013 ⚸

[notsaul]

[phone]

So.

I think we all learned some pretty important fucking lessons here.

One: Don't trust anything you hear from stuttering little bitches, because if they'll lie to one person about what their fucking intentions are, they'll definitely have no problem lying to a whole bunch of evil fucks over the phone.

Two: The only thing worse than a fat Nazi

Comments

[Phone]

[tapshoetomove]

Oh, you were from the park! Are your injuries all healed now?

[notsaul]

Yeah, I heal pretty quick! You're the loser teacher's fake kid, right? [he's seen her tits that means they're friends now]

[tapshoetomove]

[They can be friends just let's not bring up the boob incident for a while.]

I'm glad! And uh, you mean Mr. Nigma? I live in his house with miss Susan and Slugger, who's my fake brother.

[He's had a...mild taste of what the Nigma/Death clan is like. It's kind of special let's put it that way.]

[notsaul]

... Dude. He's married to the hot teacher?

Why do good things happen to dumbasses...

[tapshoetomove]

Uh...well if it's any consolation, it's all fake anyway?

[What is this conversation.]

So I take it you know miss Susan as well?

[notsaul]

Uh, sorta.

She's one of my teachers.

And also she's really fucking hot.

[tapshoetomove]

...Honestly, I haven't met anyone like her before. She's kind of hard to figure out.

[notsaul]

I don't really care about figuring people out or any of that shit.

I just care if they're hot. [/SHALLOW]

[tapshoetomove]

But surely it's important to know! I mean, what if you got to know them and they turned out to not be a very nice person?

[notsaul]

Um, I'm kinda into that.

Bitches are sexy.

[tapshoetomove]

I guess I don't see the appeal in someone who's mean to others on purpose.

[notsaul]

You're young, kiddo. You'll find out in a couple of years.

[tapshoetomove]

I guess so. I have to say it's all pretty confusing.

[notsaul]

Love is the most confusing shit in the world.

But sex is easy.

Stick to that. [SAGE ADVICE FROM MYSTIC ANNIE]

[tapshoetomove]

Uhm.

Sure...I will keep that in mind.

/threadjacks

[puzzlerprince]

Now hang on just a moment.

[Hey son guess who's been eavesdropping on this call with Annie from the other phone in his study.]

I am not a dumbass. And I'm certainly not a loser. [You can practically hear the indignation in his tone, wondering why the hell Susan gets all the praise and idol status?]