feeling a bit down...
I was supposed to celebrate my 22nd birthday (the actual day is Wednesday) with my friends today. But no one was free so it was canceled late last night. (more about this later!) Instead, I spent my day at the Museum of Fine Arts with my younger sister. We went to Chinatown to have pho and strawberry shakes after that. It was pretty fun, looking at the amazing artwork by European masters. I am hoping to see more artwork by them in my art history class next semester. And I have to thank my lovely sister for spending the day with me. <3 We also watched the North and South DVD...ahhh, a good-looking British fellow can always make me feel better!
But I honestly didn't want to see any of my friends today...
My sister did ask me, when we were eating pho, whether I was sad that none of my friends were free. I had been thinking about it all last night. At first, I was a bit upset because the supposedly party planner waited until the last minute to plan and call. But then again, I cannot blame her for I told her that I was going to be busy for a while. She didn't dare ask me when I was free until early last week. So I can say that it is partly my fault that today's birthday lunch didn't happen. Truthfully, however, I am kind of sad. Turning 22 isn't a big deal, of course, but the point is that we haven't seen each other since July. We were supposed to celebrate Sue's birthday in September, but she had to go down to the Cape, and so that plan never happened...
And now, I do not feel like celebrating my birthday with my friends anymore. There's nothing to celebrate.
I think the only reason why I feel like this is because I know that we are slowly changing...
We can't be seeing other so often anymore. Our priorities are vastly different.
We're all getting older, piling on responsibilities...
And, ugh, god. Don't you hate it when "friendship" is reduced to Facebook and cell phones?
I don't know. I just don't feel like celebrating my birthday with friends anymore. I don't want them to feel obligated to make an appearance or even give me anything.
Because getting presents isn't what I want.
And what I want, I can't have.
*laughs cynically* Isn't life always like that?
I'll be okay, I promise. I just need a few days to myself. I'll have to see them in school tomorrow, but I'll manage.
I know I'll get a bit defensive once they cast those "pity" looks at me, though. Or if they say, "Sorry...." I'll just get pissed.
'Cause I really don't want to hear any of it.
I'm a bit pathetic today.
I'll go watch Hana Yori Dango Returns.
(And it's sad how HYD seems to cheer me up a whole lot better than...well, anything or anyone at the moment.)
But I honestly didn't want to see any of my friends today...
My sister did ask me, when we were eating pho, whether I was sad that none of my friends were free. I had been thinking about it all last night. At first, I was a bit upset because the supposedly party planner waited until the last minute to plan and call. But then again, I cannot blame her for I told her that I was going to be busy for a while. She didn't dare ask me when I was free until early last week. So I can say that it is partly my fault that today's birthday lunch didn't happen. Truthfully, however, I am kind of sad. Turning 22 isn't a big deal, of course, but the point is that we haven't seen each other since July. We were supposed to celebrate Sue's birthday in September, but she had to go down to the Cape, and so that plan never happened...
And now, I do not feel like celebrating my birthday with my friends anymore. There's nothing to celebrate.
I think the only reason why I feel like this is because I know that we are slowly changing...
We can't be seeing other so often anymore. Our priorities are vastly different.
We're all getting older, piling on responsibilities...
And, ugh, god. Don't you hate it when "friendship" is reduced to Facebook and cell phones?
I don't know. I just don't feel like celebrating my birthday with friends anymore. I don't want them to feel obligated to make an appearance or even give me anything.
Because getting presents isn't what I want.
And what I want, I can't have.
*laughs cynically* Isn't life always like that?
I'll be okay, I promise. I just need a few days to myself. I'll have to see them in school tomorrow, but I'll manage.
I know I'll get a bit defensive once they cast those "pity" looks at me, though. Or if they say, "Sorry...." I'll just get pissed.
'Cause I really don't want to hear any of it.
I'm a bit pathetic today.
I'll go watch Hana Yori Dango Returns.
(And it's sad how HYD seems to cheer me up a whole lot better than...well, anything or anyone at the moment.)