Episode Recap: Vector
Hello, my darlings. I hope the holidays are going swimmingly for you all. I know they've certainly been eventful for me! So much so that there's been a huge gap between recaps. Sorry about that. I'm not on hiatus and I'm not stopping or anything like that. It just took me a while to find five between my nephie-poos playing Half Life 2 on here to really sit down, relax, sip some strawberry champers and get into the funny. There are some pretty sweet screen caps in this lot! So funny, I don't need to even SAY anything. Oh, and this one is pretty image heavy! You've been warned! A special hello to my buddies at the forums at numb3rs.org! I love you all! *hugs*
Season 1
Episode Recap: Vector
*sing* I only knew you for a while, I never saw your smile. ’Til it was time to go, Time to go away (time to go away)
Day by daaaaay! Day by daaaay! Oh dear Lord! Three things I praaaay!
Owww...
Mom: Honey?
Awww, he's getting his first period..
You know you're in for an exciting episode when it starts with two check-out chicks talking about their day...
Mom: Come on, kid, you gotta keep on truckin'! You think I stop doing the housework just because I'm bleeding?
Blonde: So then, like, Joe down in fresh produce totally blanked her and left the pregnancy mags at her checkout. I mean, SHA!
Brunette: ZZZzzzz...
Wuh-oh...
Fuzzy pink filter... that means something BAD is happening! (Or they could *both* be getting their periods...)
Agent WoMan: We got sick people here. We need an expert to add up all the numbers. Big messy complicated numbers.
Don: Dude... do you even have a specific sex?
Agent WoMan: Is this bitch for real?
Terry: Oh yeah.
Agent WoMan: [sigh] Okay. I sent for someone totally qualified. So whoever your PMSing partner wants, tough.
Don: Oh, it's like that is it? Well, let's see how she-
Don: Wuh the fuh?
*Cue funky intro music*
Don: You?! Have you been playing FBIs behind my back!?
Charlie: What? No! Just NSAs.
ET: Beeeee Gooooood...
Don: There goes a brave God-damned alien...
Don shares with the rest of the department his favourite Prodigy song...
Don: Oh my GOD that's the FUNKY SHIT!
Sinclair is shocked. The boy got beat.
So yeah. People getting sick. Eek!
Terry seems to have crawled out of bed and into work, completely neglecting to do her hair.
Don: Cliiiiiiiimb every MOUNTAAAAAAAIN!
Don: Fooooord ev-ery STREAAAAAM!
Charlie likes colouring in the squares...
Yeah... Mondrian is on the case. This shit's solved already!
The box needs to say "Ye Holy Curls of Thud"
This diagram says that Charlie goes both ways...
Charlie is hunting for the wild Nacey... yes, yes he is... come find me Charlie! Keewit! Keeewiiit!!!
Don Eppes is too - damned - macho for YOU.
Don: I'll be right here... stay with me, ET- Er...
Sick!Lady: Staaaaaay... to-geh-therrrrr...
Don: ...
Heh. The Blonde wants to be Renee O'Connor so badly...
Charlie's writing his memoirs.
"... Darkly handsome youth, with bountiful curled coif and a terrible secret..."
Alan: Charlie... are you writing romance/action stories about yourself again?
Charlie: Aaaaaaah-
Charlie: No! Er... maybe.
Charlie: Can we not tell Don?
Don's walking the fuzzy blue-grey line. Hah. Alex Gansa. He down with his homies and his bi-otches, wearin' his colors, yo.
Owww. Brain hurty! *clutches skull* Make it go away!
Charlie fails to prove that he's the Son of God. See? Marker does not go through palm.
Heh. Charlie cute. (What's a recap without a random 'hot' Krumcap or two?)
O_O CHARLIE! What are you doing to SINCLAIR?! *bwahahha*
Charlie: Hey, Don! I was just wondering if you wanted to read the draft of my manuscript?
Don: Depends. Is it the one where you nail the international jewel thief, solve P vs NP and bed the beautiful multimillion dollar heiress from Spain?
Charlie: Yeah, but I improved it.
Don: How?
Charlie: I catch the jewel thief with the help of the calculation of Pi.
Don: Tell you what, I'll call Terry, see if she wants to read it.
Later...
Charlie: See, and then... and then I make love to Belladonna, cause, like... it's her father's dying wish that she find the love of her life...
Terry: You seriously want me to read that shit?
Don: OOOOH! BURNED!
Charlie: [sigh]
Ooh, Don's doin' a strip tease! Woohoo!
Charlie: Hey, asswipe!
Don: Cock-knocker!
Charlie: Butt-monkey!
Don: ...Mathematician!
Alan tries to get some Brows of Doom action going...
Alan: Did I get it?
Charlie: Sorry, no.
Alan: God, damn it!
Charlie: Don't worry. You're filling your niche of being eye candy for the over 40s.
Alan can live with that.
Alan: All right. I'm off for my Dieter Lessons. Ahnts! Ahnts! Ahnts!
Believe it or not, I'm not going to mock Rob here. This is actually - a gratuitous Rob cap. Yes, yes, a GRC!! He just happens to look incredibly tasty here. So yes. No caption. Just enjoy the pretty!
Heeeeere's JOHNNY!
Don: Heeey! Didn't I see you in Law and Order?
Flu!Guy: Probably...
Flu!Guy: I also moonlight as an unscrupulous newspaper editor with a bad toupé.
...
... I really don't want to know what they're comparing, here.
Action!Terry!
Don: Yo, who loves you, baby?
Terry: I dunno - wanna remind me?
Don: Da-yamn! You're askin' for a spell under the desk, woman!
Don: Anybody looking?
Terry: Nope.
Don: Let's go.
Don: Oh yeah... the Donster's on par!
Time to question some suspects!
Don: Dude, you might be a geek but that doesn't give you the right to look like that. Did you even shower this morning?
Med!Geek: Of course I showered! This stuff in my hair is product! This is a fashionable five o'clock shadow!
Don: On some people, I'm sure it is. You better spill with some alibi shiz or I'm confiscating your jazz records and your vouchers to that swanky little cafe you go to to talk about the theatre.
Med!Geek: I'm not telling you anything. And I know for a fact your little bro is way hairier than me.
Don: Yeah, but he never fell out of the fugly tree, either.
Med!Geek: ... you bitch.
Don and Charlie in the car on the way to somewhere important...
Don: Turd-burger...
Charlie: Palm pilot...
Don: Fuck knuckle...
Charlie: ...FBI Agent!
Don:...?
Charlie: ... I guess that doesn't really work, does it?
Larry's mother warned him that if he kept pulling that face and the wind changed, it'd stay like that. The man NEVER listened...
Sensei pulls stupid face while student seeks his sage advice.
Larry: Hey Charles, want to see something really funny?
Larry: I'm going to suck out your braaaayeens! Through your EAAARS!
Charlie: ... okay.
Dear GOD, boy! And they told me you were intelligent!
Charlie finds himself trapped in the cover of a Vertigo comic... He's totally being written by Neil Gaiman!
Charlie decides to be Posey McPosepants while Don has a go at being utterly gay.
Bug: Hey! Steve!
Bug2: Ralph! It's been years!
Bug: Turn of the century, right?
Bug2: Hey, aren't we supposed to be Spanish?
Bug: Shit. You're right. Uhm. Olé?
WAH! Uh... heh. That woman just doesn't stop being butch.
Chu-chuh--- CHEST HAIR!!!
DrGuy: Hello. I am a doctor from an evil universe.
DrGuy: We can send you our good Spanish flu bugs which will save you, because they're mirrored and they're good and they'll save you. They also have little beards like mine. As long as you send us back our evil Captain Kirk.
Don: No way. One Shatner is Just. NOT. Enough!
Ooh...
Convenient lighting...
Hmm, yes - is it hot in here?
Oh my...
Pensive, vulnerable... and shirt open!!
That's right. The last five pictures were just posted to admire the chest hair. Chest. Hair. Two words that get me into paroxyms of joy and delight, par-TIC-ularly if it's DK's chest hair. Phwoah. Yes indeed. And this is, by the way, one of my favourite scenes ever for the perving. I need chocolate, now.
Charlie and Agent WoMan have a competition to see who's manlier. Not surprisingly, Agent WoMan is winning.
CHEST HAIR!!! (Again. I fucking LOVE THIS EPISODE!)
Flu!Guy: Here, I brought you some slides. They should be educational.
Charlie: [moon] I shall love them and keep them and call them George!
Flu!Guy: Is your brother entirely sane?
Don: No. He's a mathematician.
Larry and his friends talk about the very fabric of the universe...
Larry: Now, if Angelina Jolie were a celestial body, she'd most definitely be a black hole... All must love her and despair.
Charlie: Hey Sensei.
(CHEST HAIR! Behind the glass - MOVE the fucking glass!!!)
Larry: Hey, not now. I'm discussing celestial bodies. Talk to the sexing fingers.
Don: Have we solved this bitching thing, yet?
Terry: Nope. We just have to rule out our prime suspect and set up the twist ending.
Don and Terry get heavy.
Don: Are you going to tell us stuff or do we have to suspend your internet connection?
Med!Geek: That doesn't frighten me.
Don: Hey... did you shave?
Med!Geek: Yeah, so?
Don: Makes absolutely no difference whatsoever.
Don: All right, I eat babies for breakfast and I'm pretty pissed off. You better tell me what's going on or I start singing show tunes!
Don: That's it! [sings] Don't tell me not to LIVE, just sit and putter!
Don: Life's candy and the SUN's a ball of BUTTAH!
Don: Who told you were allowed to RAIN on my PARAAAAAADE!
(All Babs jokes aside, Don - really, in the office? In front of Terry? What will the boss think?)
Med!Geek: All right, I'll talk! Just stop with the Streisand!!
Heh. Meanwhile at the hospital, we're gearing up for some drama. Don is feeling pretty good about himself.
*sniffle* Charlie!
Don: Yo, dude - you all right?
Charlie: Yeah, it's just... I'm due to reminisce about Mom dying and I feel like my maths is not enough...
Don: Oohhhh, right. Sure, dude, let the Sucks come, just let it out.
There is no caption better than the one I did when I made this pic into an icon... Awww, PUPPY!
Oh, Come to Nacey! Nestle your poor weary worried sad little head in my bosom and let me make it all better!
...
Heh... moving on...
Oh God... Mopey sad "I Suckage" AND Chest hair... Who needs porn when you have this Charlie goodness?
Uncertain... and chest hair. Anything and chest hair is good. It's - it's all about the CHEST HAIR, folks.
*snort-giggle*
Don: Ha-ha, you look totally stupid when you pull that face! Do it again!
Aaaah, GOD DAMN IT! He got CHANGED!!
WAAAH! *hides*
Sinclair: You think we can fit in any jokes about me? Come on - make fun of my head. You know you want to. Look how bald and shiny it is!
Don: OH dude, I LOVE this show! This is Punk'D, right? The lady is gonna sit down in her seat and jello is gonna fall from the luggage compartment right onto her head!
Woah, wait! Who are you? You're not my regular Mobile Phone Tracking Guy! You're not even attractive! Unattractive men aren't supposed to be tracking my villains! This WILL not DO!
Don: [sings over phone] And I can't help... falling in loooove wiiiith youuuuu.
Don: [heavy breathing] I'm wearing a g-string... what are you wearing? [pant pant]
Don: DUCK SEASON!
Flu!Guy is just looking forward to a gig where he's not stuck wearing a ridiculous bow-tie.
Don: HA! SNAP! We gotcha! Oh yeah, I'm THAT good!
Don, knocking back a brewski. He is just so damned macho. Is it getting you hot? Me? Naah. I'm still hung up on the Chest Hair.
Ohhh... the Chest hair. *swoon*
Do the Eppes ever eat anything other than soup and pasta?
Don: Bitch-tit.
Charlie: Scrote-coat.
Don: You're so immature.
Charlie: Cintus supremus!
Don: Zero charisma!
Charlie: Cintus supremus.
Don: Zero charisma.
Charlie: Cintus supremus...
Don: Zero charisma...
Aaah. There we go. Wasn't that a huge one? And the FINAL recap of 2005! This is the year that I discovered Numb3rs, and it's a show that's brought me so much joy and excitement. It's distracted me from nights of pain and given me pretty men to look at and to put on my desktop. It's also both acqainted me with the work of some talented actors, and reacquainted me with others. So here's to 2005 giving me a new joy, and for the new episodes 2006 continuing to delight.
Thank you for those who keep coming back and supporting me with my recaps. I really appreciate it. Special thanks to Hilary at http://numb3rs-online.org for your continuing support!
Season 1
Episode Recap: Vector
*sing* I only knew you for a while, I never saw your smile. ’Til it was time to go, Time to go away (time to go away)
Day by daaaaay! Day by daaaay! Oh dear Lord! Three things I praaaay!
Owww...
Mom: Honey?
Awww, he's getting his first period..
You know you're in for an exciting episode when it starts with two check-out chicks talking about their day...
Mom: Come on, kid, you gotta keep on truckin'! You think I stop doing the housework just because I'm bleeding?
Blonde: So then, like, Joe down in fresh produce totally blanked her and left the pregnancy mags at her checkout. I mean, SHA!
Brunette: ZZZzzzz...
Wuh-oh...
Fuzzy pink filter... that means something BAD is happening! (Or they could *both* be getting their periods...)
Agent WoMan: We got sick people here. We need an expert to add up all the numbers. Big messy complicated numbers.
Don: Dude... do you even have a specific sex?
Agent WoMan: Is this bitch for real?
Terry: Oh yeah.
Agent WoMan: [sigh] Okay. I sent for someone totally qualified. So whoever your PMSing partner wants, tough.
Don: Oh, it's like that is it? Well, let's see how she-
Don: Wuh the fuh?
*Cue funky intro music*
Don: You?! Have you been playing FBIs behind my back!?
Charlie: What? No! Just NSAs.
ET: Beeeee Gooooood...
Don: There goes a brave God-damned alien...
Don shares with the rest of the department his favourite Prodigy song...
Don: Oh my GOD that's the FUNKY SHIT!
Sinclair is shocked. The boy got beat.
So yeah. People getting sick. Eek!
Terry seems to have crawled out of bed and into work, completely neglecting to do her hair.
Don: Cliiiiiiiimb every MOUNTAAAAAAAIN!
Don: Fooooord ev-ery STREAAAAAM!
Charlie likes colouring in the squares...
Yeah... Mondrian is on the case. This shit's solved already!
The box needs to say "Ye Holy Curls of Thud"
This diagram says that Charlie goes both ways...
Charlie is hunting for the wild Nacey... yes, yes he is... come find me Charlie! Keewit! Keeewiiit!!!
Don Eppes is too - damned - macho for YOU.
Don: I'll be right here... stay with me, ET- Er...
Sick!Lady: Staaaaaay... to-geh-therrrrr...
Don: ...
Heh. The Blonde wants to be Renee O'Connor so badly...
Charlie's writing his memoirs.
"... Darkly handsome youth, with bountiful curled coif and a terrible secret..."
Alan: Charlie... are you writing romance/action stories about yourself again?
Charlie: Aaaaaaah-
Charlie: No! Er... maybe.
Charlie: Can we not tell Don?
Don's walking the fuzzy blue-grey line. Hah. Alex Gansa. He down with his homies and his bi-otches, wearin' his colors, yo.
Owww. Brain hurty! *clutches skull* Make it go away!
Charlie fails to prove that he's the Son of God. See? Marker does not go through palm.
Heh. Charlie cute. (What's a recap without a random 'hot' Krumcap or two?)
O_O CHARLIE! What are you doing to SINCLAIR?! *bwahahha*
Charlie: Hey, Don! I was just wondering if you wanted to read the draft of my manuscript?
Don: Depends. Is it the one where you nail the international jewel thief, solve P vs NP and bed the beautiful multimillion dollar heiress from Spain?
Charlie: Yeah, but I improved it.
Don: How?
Charlie: I catch the jewel thief with the help of the calculation of Pi.
Don: Tell you what, I'll call Terry, see if she wants to read it.
Later...
Charlie: See, and then... and then I make love to Belladonna, cause, like... it's her father's dying wish that she find the love of her life...
Terry: You seriously want me to read that shit?
Don: OOOOH! BURNED!
Charlie: [sigh]
Ooh, Don's doin' a strip tease! Woohoo!
Charlie: Hey, asswipe!
Don: Cock-knocker!
Charlie: Butt-monkey!
Don: ...Mathematician!
Alan tries to get some Brows of Doom action going...
Alan: Did I get it?
Charlie: Sorry, no.
Alan: God, damn it!
Charlie: Don't worry. You're filling your niche of being eye candy for the over 40s.
Alan can live with that.
Alan: All right. I'm off for my Dieter Lessons. Ahnts! Ahnts! Ahnts!
Believe it or not, I'm not going to mock Rob here. This is actually - a gratuitous Rob cap. Yes, yes, a GRC!! He just happens to look incredibly tasty here. So yes. No caption. Just enjoy the pretty!
Heeeeere's JOHNNY!
Don: Heeey! Didn't I see you in Law and Order?
Flu!Guy: Probably...
Flu!Guy: I also moonlight as an unscrupulous newspaper editor with a bad toupé.
...
... I really don't want to know what they're comparing, here.
Action!Terry!
Don: Yo, who loves you, baby?
Terry: I dunno - wanna remind me?
Don: Da-yamn! You're askin' for a spell under the desk, woman!
Don: Anybody looking?
Terry: Nope.
Don: Let's go.
Don: Oh yeah... the Donster's on par!
Time to question some suspects!
Don: Dude, you might be a geek but that doesn't give you the right to look like that. Did you even shower this morning?
Med!Geek: Of course I showered! This stuff in my hair is product! This is a fashionable five o'clock shadow!
Don: On some people, I'm sure it is. You better spill with some alibi shiz or I'm confiscating your jazz records and your vouchers to that swanky little cafe you go to to talk about the theatre.
Med!Geek: I'm not telling you anything. And I know for a fact your little bro is way hairier than me.
Don: Yeah, but he never fell out of the fugly tree, either.
Med!Geek: ... you bitch.
Don and Charlie in the car on the way to somewhere important...
Don: Turd-burger...
Charlie: Palm pilot...
Don: Fuck knuckle...
Charlie: ...FBI Agent!
Don:...?
Charlie: ... I guess that doesn't really work, does it?
Larry's mother warned him that if he kept pulling that face and the wind changed, it'd stay like that. The man NEVER listened...
Sensei pulls stupid face while student seeks his sage advice.
Larry: Hey Charles, want to see something really funny?
Larry: I'm going to suck out your braaaayeens! Through your EAAARS!
Charlie: ... okay.
Dear GOD, boy! And they told me you were intelligent!
Charlie finds himself trapped in the cover of a Vertigo comic... He's totally being written by Neil Gaiman!
Charlie decides to be Posey McPosepants while Don has a go at being utterly gay.
Bug: Hey! Steve!
Bug2: Ralph! It's been years!
Bug: Turn of the century, right?
Bug2: Hey, aren't we supposed to be Spanish?
Bug: Shit. You're right. Uhm. Olé?
WAH! Uh... heh. That woman just doesn't stop being butch.
Chu-chuh--- CHEST HAIR!!!
DrGuy: Hello. I am a doctor from an evil universe.
DrGuy: We can send you our good Spanish flu bugs which will save you, because they're mirrored and they're good and they'll save you. They also have little beards like mine. As long as you send us back our evil Captain Kirk.
Don: No way. One Shatner is Just. NOT. Enough!
Ooh...
Convenient lighting...
Hmm, yes - is it hot in here?
Oh my...
Pensive, vulnerable... and shirt open!!
That's right. The last five pictures were just posted to admire the chest hair. Chest. Hair. Two words that get me into paroxyms of joy and delight, par-TIC-ularly if it's DK's chest hair. Phwoah. Yes indeed. And this is, by the way, one of my favourite scenes ever for the perving. I need chocolate, now.
Charlie and Agent WoMan have a competition to see who's manlier. Not surprisingly, Agent WoMan is winning.
CHEST HAIR!!! (Again. I fucking LOVE THIS EPISODE!)
Flu!Guy: Here, I brought you some slides. They should be educational.
Charlie: [moon] I shall love them and keep them and call them George!
Flu!Guy: Is your brother entirely sane?
Don: No. He's a mathematician.
Larry and his friends talk about the very fabric of the universe...
Larry: Now, if Angelina Jolie were a celestial body, she'd most definitely be a black hole... All must love her and despair.
Charlie: Hey Sensei.
(CHEST HAIR! Behind the glass - MOVE the fucking glass!!!)
Larry: Hey, not now. I'm discussing celestial bodies. Talk to the sexing fingers.
Don: Have we solved this bitching thing, yet?
Terry: Nope. We just have to rule out our prime suspect and set up the twist ending.
Don and Terry get heavy.
Don: Are you going to tell us stuff or do we have to suspend your internet connection?
Med!Geek: That doesn't frighten me.
Don: Hey... did you shave?
Med!Geek: Yeah, so?
Don: Makes absolutely no difference whatsoever.
Don: All right, I eat babies for breakfast and I'm pretty pissed off. You better tell me what's going on or I start singing show tunes!
Don: That's it! [sings] Don't tell me not to LIVE, just sit and putter!
Don: Life's candy and the SUN's a ball of BUTTAH!
Don: Who told you were allowed to RAIN on my PARAAAAAADE!
(All Babs jokes aside, Don - really, in the office? In front of Terry? What will the boss think?)
Med!Geek: All right, I'll talk! Just stop with the Streisand!!
Heh. Meanwhile at the hospital, we're gearing up for some drama. Don is feeling pretty good about himself.
*sniffle* Charlie!
Don: Yo, dude - you all right?
Charlie: Yeah, it's just... I'm due to reminisce about Mom dying and I feel like my maths is not enough...
Don: Oohhhh, right. Sure, dude, let the Sucks come, just let it out.
There is no caption better than the one I did when I made this pic into an icon... Awww, PUPPY!
Oh, Come to Nacey! Nestle your poor weary worried sad little head in my bosom and let me make it all better!
...
Heh... moving on...
Oh God... Mopey sad "I Suckage" AND Chest hair... Who needs porn when you have this Charlie goodness?
Uncertain... and chest hair. Anything and chest hair is good. It's - it's all about the CHEST HAIR, folks.
*snort-giggle*
Don: Ha-ha, you look totally stupid when you pull that face! Do it again!
Aaaah, GOD DAMN IT! He got CHANGED!!
WAAAH! *hides*
Sinclair: You think we can fit in any jokes about me? Come on - make fun of my head. You know you want to. Look how bald and shiny it is!
Don: OH dude, I LOVE this show! This is Punk'D, right? The lady is gonna sit down in her seat and jello is gonna fall from the luggage compartment right onto her head!
Woah, wait! Who are you? You're not my regular Mobile Phone Tracking Guy! You're not even attractive! Unattractive men aren't supposed to be tracking my villains! This WILL not DO!
Don: [sings over phone] And I can't help... falling in loooove wiiiith youuuuu.
Don: [heavy breathing] I'm wearing a g-string... what are you wearing? [pant pant]
Don: DUCK SEASON!
Flu!Guy is just looking forward to a gig where he's not stuck wearing a ridiculous bow-tie.
Don: HA! SNAP! We gotcha! Oh yeah, I'm THAT good!
Don, knocking back a brewski. He is just so damned macho. Is it getting you hot? Me? Naah. I'm still hung up on the Chest Hair.
Ohhh... the Chest hair. *swoon*
Do the Eppes ever eat anything other than soup and pasta?
Don: Bitch-tit.
Charlie: Scrote-coat.
Don: You're so immature.
Charlie: Cintus supremus!
Don: Zero charisma!
Charlie: Cintus supremus.
Don: Zero charisma.
Charlie: Cintus supremus...
Don: Zero charisma...
Aaah. There we go. Wasn't that a huge one? And the FINAL recap of 2005! This is the year that I discovered Numb3rs, and it's a show that's brought me so much joy and excitement. It's distracted me from nights of pain and given me pretty men to look at and to put on my desktop. It's also both acqainted me with the work of some talented actors, and reacquainted me with others. So here's to 2005 giving me a new joy, and for the new episodes 2006 continuing to delight.
Thank you for those who keep coming back and supporting me with my recaps. I really appreciate it. Special thanks to Hilary at http://numb3rs-online.org for your continuing support!