Boy trouble
Currently single...feels like I`m always single...but I get hit on a lot. So what`s the problem???? People actually ask that, as if there is only one reason why it doesn`t work out and I haven`t found someone datable or at least doable. In my book, sex≠love. But I still consider myself to be pretty prude/picky/cautious when it comes to even fooling around.
So what`s the problem? I get a lot of "理想が高い" (You have high expectations) or "高嶺の花（だから彼氏できない）" (People view you as out of their league (so you can`t get a boyfriend)) which are pretty much complete opposites.
I wonder about 理想が高い... The guy doesn`t need to know English or be too interested in learning English. Or at least, he doesn`t need to learn English for my sake. I prefer slightly better than average looking guys that aren`t too different in age and are good at talking. I don`t really care about wealth or the person`s schooling history, but cheery and fun to be around would be nice. Someone easy to talk with and spend time with is a must and good looking guys tend to be the better talkers. Job status (ie salary) and educational history don`t matter so much. Some people I have met with impressive educational backgrounds and jobs have been really insufferable, it`s so hard to keep up conversation with them and I feel like I have to continually entertain them or we`ll fall into awkward silence or me being interrogated. I don`t mind chilling with someone I know, but that`s when I feel comfortable with the person.
"高嶺の花（だから彼氏できない）" ...Yet sometimes the weirdest guys hit on me. That and like good looking guys 22-25, but most tend to be 22 or 23. WTF, I`m almost 29. Give me a break. I guess young good looking guys tend to be bolder and thus hit on more girls. Example: I got hit on by a super cute guy around 8pm who agreed to meet up with me after the gym. Made him wait about 3 hours and he showed up one time, as promised. He ended up being 22. Darn... He was hot and nice, so I was like "Call me!" Hah, but he probably won`t. 7 years younger is a big age gap when you`re still in your 20s.
And my guys friends are ridiculous. I mean, I`m glad to have them around so I don`t feel so lonely. Friends are important. But some of them sabotage my chances with guys, say they don`t want me to date, tell me I don`t need to date, and are actually happy when I don`t sleep with a guy or reject him entirely.
I got asked out by some dude I met like once months ago...it ended up being a guy that I decided I didn`t like at all after talking with him for 30 minutes the first time I met him and his イケメン friend. This time he was sober and still really hard to talk to. One of my guy friends (who married recently) messaged me because he was worried for my safety, but also wanted to make sure I didn`t have sex with my date. Of course I didn`t. ....Yeah, he`s not the only one like that. One guy drunk that I don`t even consider that close of a friend said that even though he`s married and has a kid and can`t be with me (because I`m not generally interested in married dudes), he doesn`t want me to be with anyone. That was supposed to be a compliment, but he was being serious and really hurt (for various reasons).
What to do? Go back to walking around and window shopping in Fukuoka I guess. The weather is getting nice, might as well. Over a year ago I stopped doing that because guys approaching me would freak me out. I was too nervous (and not good enough at Japanese) to easily talk to some random person. But now I feel I can do it. Maybe go with a lady friend, but a guy will just keep practically all of the guys away. So annoying. トライしてみないとね。
So what`s the problem? I get a lot of "理想が高い" (You have high expectations) or "高嶺の花（だから彼氏できない）" (People view you as out of their league (so you can`t get a boyfriend)) which are pretty much complete opposites.
I wonder about 理想が高い... The guy doesn`t need to know English or be too interested in learning English. Or at least, he doesn`t need to learn English for my sake. I prefer slightly better than average looking guys that aren`t too different in age and are good at talking. I don`t really care about wealth or the person`s schooling history, but cheery and fun to be around would be nice. Someone easy to talk with and spend time with is a must and good looking guys tend to be the better talkers. Job status (ie salary) and educational history don`t matter so much. Some people I have met with impressive educational backgrounds and jobs have been really insufferable, it`s so hard to keep up conversation with them and I feel like I have to continually entertain them or we`ll fall into awkward silence or me being interrogated. I don`t mind chilling with someone I know, but that`s when I feel comfortable with the person.
"高嶺の花（だから彼氏できない）" ...Yet sometimes the weirdest guys hit on me. That and like good looking guys 22-25, but most tend to be 22 or 23. WTF, I`m almost 29. Give me a break. I guess young good looking guys tend to be bolder and thus hit on more girls. Example: I got hit on by a super cute guy around 8pm who agreed to meet up with me after the gym. Made him wait about 3 hours and he showed up one time, as promised. He ended up being 22. Darn... He was hot and nice, so I was like "Call me!" Hah, but he probably won`t. 7 years younger is a big age gap when you`re still in your 20s.
And my guys friends are ridiculous. I mean, I`m glad to have them around so I don`t feel so lonely. Friends are important. But some of them sabotage my chances with guys, say they don`t want me to date, tell me I don`t need to date, and are actually happy when I don`t sleep with a guy or reject him entirely.
I got asked out by some dude I met like once months ago...it ended up being a guy that I decided I didn`t like at all after talking with him for 30 minutes the first time I met him and his イケメン friend. This time he was sober and still really hard to talk to. One of my guy friends (who married recently) messaged me because he was worried for my safety, but also wanted to make sure I didn`t have sex with my date. Of course I didn`t. ....Yeah, he`s not the only one like that. One guy drunk that I don`t even consider that close of a friend said that even though he`s married and has a kid and can`t be with me (because I`m not generally interested in married dudes), he doesn`t want me to be with anyone. That was supposed to be a compliment, but he was being serious and really hurt (for various reasons).
What to do? Go back to walking around and window shopping in Fukuoka I guess. The weather is getting nice, might as well. Over a year ago I stopped doing that because guys approaching me would freak me out. I was too nervous (and not good enough at Japanese) to easily talk to some random person. But now I feel I can do it. Maybe go with a lady friend, but a guy will just keep practically all of the guys away. So annoying. トライしてみないとね。