(no subject)
last night i had a dream that i tried to kill a little girl by feeding her a teaspoon of liquid mercury and telling her it was cough syrup. i remember wanting to kill her but i dont remember why i wanted her dead. i didnt know her or her family or even what house we were in. i spilled some of the mercury onto my hands and instead of it rolling around in my palm it stuck there like cement and wouldnt come off. i fed her the mercury even though i would surely be caught.i wish i could dream like that every night. i have the best dreams when i fall asleep high.
i wonder if a napkin would absorb liquid mercury. the weight of it and the way it rolls around makes me think that it couldnt be absorbed.
i definitely had some sort of nervous breakdown yesterday. im still not feeling right, but it definitely takes a few days to recover from something like that.
mallory has to take 150mg of ceraquil just to be able to sleep. im pretty sure the normal dosage is about 25mg if youre taking it to help you sleep like she is. shes been out of her meds for 4 days now and she hasnt slept since.
i gave her a tonnnn of OTC stuff that i thought might help but none of them did. then we smoked a lot of pot. she only slept for 20 minutes after that. she woke up and was like "damn that felt good. how long was i asleep?" and i said "just twenty minutes, babe".
today i had my first exam in history. i am certainly not in a good state of mind to be taking any exams. i honestly cant remember anything thats happened in the past two weeks. i cant focus on anything. i sat down in my moms office to study for the test but instead i just stared at the electrical outlet for four hours wanting to electricute myself. i sat down at the deak for FOUR HOURS and i only got to the SECOND question on the study guide. i cant focus on anything.
my back pain is getting much worse too. its been just lower normal back pains for a while but now it feels sort of like spasms going down the muscles on either side of my spinal cord. the pain is absolutely unreal. my aunt cindi had to have some kind of back reconstructive surgery when she was only 27. my dad when he was 43. i think im going to go for about 20.
i wonder if a napkin would absorb liquid mercury. the weight of it and the way it rolls around makes me think that it couldnt be absorbed.
i definitely had some sort of nervous breakdown yesterday. im still not feeling right, but it definitely takes a few days to recover from something like that.
mallory has to take 150mg of ceraquil just to be able to sleep. im pretty sure the normal dosage is about 25mg if youre taking it to help you sleep like she is. shes been out of her meds for 4 days now and she hasnt slept since.
i gave her a tonnnn of OTC stuff that i thought might help but none of them did. then we smoked a lot of pot. she only slept for 20 minutes after that. she woke up and was like "damn that felt good. how long was i asleep?" and i said "just twenty minutes, babe".
today i had my first exam in history. i am certainly not in a good state of mind to be taking any exams. i honestly cant remember anything thats happened in the past two weeks. i cant focus on anything. i sat down in my moms office to study for the test but instead i just stared at the electrical outlet for four hours wanting to electricute myself. i sat down at the deak for FOUR HOURS and i only got to the SECOND question on the study guide. i cant focus on anything.
my back pain is getting much worse too. its been just lower normal back pains for a while but now it feels sort of like spasms going down the muscles on either side of my spinal cord. the pain is absolutely unreal. my aunt cindi had to have some kind of back reconstructive surgery when she was only 27. my dad when he was 43. i think im going to go for about 20.