A new direction
Tonight I attended my first Al-Anon meeting, based on a recommendation from my therapist.
Why did I wait so long?
Nearly all the issues that I find myself dealing with seem to be traced back to having an alcoholic father who walked out when I was 13. I spent a lot of my life thinking my real issues were about his leaving and not about the survival skills I developed as the son of an alcoholic.
I'm beginning to see I was wrong.
Reading the checklist on the Al-Anon website talking about behaviors that can be found in people who have lived with family members are alcoholics, I was blown away by how many times I saw myself. Eager to please, needing attention, blaming oneself, avoiding conflict, trying to fix things, wanting to make everyone happy, isolating oneself.
Now is where the next adventure begins...peeling away the layers and allowing myself to be open to all the things I've been protecting myself from for decades.
It's pretty scary on one hand, but on the other, the thought of working out all those demons and finally living my life fully aware and involved is very exciting.
Here I go!
Why did I wait so long?
Nearly all the issues that I find myself dealing with seem to be traced back to having an alcoholic father who walked out when I was 13. I spent a lot of my life thinking my real issues were about his leaving and not about the survival skills I developed as the son of an alcoholic.
I'm beginning to see I was wrong.
Reading the checklist on the Al-Anon website talking about behaviors that can be found in people who have lived with family members are alcoholics, I was blown away by how many times I saw myself. Eager to please, needing attention, blaming oneself, avoiding conflict, trying to fix things, wanting to make everyone happy, isolating oneself.
Now is where the next adventure begins...peeling away the layers and allowing myself to be open to all the things I've been protecting myself from for decades.
It's pretty scary on one hand, but on the other, the thought of working out all those demons and finally living my life fully aware and involved is very exciting.
Here I go!