(no subject)
Judgement day is coming soon :[.
I guess I should keep my head up about it and see it as a way of getting my act together. Then again my act IS together, I feel like. And it's been together. Then again everything is a lesson learned, and maybe at the time I was getting a bit out of control. I feel okay now though.
I think alcohol was a scapegoat. I think it was really just something that added to the real problem, which was a lack of motivation and procrastination. I guess the real problem is just my lazy ass self sometimes. It's what's in the mirror rather than in the bottle. I know I'm not like my brothers, or how my dad used to be once.
My addictions have always been the high from painting or sketching and the roller-coaster of emotions you feel when you listen to a powerful song. The mixture of the two is what I've been missing. I just haven't been using the right drugs lately.
I guess I should keep my head up about it and see it as a way of getting my act together. Then again my act IS together, I feel like. And it's been together. Then again everything is a lesson learned, and maybe at the time I was getting a bit out of control. I feel okay now though.
I think alcohol was a scapegoat. I think it was really just something that added to the real problem, which was a lack of motivation and procrastination. I guess the real problem is just my lazy ass self sometimes. It's what's in the mirror rather than in the bottle. I know I'm not like my brothers, or how my dad used to be once.
My addictions have always been the high from painting or sketching and the roller-coaster of emotions you feel when you listen to a powerful song. The mixture of the two is what I've been missing. I just haven't been using the right drugs lately.