ready for a change. [ASAP]
So it's definatley been like forever and a day since i wrote in here. But i really have the urge to write, so here i go...
I'm getting bored with my life. And i'm not really doing anything about it. Which pisses me off. I work way too much for the little money that i still have after my monthly bills. I'm finally feeling like my mother. And i don't want to. I start school in two weeks and i don't want to go. But until i get my RE license i have to keep going to school. But in order to get my license i have to study. I don't want to study. I just figured out that i work 2 jobs almost 40 hours a week. I love both my jobs don't get me wrong. But who would have know ME of all people to hold two jobs down? I'm bored. I hate the same thing every day in and day out. But i'm also scared of failure. I'm afraid if i stray from what i know and what i love, I'll get lost. I won't know what to do. And i will fail. That's my biggest fear. But i do believe It's time for a change. I just don't know what.
My love life sucks. As usual. But then again I really don't think i would have time for a guy in my life right now. Even if there were some prospects. I decided at the river this weekend. That i'm going to find some good looking rich guy in his late twenties to take care of me. How awesome would that be? Freakin amazing. I'm kinda pissed at myself though. This guy pulled up to the dock. by himself. TOTALLY MY TYPE. tall. dark. not too in shape, but just enough. kinda like me. AND I DIDN'T GO TALK TO HIM. i'm such a pussy. we were making eyes, but that's about it. That's exactly what i need though. He's out there somewhere. And i'll find him. maybe...
I also decided that i can't stand some of the people i hang out with. There's only a handful of them that i like. The rest of them are so fuckin fake it's unbelieveable. I can't stand their drama, their fakeness, their longing to fit in so they have to try so hard. There are a few girls that need to keep their mouth shut before i shut it for them. I won't say names, but i'm sure they know who they are. I'm done with stupid people. it's not flattering. and deff after this weekend. they need to say away from me because i really don't have the tolerance to put up with them. just a word to the wise.
For the most part i love my life. ha. i know kinda second guessing myself. but i do. If it weren't for a boring job, stupid people, and the lack of a guy in my life, my days would go a lot smoother.
I'm getting bored with my life. And i'm not really doing anything about it. Which pisses me off. I work way too much for the little money that i still have after my monthly bills. I'm finally feeling like my mother. And i don't want to. I start school in two weeks and i don't want to go. But until i get my RE license i have to keep going to school. But in order to get my license i have to study. I don't want to study. I just figured out that i work 2 jobs almost 40 hours a week. I love both my jobs don't get me wrong. But who would have know ME of all people to hold two jobs down? I'm bored. I hate the same thing every day in and day out. But i'm also scared of failure. I'm afraid if i stray from what i know and what i love, I'll get lost. I won't know what to do. And i will fail. That's my biggest fear. But i do believe It's time for a change. I just don't know what.
My love life sucks. As usual. But then again I really don't think i would have time for a guy in my life right now. Even if there were some prospects. I decided at the river this weekend. That i'm going to find some good looking rich guy in his late twenties to take care of me. How awesome would that be? Freakin amazing. I'm kinda pissed at myself though. This guy pulled up to the dock. by himself. TOTALLY MY TYPE. tall. dark. not too in shape, but just enough. kinda like me. AND I DIDN'T GO TALK TO HIM. i'm such a pussy. we were making eyes, but that's about it. That's exactly what i need though. He's out there somewhere. And i'll find him. maybe...
I also decided that i can't stand some of the people i hang out with. There's only a handful of them that i like. The rest of them are so fuckin fake it's unbelieveable. I can't stand their drama, their fakeness, their longing to fit in so they have to try so hard. There are a few girls that need to keep their mouth shut before i shut it for them. I won't say names, but i'm sure they know who they are. I'm done with stupid people. it's not flattering. and deff after this weekend. they need to say away from me because i really don't have the tolerance to put up with them. just a word to the wise.
For the most part i love my life. ha. i know kinda second guessing myself. but i do. If it weren't for a boring job, stupid people, and the lack of a guy in my life, my days would go a lot smoother.