(Untitled)

[mschneider]

PLAYER DETAILS
Name (or alias): Meegs
LJ: mschneider
Email: isntthisfun@gmail.com
AIM SN: optional

Comments

PENDING

[np_dumbledore]

Several questions for you

Re: PENDING

[mschneider]

I've made a bunch of edits to the application. I used strike out on certain lines/paragraphs and bolded the additions to the application. I've taken the possessive bit out altogether after deciding it doesn't really fit with the character after all. I also took out the bit about him being lazy. I may have misrepresented the amount of studiousness in him? He's hardworking when it comes to schoolwork, he just doesn't take any particular joy in doing it. I edited the app to, hopefully, explain that properly. Also edited the personality section.

Let me know if there's anything I missed/didn't clarify/need to change/etc.

Re: PENDING

[np_dumbledore]

That app is looking much better. I'm confused by these lines:

While their family was nowhere close to rich, some might have considered them at least comfortable as far as getting most of the things they wanted. Even if sometimes it required a bit of creative savings and cutting a few costs here and there. For example, Felix started taking dance lessons at the age of three. Even if the lessons weren't all that complicated until a few years down the road.

His dancing is at least mentioned now but I'm still not sure how it effects him. Plus, the way it's tied in above just threw me. If they're tight on money is the point that they sacrificed to give the kids things they wanted in spite of it or what? And...expand more on the dancing or explain why he takes it and how it's important to him. Clarify that and you should be good to go.

Re: PENDING

[carlisler]

Baaaasically he takes dancing because he's pretty much been interested in it from a young age. It's fun. He enjoys it. It's not exactly something he's going to do as a CAREER or anything like that, but it's pretty much his main hobby. Some people are into art, some are into dance.

They're tight on money, but they basically just budget it and try and cut the costs where they can so that they can give the kids extras things that they want. Likeeee the dance lessons for Felix, or an iPod for Lexi, or piano lessons for Missy. They try to give their kids the things they want despite the fact that they aren't the richest folk around.

That explain it enough...?

APPROVED

[np_dumbledore]

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