sighs and grunts
So yeah
Ive been over here house sitting with my brother
and yeah
I slept all day yesterday
and I cant stop eating
so Ricky and I were together everyday since the day we met till the day I came over here
lol
we're having withdrawls
lol
but yeah
our first night apart he went to jail
ugh
and then the next night I was up cause I was waiting for him to call me and let me know he wasnt in jail again
yeah
he didnt go
but the cops are looking for him
hes not bad
his brother stole his car
like took it and put it in his name and got insurance and all that shit
so Ricky had him arrested for grand theft auto
and hes pressing charges
and I really dont know how this shit works out but his brother is out of jail
and the car was at his house
so Ricky and his other brother went and stole it
so now the cops are after him for grand theft auto
this shits too confusing
ugh
but yeah when he explains it it makes sense
so this morning he had to go to tampa and get a drug test and meet with his recruiter and all that shit
ugh
and he was going to come see me after
yeah his cell phone got cut off
so he called me and was like "ok well Im about to leave to go meet him and then Ill call you around 2 or 2 30 and get directions....go back to bed you lazy ass lol"
heh yeah
he makes fun of me cause I sleep all day
but yeah
so he called
and I woke up 10 mins later
so I dont even know
its almost 6 and I still havent heard from him and Im just like "fuck"
I figured I could just have him come later or what not
and my brohers working from 3 to 11 so Im here all alone and I dont like it
then mom called my cell phone and was like yeah Ill be there around 6 30
I just want to fucking cry
Im grounded
I cant see Ricky
and my mom is comming
I cant stand to be around my mom
I just want to ball my eyes out cause she never leaves me alone
and that means Ricky cant come no matter what time it is
and he was ganna stay the night too
FUCK
yeah
so I have all this school work to do before I can do anything or be ungrounded or anyof that shit
FUCK
Im ganna go look in a min and see whats goin on with my algebra shit and all that
Im almost just praying Im just kicked out of the course so I can just be left alone and just fuck off like a normal teenager does during the summer
UGH
yeah
that makes me want to cry to
I keep having nightmares
I went and got all my test results from the psychologist
I have a higher IQ than 80% of all people
everyone laughed when I told them
I dont understand
and Im at 12 grade math and reading level
SO WHY THE FUCK AM I STILL IN 9TH GRADE ALGEBRA
FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK
I just want to be with Ricky
hes like the only thing that can cheer me up other than drugs
and I just want him
I miss him
and Im just loosing my fucking mind
I hate my life
I wish I could just dissapear
I wish I could just skip all these fucking grades since my IQ is higher than all that shit
I want to crawl in a cave far far away from everything and die
and this is really weird cause Im just typing away and I didnt know I felt this way at all
I hate being me
Im ganna go see if Im kicked out of the course or not now and then eat more and smoke
then Ill probably sleep
cause this is all I ever do
such a waste of human
fuck
I want to be with Ricky
FUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUCK
I really dont know what else to say
so yeah
MUH
Ive been over here house sitting with my brother
and yeah
I slept all day yesterday
and I cant stop eating
so Ricky and I were together everyday since the day we met till the day I came over here
lol
we're having withdrawls
lol
but yeah
our first night apart he went to jail
ugh
and then the next night I was up cause I was waiting for him to call me and let me know he wasnt in jail again
yeah
he didnt go
but the cops are looking for him
hes not bad
his brother stole his car
like took it and put it in his name and got insurance and all that shit
so Ricky had him arrested for grand theft auto
and hes pressing charges
and I really dont know how this shit works out but his brother is out of jail
and the car was at his house
so Ricky and his other brother went and stole it
so now the cops are after him for grand theft auto
this shits too confusing
ugh
but yeah when he explains it it makes sense
so this morning he had to go to tampa and get a drug test and meet with his recruiter and all that shit
ugh
and he was going to come see me after
yeah his cell phone got cut off
so he called me and was like "ok well Im about to leave to go meet him and then Ill call you around 2 or 2 30 and get directions....go back to bed you lazy ass lol"
heh yeah
he makes fun of me cause I sleep all day
but yeah
so he called
and I woke up 10 mins later
so I dont even know
its almost 6 and I still havent heard from him and Im just like "fuck"
I figured I could just have him come later or what not
and my brohers working from 3 to 11 so Im here all alone and I dont like it
then mom called my cell phone and was like yeah Ill be there around 6 30
I just want to fucking cry
Im grounded
I cant see Ricky
and my mom is comming
I cant stand to be around my mom
I just want to ball my eyes out cause she never leaves me alone
and that means Ricky cant come no matter what time it is
and he was ganna stay the night too
FUCK
yeah
so I have all this school work to do before I can do anything or be ungrounded or anyof that shit
FUCK
Im ganna go look in a min and see whats goin on with my algebra shit and all that
Im almost just praying Im just kicked out of the course so I can just be left alone and just fuck off like a normal teenager does during the summer
UGH
yeah
that makes me want to cry to
I keep having nightmares
I went and got all my test results from the psychologist
I have a higher IQ than 80% of all people
everyone laughed when I told them
I dont understand
and Im at 12 grade math and reading level
SO WHY THE FUCK AM I STILL IN 9TH GRADE ALGEBRA
FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK
I just want to be with Ricky
hes like the only thing that can cheer me up other than drugs
and I just want him
I miss him
and Im just loosing my fucking mind
I hate my life
I wish I could just dissapear
I wish I could just skip all these fucking grades since my IQ is higher than all that shit
I want to crawl in a cave far far away from everything and die
and this is really weird cause Im just typing away and I didnt know I felt this way at all
I hate being me
Im ganna go see if Im kicked out of the course or not now and then eat more and smoke
then Ill probably sleep
cause this is all I ever do
such a waste of human
fuck
I want to be with Ricky
FUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUCK
I really dont know what else to say
so yeah
MUH