Feeling lost
well tonigh tis just been wierd for me I feel like a bad person cause I have done a lot of fucked up shit to other people and mainly to myself now where as alot of the things I have done were out of anger or because I felt like self mutilation it still makes you think you know it's like what the fuck Nick what the hell where you thinking on that one where the hell was your brain there right so yes I am upset with me and I know there is nothing I can do to make up for these things I really don't care about much of anything anymore it's like I am going numb to the world and the people in itlike I don't feel anything at all anymore cept for boredom and I don't think this is a good thing for me to do not feel anything I mean I look at my pictures of my son and I feel the world for him but thats it I have been out at my dads house all day and I can't say that I am really attatched to anyone out here well more or less that I am welcome as a formality I know they love me out here and care about me but I just don't see it in them I've hardly ever heard it from them well excluding my little brother Casey maybe I am just depressed but I just don't care anymore