the reasons just pile up
Daily, I am encountering more and more reasons why it is imperative that I do not live with my mother anymore.
Just today this is what smacked me in the face, again- and all very obvious.
1) She bitches that I am never home- which is true, because honestly, I avoid her like the plague- I don't want to deal with even seeing her drunk. So, when I am home, she's either already drunk or at least well on her way.
2) I really hate it when I don't have any plans after work and that means I have to go home right after work.
3) I saw my doctor today and I asked her about what my mom said to her regarding her drinking (because I mentioned it to her that last time I saw her, and my mom and I share the same doctor)Jane (the doctor) told me my mom said that has 1-2 glasses of wine with dinner. It seems that my mom forgets the nights that she drinks a whole bottle of wine by herself or the times when a bottle of vodka lasts her only 2 evenings. Mty doctor has told me that I need to approach this situation head on, not sugar coated as I have been doing. SHe even asked me if she should call child services.... How the fuck is someone supposed to feel to that?
4) When looking at my cell phone bill, I discovered that my brother spent over $50 on text messaging- that means he has sent and received over 500 text messages. A bit much, don't you think? When I told my mom, her response is "He's in love, veronica, that's the price of being in love, you don't know how it is." WTF?
5) Home doesn't feel like home anymore. I'm beginning to feel like a wanderer- a bit homeless. I don't necessarily feel "welcome" in my own house, and I feel as though I'm imposing when I stay at my boyfriend's house. No where to go half the time.
This is all in just the morning.
At least I'm well rested today, and I get to see my therapist after work.
Fuck. fuck. fuck. fuck.
Just today this is what smacked me in the face, again- and all very obvious.
1) She bitches that I am never home- which is true, because honestly, I avoid her like the plague- I don't want to deal with even seeing her drunk. So, when I am home, she's either already drunk or at least well on her way.
2) I really hate it when I don't have any plans after work and that means I have to go home right after work.
3) I saw my doctor today and I asked her about what my mom said to her regarding her drinking (because I mentioned it to her that last time I saw her, and my mom and I share the same doctor)Jane (the doctor) told me my mom said that has 1-2 glasses of wine with dinner. It seems that my mom forgets the nights that she drinks a whole bottle of wine by herself or the times when a bottle of vodka lasts her only 2 evenings. Mty doctor has told me that I need to approach this situation head on, not sugar coated as I have been doing. SHe even asked me if she should call child services.... How the fuck is someone supposed to feel to that?
4) When looking at my cell phone bill, I discovered that my brother spent over $50 on text messaging- that means he has sent and received over 500 text messages. A bit much, don't you think? When I told my mom, her response is "He's in love, veronica, that's the price of being in love, you don't know how it is." WTF?
5) Home doesn't feel like home anymore. I'm beginning to feel like a wanderer- a bit homeless. I don't necessarily feel "welcome" in my own house, and I feel as though I'm imposing when I stay at my boyfriend's house. No where to go half the time.
This is all in just the morning.
At least I'm well rested today, and I get to see my therapist after work.
Fuck. fuck. fuck. fuck.