Rant
So I was thinking, Dangerous, yes. The thought process have enlightened me to one of my lesser qualities: I don't ask for what I want. So that led to the burning question WHY? Why don't I ask for the things I want? That led me to respond, because I have a weight problem. Its not that I am overly obese, more on the chubby side of the spectrum. I am completely mobile and even quite a bit flexible (to most people's surprise) but I am not what the status quo thinks as thin. So is the weight problem the reason that I cut myself short of the things I want? I think so. I think its the reason that I can't tell a certain guy that I want more than friendship. Why I wonder if I deserve that promotion that will pay all my bills. Why I loose that self confidence and wonder where it went. Am I subconsciencly telling myself I am not worth it because I am fat? How many times will I allow this thinking to take away my happiness? I will now consider this before NOT taking that chance that I will regret not doing. So, yeah, I have had way too much time on my hands to be thinking about these things. What really started the rant is why hasn't anything happened between a certain guy and me. I usually let him make the first move and now I am re-evaluating my past mistakes. I think not approaching the guy is the thing that makes me not seal the deal. I mean, HELLO! blondie! how many times is this guy going to flirt with me this year and me not just make a move? Its weird, he has made many points to let parts of his general character "slip" out throughout '07, and gather info on me. So, that is what led to this rant. Any confidence boosters out there? Other thoughts? Hell, I'll even take questions. (yes I am being a feedback whore at this point) So let me know what you think.