rambling on about relationships.
Later that day I got to thinking about relationships. There are those that open you up to something new and exotic, those that are old and familiar, those that bring up lots of questions, those that bring you somewhere unexpected, those that bring you far from where you started, and those that bring you back. But the most exciting, challenging and significant relationship of all is the one you have with yourself. And if you can find someone to love the you you love, well, that's just fabulous.
-Carrie Bradshaw (Sex and the City)
i think that quote is almost eye opening. it's so true. each person that has come into your life romantically has had something different to teach you about yourself. each one of my ex-boyfriends has taught me something different about myself. perhaps matt was the one to really show me that i had the ability to love and to completely open myself up to someone, but ultimately he was not the one for me. michael brought me far from where i started. i found myself attracted to his personality more than his physique and in the end that was the downfall for our relationship. both of these guys had a profound effect on my dating style. it has been with them that i discovered that i was selfish. i think we all can be a bit selfish at times and i just took it to extremes with them. i learned through them that i can be part of a relationship and give as much (or more) than i get.
therefore, i think things with craig are starting on the right foot. since he lives in daytona, we don't see eachother each day. it can be something like twice a week, and sometimes not even that! but i think this makes us want to see eachother more. see with matt, we saw eachother all the time. He was living at my college apartment mostly, and then we moved in with eachother. we took advantage of the fact that we saw eachother all the time. it cheapened the love that we thought we shared. now he's with another girl, and that's fine with me. we just weren't for eachother. i spent almost two years of my life thinking that he'd come back to me. i know that is part of the healing process, but it felt as if i had it in excess. it certainly hindered my ability to be with michael.
what i have with craig just feels right. he balances me out right. he's the more logical and practical one while i am the more creative and whimisical one. now, i know this is not a fairytale, it's real life, but the first couple weeks/months of any relationship is that fairytale period. we make sense. the things that always is in the back of mind is what other people say, like that we are moving too fast. ok, i've always falled quickly for guys. i told matt i loved him in the shower two weeks after we met. perhaps that was too fast. i felt it though. craig always tells me never to deny your feelings. i'd like to adhere to that advice. i hate wen people tell you that you are going too fast in your relationships. i mean how do they know, are they with you when you are talking to this person for three hours on the phone and when you jut lay in your bed for almost an entire day. those times are highly cherished by me. i think you can learn a lot about a person when you are merely layig near them or talking to them on the phone. so what is the right speed? i really don't think anyone knows.
i met this older gentlemen while working an event at Universal. he told me about when he met his wife 50 years earlier. he told me that he knew right away that she was the one for him. why are old and classic love stories so much more romantic? why can't society today embrace them? he told me that one day i will meet someone and know that they are the right person for me. i mean that's romantic.
matt has finally passed as someone that i need in my back pocket. he's moved on fully and me well, i am just starting something that has the potential to be amazing with craig.
-Carrie Bradshaw (Sex and the City)
i think that quote is almost eye opening. it's so true. each person that has come into your life romantically has had something different to teach you about yourself. each one of my ex-boyfriends has taught me something different about myself. perhaps matt was the one to really show me that i had the ability to love and to completely open myself up to someone, but ultimately he was not the one for me. michael brought me far from where i started. i found myself attracted to his personality more than his physique and in the end that was the downfall for our relationship. both of these guys had a profound effect on my dating style. it has been with them that i discovered that i was selfish. i think we all can be a bit selfish at times and i just took it to extremes with them. i learned through them that i can be part of a relationship and give as much (or more) than i get.
therefore, i think things with craig are starting on the right foot. since he lives in daytona, we don't see eachother each day. it can be something like twice a week, and sometimes not even that! but i think this makes us want to see eachother more. see with matt, we saw eachother all the time. He was living at my college apartment mostly, and then we moved in with eachother. we took advantage of the fact that we saw eachother all the time. it cheapened the love that we thought we shared. now he's with another girl, and that's fine with me. we just weren't for eachother. i spent almost two years of my life thinking that he'd come back to me. i know that is part of the healing process, but it felt as if i had it in excess. it certainly hindered my ability to be with michael.
what i have with craig just feels right. he balances me out right. he's the more logical and practical one while i am the more creative and whimisical one. now, i know this is not a fairytale, it's real life, but the first couple weeks/months of any relationship is that fairytale period. we make sense. the things that always is in the back of mind is what other people say, like that we are moving too fast. ok, i've always falled quickly for guys. i told matt i loved him in the shower two weeks after we met. perhaps that was too fast. i felt it though. craig always tells me never to deny your feelings. i'd like to adhere to that advice. i hate wen people tell you that you are going too fast in your relationships. i mean how do they know, are they with you when you are talking to this person for three hours on the phone and when you jut lay in your bed for almost an entire day. those times are highly cherished by me. i think you can learn a lot about a person when you are merely layig near them or talking to them on the phone. so what is the right speed? i really don't think anyone knows.
i met this older gentlemen while working an event at Universal. he told me about when he met his wife 50 years earlier. he told me that he knew right away that she was the one for him. why are old and classic love stories so much more romantic? why can't society today embrace them? he told me that one day i will meet someone and know that they are the right person for me. i mean that's romantic.
matt has finally passed as someone that i need in my back pocket. he's moved on fully and me well, i am just starting something that has the potential to be amazing with craig.