Hail to the Meme! Movie Meme V: The White House Edition
OK. It's the Special Inaugural Edition of the Movie Quotes Meme! Fifteen quotes (and a bonus). Common thread is that they are all from movies that feature the President of the United States (real ones, as well as fictional) in some way. Catch is, not all the lines are spoken by actors playing the President. Go to it, loyal readers!
1. "If I remember correctly, you didn't like the sporting good store. Working for the investment firm wasn't for you either, or the oil rig job. "
2. "I think it's important you remember that's a political distinction that comes with the office. I mean, if, uh, Eisenhower were here instead of me, he'd be dead by now."
3. "Nobody does this to the United States. The President will get his baseball glove back and play catch with this guy's balls! "
4. "The American people are terrified. They know something's coming. They can feel it. And we can either shovel them the same old shit and call it sugar or we can arm them."
5. "God doesn't punish the wicked and reward the righteous. Everyone dies. Some die because they deserve to; others die simply because they come from Minneapolis. It's random and it's meaningless."
6. "Yeah, sir, you might want to send a maintenance man over to that office across the way. The lights are off, and they must be looking for a fuse box, 'cause them flashlights, they keep me awake. "
7. "The United States is a non-smoking nation! No smoking, no drugs, no alcohol, no women - unless you're married - no foul language, no red meat!"
8. "All I wanted, was to be a Roman Catholic priest. To live in a monastery, serve God. But I had one fuckin'...one terrible fuckin' weakness! And they de-frocked me!"
9. "Hail to the Chief, if you don't, I'll have to kill you. I am the Chief, so you better watch your step, you bastards."
9a. "'Hail to the Chief, he's the chief and he needs hailing. He is the chief, so everybody hail like crazy. Hail to...' that's more or less how it went."
10. "I can no longer sit back and allow Communist infiltration, Communist indoctrination, Communist subversion and the international Communist conspiracy to sap and impurify all of our precious bodily fluids!"
11. "How dare you come into this office and bark at me like some little junkyard dog? I am the President of the United States! "
12. "You are to shoot the presidential nominee through the head. And Johnny will rise gallantly to his feet and lift Ben Arthur's body in his arms, stand in front of the microphones and begin to speak. The speech is short. But it's the most rousing speech I've ever read. It's been worked on, here and in Russia, on and off, for over eight years."
13. "You guys are probably pretty tired, right? Well, you should be. Go on home, get a nice hot bath. Rest up... 15 minutes. Then get your asses back in gear. We're under a lot of pressure, you know, and you put us there. Nothing's riding on this except the, uh, first amendment to the Constitution, freedom of the press, and maybe the future of the country. Not that any of that matters, but if you guys fuck up again, I'm going to get mad. Goodnight. "
14. "Jiminy Jumpin' Jesus, I can't believe we're gonna pay that madman. I got nukes out the ying-yang. Just let me launch one, for God's sake."
15. "Hail to the Chief, he's the one they all say 'hail' to. They all say hail, 'cause he keeps himself so clean. He's got the power, that's why he's in the shower, he is the cleanest Chief that you've ever seen."
And the bonus:
"Excuse me, Mr. President. I was not informed that you were in the middle of... what the hell ARE you in the middle of?"
1. "If I remember correctly, you didn't like the sporting good store. Working for the investment firm wasn't for you either, or the oil rig job. "
2. "I think it's important you remember that's a political distinction that comes with the office. I mean, if, uh, Eisenhower were here instead of me, he'd be dead by now."
3. "Nobody does this to the United States. The President will get his baseball glove back and play catch with this guy's balls! "
4. "The American people are terrified. They know something's coming. They can feel it. And we can either shovel them the same old shit and call it sugar or we can arm them."
5. "God doesn't punish the wicked and reward the righteous. Everyone dies. Some die because they deserve to; others die simply because they come from Minneapolis. It's random and it's meaningless."
6. "Yeah, sir, you might want to send a maintenance man over to that office across the way. The lights are off, and they must be looking for a fuse box, 'cause them flashlights, they keep me awake. "
7. "The United States is a non-smoking nation! No smoking, no drugs, no alcohol, no women - unless you're married - no foul language, no red meat!"
8. "All I wanted, was to be a Roman Catholic priest. To live in a monastery, serve God. But I had one fuckin'...one terrible fuckin' weakness! And they de-frocked me!"
9. "Hail to the Chief, if you don't, I'll have to kill you. I am the Chief, so you better watch your step, you bastards."
9a. "'Hail to the Chief, he's the chief and he needs hailing. He is the chief, so everybody hail like crazy. Hail to...' that's more or less how it went."
10. "I can no longer sit back and allow Communist infiltration, Communist indoctrination, Communist subversion and the international Communist conspiracy to sap and impurify all of our precious bodily fluids!"
11. "How dare you come into this office and bark at me like some little junkyard dog? I am the President of the United States! "
12. "You are to shoot the presidential nominee through the head. And Johnny will rise gallantly to his feet and lift Ben Arthur's body in his arms, stand in front of the microphones and begin to speak. The speech is short. But it's the most rousing speech I've ever read. It's been worked on, here and in Russia, on and off, for over eight years."
13. "You guys are probably pretty tired, right? Well, you should be. Go on home, get a nice hot bath. Rest up... 15 minutes. Then get your asses back in gear. We're under a lot of pressure, you know, and you put us there. Nothing's riding on this except the, uh, first amendment to the Constitution, freedom of the press, and maybe the future of the country. Not that any of that matters, but if you guys fuck up again, I'm going to get mad. Goodnight. "
14. "Jiminy Jumpin' Jesus, I can't believe we're gonna pay that madman. I got nukes out the ying-yang. Just let me launch one, for God's sake."
15. "Hail to the Chief, he's the one they all say 'hail' to. They all say hail, 'cause he keeps himself so clean. He's got the power, that's why he's in the shower, he is the cleanest Chief that you've ever seen."
And the bonus:
"Excuse me, Mr. President. I was not informed that you were in the middle of... what the hell ARE you in the middle of?"