I Wouldn't Want To Tear You Apart
Okay, so I just watched Croatoan for the second time and now I feel like maybe I can actually verbalise what I want to say.
I don't think I have been this affected by an episode of TV for so long. I'm thinking back and the only thing I can recall recently is the Alias series finale. And before that, Buffy.
Just thinking about it, I'm teary. They both OWNED me in this episode. Jensen and Jared both gave fucking fantastic performances. In fact, for Jared, I think this was the chance he's been waiting on for a long time now, a chance to really fucking own it and break down and show just how SCARED Sam is, but also what he is prepared to give up for Dean. Sam? Not selfish. Not in any way, shape or form.
When he basically begged for Dean to leave, that he would rather SHOOT HIMSELF than infect his brother? God. I just. I'm crying again, dammit. And yeah, when the infected!nurse said she'd been wanting to get Sam alone since she saw him? Yeah, stand in line, BIATCH!
Onto Dean. Jensen was wonderful. God how I believed him when he said he was tired of it. That it was a weight on him. My heart ached for him then and God, you could just see how weary he was, how resigned he was and how NOTHING is more important in the world than Sam. He lives (and dies) for that boy and I can't. even. He wants Sam and him to go away, to just be normal guys and fucking escape this destiny that Sam has. And he has to tell him what that destiny is because it is KILLING HIM to keep it inside.
Fucking Kripke.
And god, this song I am listening to is the most depressing song EVER. It is putting all sorts of Wincesty thoughts into my head. ::sniff::
I don't think I have been this affected by an episode of TV for so long. I'm thinking back and the only thing I can recall recently is the Alias series finale. And before that, Buffy.
Just thinking about it, I'm teary. They both OWNED me in this episode. Jensen and Jared both gave fucking fantastic performances. In fact, for Jared, I think this was the chance he's been waiting on for a long time now, a chance to really fucking own it and break down and show just how SCARED Sam is, but also what he is prepared to give up for Dean. Sam? Not selfish. Not in any way, shape or form.
When he basically begged for Dean to leave, that he would rather SHOOT HIMSELF than infect his brother? God. I just. I'm crying again, dammit. And yeah, when the infected!nurse said she'd been wanting to get Sam alone since she saw him? Yeah, stand in line, BIATCH!
Onto Dean. Jensen was wonderful. God how I believed him when he said he was tired of it. That it was a weight on him. My heart ached for him then and God, you could just see how weary he was, how resigned he was and how NOTHING is more important in the world than Sam. He lives (and dies) for that boy and I can't. even. He wants Sam and him to go away, to just be normal guys and fucking escape this destiny that Sam has. And he has to tell him what that destiny is because it is KILLING HIM to keep it inside.
Fucking Kripke.
And god, this song I am listening to is the most depressing song EVER. It is putting all sorts of Wincesty thoughts into my head. ::sniff::