(no subject)
I'm in a great situation right now but I can't seem to make myself feel good about it.
I'm in college, I have my own space, I'm in an amazing long term relationship with a person that I truly love, I have a very easy well paying job with my mom, and I have more free time than I've ever had before. I should feel honored to have all of this but for some reason i just can't.
Maybe it's because I'm in the same place I've been all my life, maybe it's because of the non-existent relationship between my brother and my parents... Maybe it's because I feel like I could have accomplished more than this. Whatever the reason, I just can't shake this feeling and it's really bringing me down. I want to go somewhere, I need a vacation far far away from here.
I've been seriously considering studying abroad, the problem is that i don't have a major yet. I have no idea what the future holds for me... That could be an explanation for my uneasiness. I can't seem to figure out what a want to do with my life.
I don't miss high school at all, but there are a few relationships that I really wish were mendable. The happiest time of my life was sophomore year, which is ironic because going into it I was expecting it to be the worst. I somehow managed to find a group of people that I really connected to, half of whom I'm not even on speaking terms with now.
My brother is a father now, I guess that makes me an aunt. Aunt Sara, I like that sound of that. Abraham Richard Tolemayo Padgett is the most adorable baby I've ever seen.
I'm at a standstill right now, I can't figure out what's wrong with me.
I'm in college, I have my own space, I'm in an amazing long term relationship with a person that I truly love, I have a very easy well paying job with my mom, and I have more free time than I've ever had before. I should feel honored to have all of this but for some reason i just can't.
Maybe it's because I'm in the same place I've been all my life, maybe it's because of the non-existent relationship between my brother and my parents... Maybe it's because I feel like I could have accomplished more than this. Whatever the reason, I just can't shake this feeling and it's really bringing me down. I want to go somewhere, I need a vacation far far away from here.
I've been seriously considering studying abroad, the problem is that i don't have a major yet. I have no idea what the future holds for me... That could be an explanation for my uneasiness. I can't seem to figure out what a want to do with my life.
I don't miss high school at all, but there are a few relationships that I really wish were mendable. The happiest time of my life was sophomore year, which is ironic because going into it I was expecting it to be the worst. I somehow managed to find a group of people that I really connected to, half of whom I'm not even on speaking terms with now.
My brother is a father now, I guess that makes me an aunt. Aunt Sara, I like that sound of that. Abraham Richard Tolemayo Padgett is the most adorable baby I've ever seen.
I'm at a standstill right now, I can't figure out what's wrong with me.