But he never told anybody
Yeah, got back from karate a bit ago. Ill keep you in suspense. Write about it somewhere in the middle so you cant just skip down and read it. You might enjoy the read.
Ok school today. before the first class (midterms still). Im walkin in the halls talkin to tony, havin a good time. Then i see katie walking hand in hand with phil like 3 feet in front of me. Ill leave this paragraph at that, continue it with the karate one later ;-).
Tests werent insanely bad. Just walkin in the halls in between classes got to me. Hah im gonna look back at all this and laugh (also explained in a later paragraph). But why i keep myself from initiating conversation youll... probably understand but it sounds stupid unless its you so.
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Alright screw all that. After school i went home with brad (awesome kid, once again explained later). First we played PS2 like any 2 geeks would, then we looked on my journal. This one, like all the way back. We reread entries, literally laughed at all of them (like that time i sat under the bleachers at the football game or how marc started commenting in my journal and how it lead up to our talking now and stuff. And karategirl - who i started talking around october 14th i believe).
And get this. Amazingly i thought about Koula like.. 5 times today only. I think my allowing myself to talk to her again and apologizing to her and her boyfriend took off whatever stress i was putting on myself about it. Ill see if it continues like this, cuz if it does? oooooh yeah baby lol.
----------But brad and i were talkin about it today. What would i be like if i hadnt met her? Would i be like PSYCHO depressed or would I've turned out this way even without her? I mean theres no possible way of telling lol, my life couldve gone down two roads from that point. Guess one could only wonder...
Ok fine the good paragraph: Everything shall be explained. It all goes with eachother so i cant really orginize it in the 1,2,3 manner so sorry. Okay seeing Phil and katie. Just like that conflict with she1 during the beginning of last summer. Or karategirl tonight (who i found doesnt like me but is okay with my semi-liking her). After going through it, yknow knowing that i have things against me or how im chosen last over other guys? Does one of two things. Usually it makes me depressed, naturally. Right? So once in a while, itll get me happy. Dont ask me why, but just.. those one of every 10 or 20 times makes me realize that i can always retreat back to what i have. The couple friends that havent/wont leave me, like BRAD or carre and such. Settles me down. How i wish every time i saw other poeple i was like this. Beats the hell outta being sad, ill give you that.
And i called back tricia. I know she told me she hated me and didnt want me to ever call or talk to her but i did anyway. Figured that itd either A) let her know that im still the same guy ive always been (letting her not be upset), B) Confer the hatred, or C) Let me know if i should give her more time. Marcs been on my case about it too, lol, but not to put him down - sorry if it does - I did this on my own esteem. She didnt answer though. When i got back from karate her name was on my caller ID though, shed called back. I wonder if she wasnt home or just didnt pick up like shes been doin lately...
Ok school today. before the first class (midterms still). Im walkin in the halls talkin to tony, havin a good time. Then i see katie walking hand in hand with phil like 3 feet in front of me. Ill leave this paragraph at that, continue it with the karate one later ;-).
Tests werent insanely bad. Just walkin in the halls in between classes got to me. Hah im gonna look back at all this and laugh (also explained in a later paragraph). But why i keep myself from initiating conversation youll... probably understand but it sounds stupid unless its you so.
-----------
Alright screw all that. After school i went home with brad (awesome kid, once again explained later). First we played PS2 like any 2 geeks would, then we looked on my journal. This one, like all the way back. We reread entries, literally laughed at all of them (like that time i sat under the bleachers at the football game or how marc started commenting in my journal and how it lead up to our talking now and stuff. And karategirl - who i started talking around october 14th i believe).
And get this. Amazingly i thought about Koula like.. 5 times today only. I think my allowing myself to talk to her again and apologizing to her and her boyfriend took off whatever stress i was putting on myself about it. Ill see if it continues like this, cuz if it does? oooooh yeah baby lol.
----------But brad and i were talkin about it today. What would i be like if i hadnt met her? Would i be like PSYCHO depressed or would I've turned out this way even without her? I mean theres no possible way of telling lol, my life couldve gone down two roads from that point. Guess one could only wonder...
Ok fine the good paragraph: Everything shall be explained. It all goes with eachother so i cant really orginize it in the 1,2,3 manner so sorry. Okay seeing Phil and katie. Just like that conflict with she1 during the beginning of last summer. Or karategirl tonight (who i found doesnt like me but is okay with my semi-liking her). After going through it, yknow knowing that i have things against me or how im chosen last over other guys? Does one of two things. Usually it makes me depressed, naturally. Right? So once in a while, itll get me happy. Dont ask me why, but just.. those one of every 10 or 20 times makes me realize that i can always retreat back to what i have. The couple friends that havent/wont leave me, like BRAD or carre and such. Settles me down. How i wish every time i saw other poeple i was like this. Beats the hell outta being sad, ill give you that.
And i called back tricia. I know she told me she hated me and didnt want me to ever call or talk to her but i did anyway. Figured that itd either A) let her know that im still the same guy ive always been (letting her not be upset), B) Confer the hatred, or C) Let me know if i should give her more time. Marcs been on my case about it too, lol, but not to put him down - sorry if it does - I did this on my own esteem. She didnt answer though. When i got back from karate her name was on my caller ID though, shed called back. I wonder if she wasnt home or just didnt pick up like shes been doin lately...