hey

Sep 04, 2005 09:53

just saw 'red eye.' here are some tips for when you're in those annoying situations when someone is trying to kill a politician and your father...

1.say 'hey' a lot, it makes 'em think twice
2.keep an eye out for useful items, such as a pen with an alien on it
3.be mysterious about a scar on your breast until the oddest possible moment to explain it
4.take a shit during an intense chase scene-throws 'em off every time!
5.read dr. phil books
6.use a slightly less clumpy soap for writing messages on plane-batroom-mirrors-you don't want to write "bomb" and have people see "fish taco"
7.deny being the manager of an elite miami hotel, even if they check id-they can't prove it!
8.alway, always, ALWAYS take the time to stop, breathe heavily, and make sure the psychopath your running from is still chasing you, because they sometimes just give up
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