My name...
My name is Samuel, is hebrew for God Heard.
The name that is better, Kelevra, is hebrew for Bad Dog.
Over the break, I really put my mind to the task of figuring out all of my problems, finding the flaws in my personality and mind that have caused all of the trouble I've experienced. Under the recommendation of my youth minister, I read a book which he told me would explain a lot, and then we would talk about it. After reading it, my eyes seemed to be opened to everything.
Basically it proved I'm miserable.
Like a bad dog.
A bad dog is a mean, vicious animal, with no attachements to anything. It will attack any who come with in its territory. They fight anything that looks equal or stronger, as if only to prove they could. They are extremely paranoid, distrusting anything that could be a sign or a signal of attack. Authority only annoys them, and they'll do anything to prove they are the ones in control. When approached, they bristle, baring fangs, keeping anything at bay.
They always return alone: wounded, beaten, and bloody, no comfort waiting for them, no solace, just a quick rest before it all happens again.
And you've seen them. All kinds of them really. On the news, in the papers, in stories, urban legends.
They are truly the most miserable creatures.
And I'm just like them.
But I don't want to be. I want to be tamed. I want things to change.
And I'm not sure they ever will.
The name that is better, Kelevra, is hebrew for Bad Dog.
Over the break, I really put my mind to the task of figuring out all of my problems, finding the flaws in my personality and mind that have caused all of the trouble I've experienced. Under the recommendation of my youth minister, I read a book which he told me would explain a lot, and then we would talk about it. After reading it, my eyes seemed to be opened to everything.
Basically it proved I'm miserable.
Like a bad dog.
A bad dog is a mean, vicious animal, with no attachements to anything. It will attack any who come with in its territory. They fight anything that looks equal or stronger, as if only to prove they could. They are extremely paranoid, distrusting anything that could be a sign or a signal of attack. Authority only annoys them, and they'll do anything to prove they are the ones in control. When approached, they bristle, baring fangs, keeping anything at bay.
They always return alone: wounded, beaten, and bloody, no comfort waiting for them, no solace, just a quick rest before it all happens again.
And you've seen them. All kinds of them really. On the news, in the papers, in stories, urban legends.
They are truly the most miserable creatures.
And I'm just like them.
But I don't want to be. I want to be tamed. I want things to change.
And I'm not sure they ever will.