is so hard to hold on to that. This is why I cherish it and I can only hope that it will survive yet another page in my life. I should be so lucky to make half the connection with others. Thank you so much for caring so much about me. You dont even have to say it for me to know.