[Fan Fiction] Always and Never the Same (1/?)
「Title」: Always and Never the Same
「Author」: novlomien
「Chapters」: 1/?
「Fandom」: J-Rock
「Characters」: Reita, OC, the GazettE
「Genre」: Angst, General, Slight AU
「Warning」: Some language
「Rating」: R (to be safe)
「Word Count」: 3,784
「Synopsis」: The true story behind Reita’s noseband...
「Author’s Notes」: This is a story I started early last year and have yet to finish but I need to start posting it. This is a chaptered fic. This story is slightly AU so please bear with me. It’s written how it is so if you don’t like it, go read something else; I’m not changing it for anyone else just because it has big words in it or you don't like it. This story means a lot to me so I don't need your judging.
Disclaimer: Don't own the GazettE, only the original character, don't sue. This is a work of fiction and should be read as such.
►Previous Chapters:
.:.(Prologue)
Many years ago…
A few male sparrows hiding neatly beneath the lush leaves of the trees sang a beautifully crafted song deep within their tiny bodies. The trills echoed softly within the lush environment as the inviting breeze made its presence known throughout the blades of grass and foliage all around the inhabited town. The wind brought out a number of figures who had been hiding from the previous weather conditions and were taking a stroll along the sidewalks as they passed by small shops. A few couples could be seen enjoying the day as they clutched the arm of their loved one while they took their time to relish in the sunshine.
Though this was a rare day to be enjoyed, the occupants in the tiny studio hardly knew of the beauty that was waiting for them. The front doors were opened just enough to let the fresh air in as it raced down the narrow tiled hallways. Framed pictures of artists plastered on the wooden walls represented the gratification of those who had used the building’s services before. A few authority figures who were cleaned and pressed had a cup of coffee in hand as they engaged in business discussion. Even though the incessant chatter of excitement and voices of outlook seemed to overpower the men’s conversation, they continued to converse with themselves without hesitation.
The group in the studio was having a much needed break after being in the enclosed area for many hours trying to perfect their latest single and enjoying a take out meal. Most of them were already school buddies and it showed how comfortable they were with each other. It wasn’t too long ago that they had signed with Matina Records but after one single and a few videos later, they had already replaced a member and signed with a new label. The procedures of a band are not always easy. The path to strive for perfection and agreeability is always present for a great first impression and mobility; force behind the music is never enough if the proper promotion and function are not there.
Upon first glance, you could see the fair face of Aoi with his long sleek charcoal locks. He flicked his head so that the few strands that were falling towards his eyes were thrown back slightly. The youthful features on his face were striking and his contagious smile was accentuated by two bottom lip rings. Uruha was sitting next to the fellow musician, with the delicate features of a fair maiden enhanced with salient almond eyes that could stop anyone in their tracks. Being the chief member that enjoyed the pleasure of alcohol, Uruha bickered with the other guitarist as they fought over the last swig of the sweet drink. Aoi gingerly tugged on the other man’s dirty blonde tresses knowing that would stop him from prevailing. Uruha yelped mellifluously while Aoi’s outstretched hand grasped the neck of the bottle and quickly swilled the burning drink.
The always discernible Kai, with his seemingly untamable ebony hair, sat between the pouting Uruha and the group’s vocalist. His mouth formed a wide, dorky smile as he chuckled at the sight of his friends going at it over something so miniscule. The cheery drummer strived to bring the positive energy to the group now that he was recently dubbed leader after the departure of the original drummer; he had the challenge of changing his persona to a more proactive approach. The vocalist, Ruki, watched what was going on around him with a small smirk that made his delicate cheeks distend faintly. As if having toyed with the Kool-Aid, a few parts of his soft short hair were covered with an astounding ruby color weaved with his naturally raven hair. Sipping on some hot tea, he tried to keep his talking to a minimum in order to save his singing voice. Gold jewelry from his lobes sparkled gently in the artificial light that matched the trinkets around his neck and wrists.
Trying not to show a grin across his serious face, Reita was next to the vocalist as he only observed. Sporting a blonde, grown out mop-top style haircut that highlighted his honeyed ivory features, he glanced around at the lively discussions that his band members were having as he tentatively ate his food. Not entirely seeing it himself, the man’s eclipsed eyes, rotund nose, and prominent mouth enhanced the bassist’s natural exquisiteness. And like a lot of individuals, he was the reserved type who would watch from afar most of the time as his band mates joked with one another. It was not like they fooled around all the time though, when it came down to what they loved doing, it was as if it was a complete turnaround. Concentration and complete focus were initiated solely towards their craft. Though he would never admit it, this is when Reita felt the most comfortable. When he was immersed with his instrument, playing the deep tones as they hummed from his fingers throughout the rest of his body, it was a feeling of freeing and familiarity.
Seeing how quiet his fellow band member was being, Aoi took it upon himself to steal the remaining items off of Reita’s plate. Giving him a crooked smile of victory, he inserted the said pieces into his parted pierced mouth. Reita saw this immediately and turned his head up towards the guitarist with a glare. He knew he was only doing that to make him react so that he wasn’t silent for much longer. The bassist gave in and threw a look of warning to satiate the immaturity that was exhuming from the fellow member. He then pushed his plate away lightly as he rested his arms against the table while the center of the discussions rolled around to some of the tracks that they had just tried out.
“I think it sounds good the way it is,” Reita voiced his opinion briefly, his unique velvet voice matched the tones of the instrument he played. His hand gestured lightly as the few rings on his digits gleamed temporarily in the artificial lights.
“The beat doesn’t seem right, I think we should take the tempo up a bit,” Kai revealed, uncertainty laced within his voice.
“You say that about all the upbeat songs,” Ruki mentioned, stealing a bit more of food in the center of the table with his chopsticks then lightly added. “You know what those songs do to me, you’ll have me sounding like a screaming banshee at the end of every show, you know.”
“Don’t lie, you know you enjoy it,” Uruha mentioned with a wink.
“So it’s settled, faster tempo it is,” Kai stated casually with a giddy smile. Aoi turned his attention to the fellow member.
“Hey, since when did we cast the vote?” Aoi asked teasingly, raising an eyebrow at the leader.
“About a few minutes ago, you weren’t paying attention,” Ruki joked before placing another piece of food in his mouth with a grin.
“Yeah Aoi-kun, your sleepless nights are catching up to you,” Uruha joined in on the fun. “Focus!”
Aoi threw a small piece of food at his band mate while Uruha saw the action quickly and raised a defensive hand to stop the flying object. The air between the members was filled with good humor to clear the uncertainties that may have been floating previously.
Afterwards, they cleared the table and made sure that no offending items were left behind and sat down around the table once more to engage in a serious conversation. Getting comfortable in their own ways, whether by crossing their legs or leaning back in their chairs, they delved into the discussion of the recently recorded songs once more. Significant discussions took place but there was always the occasional friendly banter between the friends.
~*~
The long hours in the studio took a slight toll on the members as the evening was late. A few of them had already left, realizing that their creativity needed a deserved break. The change in the atmosphere was present as Aoi and Reita packed up, the silence between the two endured as they continued. Reita stood up from being bent over so long and felt the strain in his back. Immediately, he noticed that the fellow member had already finished gathering his belongings. The bassist’s lips pursed together when the guitarist wasn’t looking as he figured the fellow musician should just go on his way already.
“You can go ahead, I’m leaving soon after I get my stuff together,” Reita mentioned, wrapping a lengthy cord around the adaptor in his hands. He felt bad by the fact that he didn’t pack up sooner and he didn’t want his band mate to feel that he had to wait up for him; though he didn’t let that show on his face once. Aoi gazed at him as his lips formed a hesitant smirk.
“Are you sure? I don’t mind,” Aoi told him. Initially, he wasn’t bothered by the fact that he had to wait up for him. As much trouble as the tiny guitarist caused, he really had the friendliest personality, though it didn’t always show. Unfortunately, a small yawn escaped his lips to call him out on his fatigue. Reita chuckled lightly finding that to be the cue that the other man needed well deserved rest.
“You’re tired, go home and get what little sleep you can,” he mentioned. Aoi nodded and hitched up the heavy equipment towards his lean shoulder so that he could distribute the weight better. As he neared the door, Reita decided to remind him of the inevitable the next day.
“We’ve got a full day ahead of us tomorrow with that schedule our managers came up with.” A small whine came from the belly of the guitarist as he threw his head back in dramatics, definitely not something he wanted to be reminded of. He stood there briefly as if stalling would make tomorrow suddenly go away. With a short nod, Aoi made his way outside and closed the door behind him.
With a click of the lock, Reita closed the door behind him and was greeted with the cool, fresh air that the city had to offer. Darkness embodied the surrounding area as the world seemed to be at a standstill at this time of night. The shadows on the walls of the buildings seemed to dance in the streetlights, giving a sense of a creepy ambiance to the neighborhood. Reita wasn’t too afraid for he had been there many times before and followed his designated route. The streets were littered with remnants of paper trash that seemed to dance in the breeze against the dampened ground. The shuffling of his shoes echoed softly through the quiet streets as he grasped his belongings firmly within his strong fingers.
A while later, Reita made his way towards a familiar home that was near his own apartment. He realized it was late but he figured that it wouldn’t be much of a problem. As he instinctively followed the darkened pathway to the front door, he quickened his steps as he came closer to the entrance. Balancing the objects in his hands and the keys that he had pulled out of his pocket, he found the right one to use on the rusty lock. He turned the knob and gracefully entered the home. Stepping over the threshold and into the musty home, he took in the familiar scent that he was so used to greeting him. The living area was encased in a soft illumination that reflected multiple flickering candles due to the old wiring. It was an eerie feeling for people who had never been in there before because of how quiet and untouched it seemed. Placing his items beside the door, his feet made their way through the ghostly room as they bounced delicately on the plush chocolate carpet towards the destined room. He knocked lightly on the door with a single bent finger, trying to not be so surprising to the person on the other side. Without waiting for a response, he opened the door gingerly; his eyes focused on the elderly woman lying on a twin bed, propped up by a few fluffy pillows, and reading a thick book that she was halfway through. The age was present on her features, soft and delicate wrinkles were etched into her face and hands. The short silver hair she possessed was thinning but still accentuated her beauty. She turned her attention to the figure that was standing in the doorway and beamed upon recognizing who it was.
“Akira-chan.”
Nakajima Sakura was an elder friend that Reita had known for as long as he could remember. She lived a solitary life which suited her needs. It allowed her to be independent and have an outlook on life that no one else seemed to possess. She became a second mother to him as she strived to help release the potential in what he loved to do. Growing up with a strict family, Reita always had trouble trying to find himself and she helped him to blossom his talents.
It was a devastating day when he learned that she had developed cancer. As much as she went for treatment and anything else the doctor prescribed, it was still not enough for the malignant cells had progressed. Her positive outlook was the only thing keeping her going as the horrible disease continued to spread. He knew of this and tried to be at her side as much as he could. Any time there was a break, he would go to visit her not as a sense of duty, but as a sense of quiet obligation for this woman’s encouragement throughout the years. It became a natural habit simply because of her kindness and her seemingly infinite knowledge of advice and support.
No one in Reita’s circle of friends knew of her, not even the closest ones he called his band mates. There was just no room for understanding. It wasn’t so much a matter of trust; it was more towards a matter of keeping the dramatics away from the band. It was hard enough for them to even get as far as they were at that moment and he wanted to keep them on the roll with nothing to hold them back. The band didn’t need the constant worry or strain that he had to take on his shoulders already. He also saw it as being weak whenever he had troubles; he knew he couldn’t bring them up with the guys without being ridiculed for it. Having emotional ties to a mother figure would have been death to his already formed nature with them; he was the tougher one, the one with nothing that could break him down, a “bad boy” with a seemingly uncaring desire. And more than ever, he wanted to keep it that way because it was winning him respect.
Seeing her health fall a little bit each time he saw her, as much as it pained him, he tried not to let it get to him so much. He wanted her days to be as happy as they could be. It was the only thing he could do for everything she had done and continued to do for him. Her smile was genuine and always contagious. He would find himself grinning even when he felt that the whole world was against him.
“I didn’t think you’d be up this late,” Reita mentioned, letting himself in when he saw her friendly smile. The slight chill in the small room created a tinge that followed up his spine briefly knowing how the elder enjoyed the wintry ambiance.
“I slept all day since I came home from the hospital,” Sakura mentioned. Reita’s eyes winced naturally but wiped it off as quickly while he turned to her.
“I’m glad you’re home,” he relayed, bringing a rickety chair towards her bedside and taking a seat on it. When he sat down upon it, he accidentally let the wall down momentarily before he glanced upon the woman.
“How have you been Akira-chan? You look especially tired today,” she asked, concern evident in her voice as she tilted her head slightly to emphasize her growing worry. His gaze was of a slight guilt, as he wasn’t sure if he should bring up any worries with her especially when she had a hard day of recovery from the treatments they were giving her lately.
“I’m okay, just…” he trailed off a bit as he gathered his thoughts. Normally, he wasn’t one to admit that concerns gradually crossed his mind. “There have been a lot of changes to the band recently and I’m not sure how it’s going at the moment.”
“You boys have had to endure a lot of letdowns. Becoming successful in the music business is very hard indeed,” she mentioned, knowing from his previous stories that they were having a tough time even getting signed.
“Sometimes I wonder if this is really what I want,” he revealed softly, doubt laced within his voice as he admitted it aloud. Naturally, his head bowed down in a shameful way, feeling culpable for even admitting that much.
“Such doubts will weigh on your mind when you are the most vulnerable,” she related to him with a gentle smile, even though he didn’t see her expression. “I know how much music plays a part in your life. I don’t want to see you give it up without a fight.”
Delicately, she placed a shaky hand beneath his chin as she gently forced his head up to look at her. His almond eyes flickered towards hers, glistening in the dim light as his heart pounded slightly against his chest out of nervousness. His thoughts were jumbled as he feared that his words may have affected her in a negative way and he was afraid of what her speech to him might have been.
“The world is a test of faith and how well we can survive. Your inner strength is what is needed to surpass anything that comes your way. The light that sparks within you burns vibrantly. I can see that in you even when you don’t notice it. It may fade for a bit during your trials, but it never extinguishes. You must remember that good things come to good people. You have to work hard sometimes, but the reward is always great.”
Reita sighed silently, trying to let his doubts out with that motion. With the silent gesture of a nod, he let her know that he understood her words and tried to place a gentle grin across his once forlorn features. Silence hung in the air but only for a moment. A figure entered the room and immediately upon seeing the extra person in there, bowed low and apologized instantly. Reita quickly recognized the woman as the home nurse, Haruka. She was the latest addition to the home care that was devised to take care of the elderly woman. Haruka’s face was filled with guilt as she tried to find the words deep within her throat. As much as she knew how important the man was in Sakura’s life, she had to keep to her duties.
“I hate to ask you to leave but I must insist so that she can get some rest,” she mentioned regretfully. The young man nodded understandingly towards the nurse without being told twice. As he rose himself off of the chair, he placed it back to where it belonged and made a small gesture as a form of goodbye as he took his leave.
The weather-beaten apartment building didn’t stand out like most of the neighboring ones but it was something that he called home. The evening encased the surrounding area but the street lights were intense enough to see the deterioration of the place. The outside showed its age with the chipping paint and the worn down entrance door with markings of it being kicked in before. It was well known in this apartment building that the door needed fixing but the landlord pretended to listen to the complaints and did nothing. It was then that the tenants gave up and just dealt with it on their own, hence the shoe markings against the debilitated grain. Reita approached it casually and opened it up the way he normally did and entered. He passed by the familiar halls as he made his way towards the stairway; another known fact was to not use the elevator because it had a habit of breaking. Hopping up two steps at a time with his long legs, Reita made his way up the few floors that it took to get to the one he called his own. Fumbling slightly with his set of keys, he found the right one and forced it into the keyhole, turning and hearing the click as it unlocked. The obscurity that enveloped the room was broken with a rectangular pathway as the light followed him from the hallway. He reached over to the light switch nearby and turned it on, illuminating the living room area somewhat with the few lamps that were in the room and closed the door behind him. Even with the artificial light that emanated throughout the area, the colors of the room seemed to beam faintly. The mint colored walls only had a few picture frames to decorate and distract from the fact that it possessed very little furniture. He dropped the items he was hauling uncaringly towards the entrance, knowing that it was only going with him again the next morning.
Reita knew that Kai had already gone to bed since he had left a few hours before he did so he knew to keep the noise level to a minimum. Even though it hadn’t been too much longer before Kai joined the band, they seemed to mesh well together as room mates. Gradually, he made his way towards the bedroom, the silhouette of his lean body coming closer to the room. Instinctively, he placed a hand against the doorway to steady his balance as he felt that the darkness was deceiving his perception. Reita smirked softly to himself as he noticed his futon was already laid out for him with a sign of detailed care with the blanket. The drummer was too nice for his own good sometimes, he thought to himself. Seeing the tiny mass nearby snoring softly, he entered the room and slipped underneath the soft materials of his bed so that he could get whatever sleep he could muster.
「Author」: novlomien
「Chapters」: 1/?
「Fandom」: J-Rock
「Characters」: Reita, OC, the GazettE
「Genre」: Angst, General, Slight AU
「Warning」: Some language
「Rating」: R (to be safe)
「Word Count」: 3,784
「Synopsis」: The true story behind Reita’s noseband...
「Author’s Notes」: This is a story I started early last year and have yet to finish but I need to start posting it. This is a chaptered fic. This story is slightly AU so please bear with me. It’s written how it is so if you don’t like it, go read something else; I’m not changing it for anyone else just because it has big words in it or you don't like it. This story means a lot to me so I don't need your judging.
Disclaimer: Don't own the GazettE, only the original character, don't sue. This is a work of fiction and should be read as such.
►Previous Chapters:
.:.(Prologue)
Many years ago…
A few male sparrows hiding neatly beneath the lush leaves of the trees sang a beautifully crafted song deep within their tiny bodies. The trills echoed softly within the lush environment as the inviting breeze made its presence known throughout the blades of grass and foliage all around the inhabited town. The wind brought out a number of figures who had been hiding from the previous weather conditions and were taking a stroll along the sidewalks as they passed by small shops. A few couples could be seen enjoying the day as they clutched the arm of their loved one while they took their time to relish in the sunshine.
Though this was a rare day to be enjoyed, the occupants in the tiny studio hardly knew of the beauty that was waiting for them. The front doors were opened just enough to let the fresh air in as it raced down the narrow tiled hallways. Framed pictures of artists plastered on the wooden walls represented the gratification of those who had used the building’s services before. A few authority figures who were cleaned and pressed had a cup of coffee in hand as they engaged in business discussion. Even though the incessant chatter of excitement and voices of outlook seemed to overpower the men’s conversation, they continued to converse with themselves without hesitation.
The group in the studio was having a much needed break after being in the enclosed area for many hours trying to perfect their latest single and enjoying a take out meal. Most of them were already school buddies and it showed how comfortable they were with each other. It wasn’t too long ago that they had signed with Matina Records but after one single and a few videos later, they had already replaced a member and signed with a new label. The procedures of a band are not always easy. The path to strive for perfection and agreeability is always present for a great first impression and mobility; force behind the music is never enough if the proper promotion and function are not there.
Upon first glance, you could see the fair face of Aoi with his long sleek charcoal locks. He flicked his head so that the few strands that were falling towards his eyes were thrown back slightly. The youthful features on his face were striking and his contagious smile was accentuated by two bottom lip rings. Uruha was sitting next to the fellow musician, with the delicate features of a fair maiden enhanced with salient almond eyes that could stop anyone in their tracks. Being the chief member that enjoyed the pleasure of alcohol, Uruha bickered with the other guitarist as they fought over the last swig of the sweet drink. Aoi gingerly tugged on the other man’s dirty blonde tresses knowing that would stop him from prevailing. Uruha yelped mellifluously while Aoi’s outstretched hand grasped the neck of the bottle and quickly swilled the burning drink.
The always discernible Kai, with his seemingly untamable ebony hair, sat between the pouting Uruha and the group’s vocalist. His mouth formed a wide, dorky smile as he chuckled at the sight of his friends going at it over something so miniscule. The cheery drummer strived to bring the positive energy to the group now that he was recently dubbed leader after the departure of the original drummer; he had the challenge of changing his persona to a more proactive approach. The vocalist, Ruki, watched what was going on around him with a small smirk that made his delicate cheeks distend faintly. As if having toyed with the Kool-Aid, a few parts of his soft short hair were covered with an astounding ruby color weaved with his naturally raven hair. Sipping on some hot tea, he tried to keep his talking to a minimum in order to save his singing voice. Gold jewelry from his lobes sparkled gently in the artificial light that matched the trinkets around his neck and wrists.
Trying not to show a grin across his serious face, Reita was next to the vocalist as he only observed. Sporting a blonde, grown out mop-top style haircut that highlighted his honeyed ivory features, he glanced around at the lively discussions that his band members were having as he tentatively ate his food. Not entirely seeing it himself, the man’s eclipsed eyes, rotund nose, and prominent mouth enhanced the bassist’s natural exquisiteness. And like a lot of individuals, he was the reserved type who would watch from afar most of the time as his band mates joked with one another. It was not like they fooled around all the time though, when it came down to what they loved doing, it was as if it was a complete turnaround. Concentration and complete focus were initiated solely towards their craft. Though he would never admit it, this is when Reita felt the most comfortable. When he was immersed with his instrument, playing the deep tones as they hummed from his fingers throughout the rest of his body, it was a feeling of freeing and familiarity.
Seeing how quiet his fellow band member was being, Aoi took it upon himself to steal the remaining items off of Reita’s plate. Giving him a crooked smile of victory, he inserted the said pieces into his parted pierced mouth. Reita saw this immediately and turned his head up towards the guitarist with a glare. He knew he was only doing that to make him react so that he wasn’t silent for much longer. The bassist gave in and threw a look of warning to satiate the immaturity that was exhuming from the fellow member. He then pushed his plate away lightly as he rested his arms against the table while the center of the discussions rolled around to some of the tracks that they had just tried out.
“I think it sounds good the way it is,” Reita voiced his opinion briefly, his unique velvet voice matched the tones of the instrument he played. His hand gestured lightly as the few rings on his digits gleamed temporarily in the artificial lights.
“The beat doesn’t seem right, I think we should take the tempo up a bit,” Kai revealed, uncertainty laced within his voice.
“You say that about all the upbeat songs,” Ruki mentioned, stealing a bit more of food in the center of the table with his chopsticks then lightly added. “You know what those songs do to me, you’ll have me sounding like a screaming banshee at the end of every show, you know.”
“Don’t lie, you know you enjoy it,” Uruha mentioned with a wink.
“So it’s settled, faster tempo it is,” Kai stated casually with a giddy smile. Aoi turned his attention to the fellow member.
“Hey, since when did we cast the vote?” Aoi asked teasingly, raising an eyebrow at the leader.
“About a few minutes ago, you weren’t paying attention,” Ruki joked before placing another piece of food in his mouth with a grin.
“Yeah Aoi-kun, your sleepless nights are catching up to you,” Uruha joined in on the fun. “Focus!”
Aoi threw a small piece of food at his band mate while Uruha saw the action quickly and raised a defensive hand to stop the flying object. The air between the members was filled with good humor to clear the uncertainties that may have been floating previously.
Afterwards, they cleared the table and made sure that no offending items were left behind and sat down around the table once more to engage in a serious conversation. Getting comfortable in their own ways, whether by crossing their legs or leaning back in their chairs, they delved into the discussion of the recently recorded songs once more. Significant discussions took place but there was always the occasional friendly banter between the friends.
~*~
The long hours in the studio took a slight toll on the members as the evening was late. A few of them had already left, realizing that their creativity needed a deserved break. The change in the atmosphere was present as Aoi and Reita packed up, the silence between the two endured as they continued. Reita stood up from being bent over so long and felt the strain in his back. Immediately, he noticed that the fellow member had already finished gathering his belongings. The bassist’s lips pursed together when the guitarist wasn’t looking as he figured the fellow musician should just go on his way already.
“You can go ahead, I’m leaving soon after I get my stuff together,” Reita mentioned, wrapping a lengthy cord around the adaptor in his hands. He felt bad by the fact that he didn’t pack up sooner and he didn’t want his band mate to feel that he had to wait up for him; though he didn’t let that show on his face once. Aoi gazed at him as his lips formed a hesitant smirk.
“Are you sure? I don’t mind,” Aoi told him. Initially, he wasn’t bothered by the fact that he had to wait up for him. As much trouble as the tiny guitarist caused, he really had the friendliest personality, though it didn’t always show. Unfortunately, a small yawn escaped his lips to call him out on his fatigue. Reita chuckled lightly finding that to be the cue that the other man needed well deserved rest.
“You’re tired, go home and get what little sleep you can,” he mentioned. Aoi nodded and hitched up the heavy equipment towards his lean shoulder so that he could distribute the weight better. As he neared the door, Reita decided to remind him of the inevitable the next day.
“We’ve got a full day ahead of us tomorrow with that schedule our managers came up with.” A small whine came from the belly of the guitarist as he threw his head back in dramatics, definitely not something he wanted to be reminded of. He stood there briefly as if stalling would make tomorrow suddenly go away. With a short nod, Aoi made his way outside and closed the door behind him.
With a click of the lock, Reita closed the door behind him and was greeted with the cool, fresh air that the city had to offer. Darkness embodied the surrounding area as the world seemed to be at a standstill at this time of night. The shadows on the walls of the buildings seemed to dance in the streetlights, giving a sense of a creepy ambiance to the neighborhood. Reita wasn’t too afraid for he had been there many times before and followed his designated route. The streets were littered with remnants of paper trash that seemed to dance in the breeze against the dampened ground. The shuffling of his shoes echoed softly through the quiet streets as he grasped his belongings firmly within his strong fingers.
A while later, Reita made his way towards a familiar home that was near his own apartment. He realized it was late but he figured that it wouldn’t be much of a problem. As he instinctively followed the darkened pathway to the front door, he quickened his steps as he came closer to the entrance. Balancing the objects in his hands and the keys that he had pulled out of his pocket, he found the right one to use on the rusty lock. He turned the knob and gracefully entered the home. Stepping over the threshold and into the musty home, he took in the familiar scent that he was so used to greeting him. The living area was encased in a soft illumination that reflected multiple flickering candles due to the old wiring. It was an eerie feeling for people who had never been in there before because of how quiet and untouched it seemed. Placing his items beside the door, his feet made their way through the ghostly room as they bounced delicately on the plush chocolate carpet towards the destined room. He knocked lightly on the door with a single bent finger, trying to not be so surprising to the person on the other side. Without waiting for a response, he opened the door gingerly; his eyes focused on the elderly woman lying on a twin bed, propped up by a few fluffy pillows, and reading a thick book that she was halfway through. The age was present on her features, soft and delicate wrinkles were etched into her face and hands. The short silver hair she possessed was thinning but still accentuated her beauty. She turned her attention to the figure that was standing in the doorway and beamed upon recognizing who it was.
“Akira-chan.”
Nakajima Sakura was an elder friend that Reita had known for as long as he could remember. She lived a solitary life which suited her needs. It allowed her to be independent and have an outlook on life that no one else seemed to possess. She became a second mother to him as she strived to help release the potential in what he loved to do. Growing up with a strict family, Reita always had trouble trying to find himself and she helped him to blossom his talents.
It was a devastating day when he learned that she had developed cancer. As much as she went for treatment and anything else the doctor prescribed, it was still not enough for the malignant cells had progressed. Her positive outlook was the only thing keeping her going as the horrible disease continued to spread. He knew of this and tried to be at her side as much as he could. Any time there was a break, he would go to visit her not as a sense of duty, but as a sense of quiet obligation for this woman’s encouragement throughout the years. It became a natural habit simply because of her kindness and her seemingly infinite knowledge of advice and support.
No one in Reita’s circle of friends knew of her, not even the closest ones he called his band mates. There was just no room for understanding. It wasn’t so much a matter of trust; it was more towards a matter of keeping the dramatics away from the band. It was hard enough for them to even get as far as they were at that moment and he wanted to keep them on the roll with nothing to hold them back. The band didn’t need the constant worry or strain that he had to take on his shoulders already. He also saw it as being weak whenever he had troubles; he knew he couldn’t bring them up with the guys without being ridiculed for it. Having emotional ties to a mother figure would have been death to his already formed nature with them; he was the tougher one, the one with nothing that could break him down, a “bad boy” with a seemingly uncaring desire. And more than ever, he wanted to keep it that way because it was winning him respect.
Seeing her health fall a little bit each time he saw her, as much as it pained him, he tried not to let it get to him so much. He wanted her days to be as happy as they could be. It was the only thing he could do for everything she had done and continued to do for him. Her smile was genuine and always contagious. He would find himself grinning even when he felt that the whole world was against him.
“I didn’t think you’d be up this late,” Reita mentioned, letting himself in when he saw her friendly smile. The slight chill in the small room created a tinge that followed up his spine briefly knowing how the elder enjoyed the wintry ambiance.
“I slept all day since I came home from the hospital,” Sakura mentioned. Reita’s eyes winced naturally but wiped it off as quickly while he turned to her.
“I’m glad you’re home,” he relayed, bringing a rickety chair towards her bedside and taking a seat on it. When he sat down upon it, he accidentally let the wall down momentarily before he glanced upon the woman.
“How have you been Akira-chan? You look especially tired today,” she asked, concern evident in her voice as she tilted her head slightly to emphasize her growing worry. His gaze was of a slight guilt, as he wasn’t sure if he should bring up any worries with her especially when she had a hard day of recovery from the treatments they were giving her lately.
“I’m okay, just…” he trailed off a bit as he gathered his thoughts. Normally, he wasn’t one to admit that concerns gradually crossed his mind. “There have been a lot of changes to the band recently and I’m not sure how it’s going at the moment.”
“You boys have had to endure a lot of letdowns. Becoming successful in the music business is very hard indeed,” she mentioned, knowing from his previous stories that they were having a tough time even getting signed.
“Sometimes I wonder if this is really what I want,” he revealed softly, doubt laced within his voice as he admitted it aloud. Naturally, his head bowed down in a shameful way, feeling culpable for even admitting that much.
“Such doubts will weigh on your mind when you are the most vulnerable,” she related to him with a gentle smile, even though he didn’t see her expression. “I know how much music plays a part in your life. I don’t want to see you give it up without a fight.”
Delicately, she placed a shaky hand beneath his chin as she gently forced his head up to look at her. His almond eyes flickered towards hers, glistening in the dim light as his heart pounded slightly against his chest out of nervousness. His thoughts were jumbled as he feared that his words may have affected her in a negative way and he was afraid of what her speech to him might have been.
“The world is a test of faith and how well we can survive. Your inner strength is what is needed to surpass anything that comes your way. The light that sparks within you burns vibrantly. I can see that in you even when you don’t notice it. It may fade for a bit during your trials, but it never extinguishes. You must remember that good things come to good people. You have to work hard sometimes, but the reward is always great.”
Reita sighed silently, trying to let his doubts out with that motion. With the silent gesture of a nod, he let her know that he understood her words and tried to place a gentle grin across his once forlorn features. Silence hung in the air but only for a moment. A figure entered the room and immediately upon seeing the extra person in there, bowed low and apologized instantly. Reita quickly recognized the woman as the home nurse, Haruka. She was the latest addition to the home care that was devised to take care of the elderly woman. Haruka’s face was filled with guilt as she tried to find the words deep within her throat. As much as she knew how important the man was in Sakura’s life, she had to keep to her duties.
“I hate to ask you to leave but I must insist so that she can get some rest,” she mentioned regretfully. The young man nodded understandingly towards the nurse without being told twice. As he rose himself off of the chair, he placed it back to where it belonged and made a small gesture as a form of goodbye as he took his leave.
The weather-beaten apartment building didn’t stand out like most of the neighboring ones but it was something that he called home. The evening encased the surrounding area but the street lights were intense enough to see the deterioration of the place. The outside showed its age with the chipping paint and the worn down entrance door with markings of it being kicked in before. It was well known in this apartment building that the door needed fixing but the landlord pretended to listen to the complaints and did nothing. It was then that the tenants gave up and just dealt with it on their own, hence the shoe markings against the debilitated grain. Reita approached it casually and opened it up the way he normally did and entered. He passed by the familiar halls as he made his way towards the stairway; another known fact was to not use the elevator because it had a habit of breaking. Hopping up two steps at a time with his long legs, Reita made his way up the few floors that it took to get to the one he called his own. Fumbling slightly with his set of keys, he found the right one and forced it into the keyhole, turning and hearing the click as it unlocked. The obscurity that enveloped the room was broken with a rectangular pathway as the light followed him from the hallway. He reached over to the light switch nearby and turned it on, illuminating the living room area somewhat with the few lamps that were in the room and closed the door behind him. Even with the artificial light that emanated throughout the area, the colors of the room seemed to beam faintly. The mint colored walls only had a few picture frames to decorate and distract from the fact that it possessed very little furniture. He dropped the items he was hauling uncaringly towards the entrance, knowing that it was only going with him again the next morning.
Reita knew that Kai had already gone to bed since he had left a few hours before he did so he knew to keep the noise level to a minimum. Even though it hadn’t been too much longer before Kai joined the band, they seemed to mesh well together as room mates. Gradually, he made his way towards the bedroom, the silhouette of his lean body coming closer to the room. Instinctively, he placed a hand against the doorway to steady his balance as he felt that the darkness was deceiving his perception. Reita smirked softly to himself as he noticed his futon was already laid out for him with a sign of detailed care with the blanket. The drummer was too nice for his own good sometimes, he thought to himself. Seeing the tiny mass nearby snoring softly, he entered the room and slipped underneath the soft materials of his bed so that he could get whatever sleep he could muster.