Such pain as this, shouldn't have to be experienced, I'm still reeling from the loss
Today was a really hard day. It started off fine, I did a bit of shopping for revision supplies and then went home. Easy, lovely.
My Mum picked my Granddad up and brought him over. He's been having a shit time recently, because the flat he lives in is having the floor dug up because a pipe leaking under it. He's 87, and he lives in his own flat, but it's like in a group of flats that is maintained by helpers. It's not a home, I mean you'd never realise it wasn't just his own flat somewhere if it wasn't for the long red cord in the bathroom and the reception. Basically, he's very independent. For his age he's brilliant, goes for walks every day, and is in great health. It's wonderful. But my Dad hardly goes to see him and so that's another thing that's been getting him upset, I mean he's great but he's still old and he's so sad at the moment.
Anyway, recently over the last few months we've noticed his mind has been going a bit. Nothing huge, but just a slight deteriation, like I'll tell him one thing one second and he'll have forgotten it by the next. Nothing important, just little things. It as a very small bump by bump ride, but he was basically fine, just showing his age a bit. Since he's been chucked out of his flat and having to live in the spare flat, he's suddenly bombed. Today he wet himself and didn't even realise. It was one of the most heartbreaking things I have ever seen in my life. I'm crying right now as I type it out.
I mean, he's been so good, and then suddenly it's like he went from being a healthy, brilliant Granddad, to ... that. I love him, I really do, and I can't believe my Dad, his own fucking son can't be bothered to go see him. I don't understand. My Dad doesn't want to see me, fine, be a bitch, but my Granddad has never done anything to deserve being abandoned at this age. My Mum, who I don't for a minute get on with, has been fantastic. She's gone over everyday, spending the day with him, checking up on him, bringing him over.
I'm just really down atm, and it's just getting worse. I keep thinking about my Dad. He keeps phoning my Mum every fucking hour, yet he can't phone me. I'm his daughter. Or even his own father! I would rather he never speak to me again and spend more time with his dad, than this. I really don't think my Granddad has long left, and I have never thought such a devastating thing in my life :'(
My Mum picked my Granddad up and brought him over. He's been having a shit time recently, because the flat he lives in is having the floor dug up because a pipe leaking under it. He's 87, and he lives in his own flat, but it's like in a group of flats that is maintained by helpers. It's not a home, I mean you'd never realise it wasn't just his own flat somewhere if it wasn't for the long red cord in the bathroom and the reception. Basically, he's very independent. For his age he's brilliant, goes for walks every day, and is in great health. It's wonderful. But my Dad hardly goes to see him and so that's another thing that's been getting him upset, I mean he's great but he's still old and he's so sad at the moment.
Anyway, recently over the last few months we've noticed his mind has been going a bit. Nothing huge, but just a slight deteriation, like I'll tell him one thing one second and he'll have forgotten it by the next. Nothing important, just little things. It as a very small bump by bump ride, but he was basically fine, just showing his age a bit. Since he's been chucked out of his flat and having to live in the spare flat, he's suddenly bombed. Today he wet himself and didn't even realise. It was one of the most heartbreaking things I have ever seen in my life. I'm crying right now as I type it out.
I mean, he's been so good, and then suddenly it's like he went from being a healthy, brilliant Granddad, to ... that. I love him, I really do, and I can't believe my Dad, his own fucking son can't be bothered to go see him. I don't understand. My Dad doesn't want to see me, fine, be a bitch, but my Granddad has never done anything to deserve being abandoned at this age. My Mum, who I don't for a minute get on with, has been fantastic. She's gone over everyday, spending the day with him, checking up on him, bringing him over.
I'm just really down atm, and it's just getting worse. I keep thinking about my Dad. He keeps phoning my Mum every fucking hour, yet he can't phone me. I'm his daughter. Or even his own father! I would rather he never speak to me again and spend more time with his dad, than this. I really don't think my Granddad has long left, and I have never thought such a devastating thing in my life :'(