This is kind of an important post. I have some things that I need to say, and people here that I hope read and understand. I'm hoping it will be cathartic for me
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Hmm. As for help, I mean - I'm coming out of a long long time of repressing a lot of hurt and anxiety and not really confiding in anyone, so this is kind of a first step. I'm still going through the discovery / self-pity phase and thus I think if someone tried to tell me some hard truths, unless it was someone that I was totally sure loved me as a person, it would just make me upset for right now. Later on, though, I think I will be ready for that sort of thing.
It's not that I haven't wanted help, it's more that I didn't know what I needed help WITH, and it hasn't just been you. There is a reason I don't have any close friends in my life.
I'm sorry that I made you feel like that, and I want you to know it was never like that in my head. I don't consider myself superior to you. You have things that you excel at, I have things that I excel at, it's not a competition. I'm not sure how else to explain.
It's kind of strange to me, with you. When we're alone together, I find that generally we have a good time and get along fine, but when others are around (usually Sam, now that I think about it), you seem to be kind of grouchy and irritable and I'm not sure if it's directed at me, or what. So I don't know what to do with that. :/
I do really like you though, I think you're a cool person and I pretty consistently have fun hanging out with you when it's just you and me. (Like in the car on the way to food a couple weekends ago? That was quality Lauren time. ^_^)
It's not that I haven't wanted help, it's more that I didn't know what I needed help WITH, and it hasn't just been you. There is a reason I don't have any close friends in my life.
I'm sorry that I made you feel like that, and I want you to know it was never like that in my head. I don't consider myself superior to you. You have things that you excel at, I have things that I excel at, it's not a competition. I'm not sure how else to explain.
It's kind of strange to me, with you. When we're alone together, I find that generally we have a good time and get along fine, but when others are around (usually Sam, now that I think about it), you seem to be kind of grouchy and irritable and I'm not sure if it's directed at me, or what. So I don't know what to do with that. :/
I do really like you though, I think you're a cool person and I pretty consistently have fun hanging out with you when it's just you and me. (Like in the car on the way to food a couple weekends ago? That was quality Lauren time. ^_^)
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