the path to the PhD
So much to do that suddenly seems inconsequential, though I am sure I'm wrong on this point. Suddenly the creativity seems less important than continued study and the broadening of my knowledge base. So much to know, of which I am genuinely interested. Began reading, for fun, Saïd's book on cultural imperialism, soooo eye opening, when you think that these concepts are still largely at play and are interwoven so deeply into the fabirc not only of the countries now existing in the post colonial age but of their colonisers, those metropoli of power who have been equally influenced by their conquests abroad.
I think these studies, those which try their best to link together what is happening around the globe, to understand that the present informs on the past, that the present in fact creates the past, and that the consequence of different interpretations of the past is often war, an understanding of this is key to a peaceful NOW.
Wouldn't it be great to be as smart and as amazing and as talented and as respected as Toni Morrison? That would be a bad goal. I will just plug onward.
I must not let go of the creativity by imagining this to be less valid or to be secondary. I think the only reason it is paling is because it is not new, and the idea of study is new. Why is that I and many other people have such an obsession with new-ness? This is short sighted and uninformed and immature not to be able to rise above. What I have to say now may be important to no one but me in this instance, but it is laying the ground work for the later more mature work. I really think I need to delve into another artistic area just as a kind of mental lubricant. Either dance or painting, or why the hell not both? Oh yeah, because there is this little thing called time, what an unfortunate thing...but useful to daily life nontheless.
Made contact with someone from my family's past, being ignored and scorned in their present, for good reason. There does not seem to be much forgiveness that resides in families, because other members have the capability and the ability to push you so far away. But I did make contact with her, the scary west coast TM meditating yogic flying aunt. I just wanted/needed to tell her about my new experiences and she sent me back the world's longest email about how she was so happy I had shared this news with her. It's really nice to find someone you are related to to support the things that your close family is not (and not to their discreted, people all have their own boats to float after all) able to do.
I feel like this path is a little bit more secret, needs to remain a little bit more obscured than say my professional and less esoteric pursuits. Those concrete things my close family can relate to, but anything to do with meditation I understand they find foreign, a little bit spooky and hard to understand. It's ok, it's not as though I need to prosthletize, it's not as though I am about to shove these new found techniques down their throats, I think they just fear I am on my way to creeps-ville if I talk about it too much. And I've seen and heard the interactions that new meditators have with people who are not into the same things and they can get carried away and their egos can become so inflated. It's too bad.
Ahhhh well.
That is that
I think these studies, those which try their best to link together what is happening around the globe, to understand that the present informs on the past, that the present in fact creates the past, and that the consequence of different interpretations of the past is often war, an understanding of this is key to a peaceful NOW.
Wouldn't it be great to be as smart and as amazing and as talented and as respected as Toni Morrison? That would be a bad goal. I will just plug onward.
I must not let go of the creativity by imagining this to be less valid or to be secondary. I think the only reason it is paling is because it is not new, and the idea of study is new. Why is that I and many other people have such an obsession with new-ness? This is short sighted and uninformed and immature not to be able to rise above. What I have to say now may be important to no one but me in this instance, but it is laying the ground work for the later more mature work. I really think I need to delve into another artistic area just as a kind of mental lubricant. Either dance or painting, or why the hell not both? Oh yeah, because there is this little thing called time, what an unfortunate thing...but useful to daily life nontheless.
Made contact with someone from my family's past, being ignored and scorned in their present, for good reason. There does not seem to be much forgiveness that resides in families, because other members have the capability and the ability to push you so far away. But I did make contact with her, the scary west coast TM meditating yogic flying aunt. I just wanted/needed to tell her about my new experiences and she sent me back the world's longest email about how she was so happy I had shared this news with her. It's really nice to find someone you are related to to support the things that your close family is not (and not to their discreted, people all have their own boats to float after all) able to do.
I feel like this path is a little bit more secret, needs to remain a little bit more obscured than say my professional and less esoteric pursuits. Those concrete things my close family can relate to, but anything to do with meditation I understand they find foreign, a little bit spooky and hard to understand. It's ok, it's not as though I need to prosthletize, it's not as though I am about to shove these new found techniques down their throats, I think they just fear I am on my way to creeps-ville if I talk about it too much. And I've seen and heard the interactions that new meditators have with people who are not into the same things and they can get carried away and their egos can become so inflated. It's too bad.
Ahhhh well.
That is that