so confused, man
I am not feeling this. Any of this. I fucking hate how right the pyschic was... she hit it right on the head about the "don't trust anyone part" and "someone is lying to you" except it hurts worse when you think you know who it is... and you find out that it is someone totally different. Fuck you, motherfucker. I feel like I have wasted a part of my life on people who don't matter, or won't ever matter. When you think that you know something it turns out that you really know NOTHING at all. At this point I don't care what people have to say about me because none of it is real. It seems like the only one who knows what is real is Fucking Kenny. And I wish I talked to Jay the other night. He probably keeps it real too. I'd like to get to know Stacey better...maybe when we go to Oregon we will bond. 5 months seems so far away. 3 months seems just as far. hah 7 years has gone by with him and it has felt like hours... but this last stretch is killing me. you don't understand do you? Its ok. You don't have to. I've got to think about some things, "by the 21st things should clear up" well its happening sooner than we thought. That chick was good. If I ever feel stuck again i'll go to her.
It's funny how things are turning out. I really expected things to go like this. Over petty shit. "Not Real" shit. But what is real in that world? I always knew the answer to that question...why do I ask it again?
He said I should be there. I, ME, NATASHA should be THERE for, yeah. He doesn't get it! But then again I didn't even get it! that old saying "time will tell" is right there. It always tells the truth. Whether or not the truth matters is arbitrary.
Home school doesn't sound so bad... except for that whole "not graduating" part... that kinda ruins it. I kinda just feel like I need to put a penny in my ear and wake up... ha the good old days! Things were simple then. Maybe I should start from there. I should apologize to someone for being stupid. Hey, Chad, if you ever read this: I'm sorry, man. You're still a punk but... I understand why. I would be too. According to my time card I am... and to Josh. Dewey Lee. Hee. He certainly is cute. " I guess I'll se you next lifetime....we'll be butterflies" and maybe coffee and sugar, babay. Erykah told me all along, smart lady.
Oh yeah... Almost forgot! To clear up any confusion: Congrats to all the people on Captain's Table...!! You finally got what you deserved!
It's funny how things are turning out. I really expected things to go like this. Over petty shit. "Not Real" shit. But what is real in that world? I always knew the answer to that question...why do I ask it again?
He said I should be there. I, ME, NATASHA should be THERE for, yeah. He doesn't get it! But then again I didn't even get it! that old saying "time will tell" is right there. It always tells the truth. Whether or not the truth matters is arbitrary.
Home school doesn't sound so bad... except for that whole "not graduating" part... that kinda ruins it. I kinda just feel like I need to put a penny in my ear and wake up... ha the good old days! Things were simple then. Maybe I should start from there. I should apologize to someone for being stupid. Hey, Chad, if you ever read this: I'm sorry, man. You're still a punk but... I understand why. I would be too. According to my time card I am... and to Josh. Dewey Lee. Hee. He certainly is cute. " I guess I'll se you next lifetime....we'll be butterflies" and maybe coffee and sugar, babay. Erykah told me all along, smart lady.
Oh yeah... Almost forgot! To clear up any confusion: Congrats to all the people on Captain's Table...!! You finally got what you deserved!