You must walk down seven roads to be called a man.
The latest rave is reminiscing about one’s love for professional wrestling, so I thought I’d do the same. I can’t claim to be a wrestling fan anymore, because I felt it eventually got over-rated, too unbelievable, and uninteresting. The storylines in wrestling grew increasingly predictable and thin, culminating in repeated main events, awarding of titles, pushes, and victories to undeserving talents, and an emphasis on marketing and entertainment over actual wrestling talent. Wrestlers were at the mercy of McMahon, and I’m sure that no wrestler ever really had any control or say in how they were to be portrayed. I’m pretty sure Steve Blackman never wanted to be a member of Head Cheese, and I’m pretty sure Dennis Knight never wanted to parade around in a thong or Shawn Stasiak in pink underwear with PMS. There was always an unbelievable sense of realism when watching wrestling; it was always a fresh sigh of relief to see legitimate talents such as Shamrock, Angle, Malenko, Beniot, the Hart’s, the Guerrero’s, or even Blackman, to which I was a rare fan. These legitimate talents’ fate would be concealed in one of two ways. They would remain uncharismatic jobbers in the lower ranks because of the overemphasis on entertainment and not skill, or they would be pushed to main even status where their skills would merely compliment an array of quirky storylines and booked losses. I was tired of seeing somewhat undeserving wrestlers pushed to main event status, while other more potential wrestlers would be suppressed or forced out of the business for controversial reasons. By the way, why is Hornswaggle even in the WWE? He is the epitome of bizarre and outlandish storylines, and he’s only in the league for comedic purposes. I always enjoyed seeing a truly talented and deserving wrestler given main event status, such as Michaels, the Rock, Undertaker, Kane, Austin, and Foley- even though Foley was sometimes kept down and involved in controversial angles. I liked Triple H, but I was always upset how DX ended into his alliance with the McMahon’s. He was catapulted to main even status merely because of his association with them, even though he was most likely capable on his own. Wrestlers and journalists alike chastise Paul Levesque for his alleged “backroom” negotiations with the McMahon’s that keeps him number one in the business. My hatred for Triple H began around late 1999 when he became involved with Stephanie. I legitimately believed that Andrew “Test” Martin and Stephanie were going to get married. It was a slap in the face when we were told otherwise. I thought it would be legitimate, just as Randy Savage and Miss Elizabeth were wed at Summerslam 1991. This was in a time when the internet was nonexistent and background knowledge of wrestlers was extremely limited. I once prided myself by knowing many wrestlers’ real names, as if it were inside information.
Most of my knowledge about professional wrestling takes place in the 90s, but I still somewhat keep up on wrestling, mainly just to see how my favorites from that decade are still doing, as any wrestling fan from the 70s would keep up on Ric Flair. Some of my longtime favorites have moved on, such as Mick Foley, who was the epitome of the average man, underappreciated wrestler. He was always subjected to bizarre angles and gimmicks, and his emphasis on hardcore wrestling left him out of many prominent main event situations while he was involved with lackluster storylines such as the unexciting Hardcore Championship, boring feuds with Al Snow and the late Bossman, and an overdrawn feud with McMahon, which resulted in Foley seemingly being “fired” every other week. Steve Austin, who I never particularly liked, was a very exciting antihero who did more for McMahon’s business than any other wrestler. “Austin 3:16” became a cultural icon in the late-90s. He relied on no gimmicks, and his bad ass persona was so believable and realistic. Everyone hated their boss, and Austin taught a generation of youth to rebel against authority and don’t trust anyone. Unfortunately, even Austin’s feud with McMahon got old after awhile, but no main event was ever complete without Steve Austin. I didn’t particularly like Austin though, probably because I didn’t want to ride the enormous bandwagon of popularity surrounding Austin. Sometimes there were insane storylines that were too unrealistic and failed miserably. For example, from 1997-2000, we were constantly alerted to the supposed brotherhood of Kane and the Undertaker with Paul Bearer as a shared father. We all should recall the infamous live interview Lawler had with Bearer where he described intercourse with Kane’s mother. The storyline had so many elements and potential. It was even expanded into a fictional biography in 2005. The story was that exciting and almost believable. Their feud was highlighted by many spectacular matches, including Wrestlemania XIV, and all of their matches were rare enough to be anticipated and highly favored. Everyone was deeply curious to learn more about this mysterious Kane at a time when internet research into such a character was nonexistent. Now, Kane is a completely different goon-ish character, and it compromises the integrity and greatness of his early storyline. It not something that can easily be erased from the memories of earlier wrestling fans. You can’t let fans build up years of faith and liking toward a particular character and then suddenly and unexplainably change their image for the benefit of one-time storylines and tacky gimmicks.
When reminiscing, it seems like Owen Hart comes up a lot. He was the ultimate victim of the professional wrestling industry and their [WCW and WWF] plight to outdo each other. I’m not the kind of person to join the bandwagon of fandom once someone dies (such as those supporting their home team only after they are successful), because I can legitimately say I was a fan of Owen Hart before he died. He was a true talent that never really got that push toward main event status, yet he was memorable for competing against many soon-to-be main event wrestlers, such as Triple H, Michaels, and Austin. His match against Bret Hart at Wrestlemania X was a classic, and Owen’s “little brother” storyline was legitimate. It was only when Owen Hart was forced into controversial gimmicks did he question his career. He contemplated joining WCW and probably would have if they paid him enough. He wanted to save every penny he had for his family and their new home, and he wanted to retire early but seemed trapped in wrestling. In an interview, later shown on an impartial A&E Biography after his death (to which I still have recorded), Owen Hart expressed, just weeks before he died, that he was in the business for his family. He loved his family and wanted what was best for them, and therefore, he wrestled to make a substantial living. His alliance with Jarrett and Debra was also controversial, as Owen constantly objected to the potential angle of having relations with Debra. This forced him back to the pathetic Blue Blazer gimmick, which ultimately lead to his death on May 23, 1999. After his accident, I believed the next day that Hart probably suffered career-ending injuries but surely must still be alive since I only heard of the accident and didn’t watch the pay-per-view itself. Everyone was talking about it the next day at school. Only when I watched Raw that night did I immediately learn the truth. I have no shame in saying that I was devastated and that I cried for hours. I loved Owen Hart. He was a truly genuine wrestler and person. The WWF never spoke of the incident afterward, and it would probably be extremely taboo for them to market the incident by releasing an official biography or anything related to Owen Hart- regardless of where the profits would go. His death shattered and nearly brought down the industry. I certainly lost most of my faith in the industry. I kept asking myself, “Why did it have to happen to him?” Now, it seems like an eternity ago, and many other memorable characters have passed on since then. It was so long ago, but I remember his death like it was yesterday. I still get choked up and shed tears when I dare pop in the video from “Raw is Owen” or watch tidbits of it on YouTube. The mere mentioning of his name causes me to slip into sadness to this day. I am sad right now thinking about it.
I have countless hours of old WWF video footage from the late-90s. I enjoyed and enwrapped myself in wrestling so much that I don’t even need to watch the tapes anymore, because I still remember it all. I can still tell you that Big Boss Man was involved in some of the shittiest storyline’s in wrestling history: involved in the Corporation, dragging Big Show’s father’s casket with a car, and feeding Al Snow his own dog. But hey, that’s not any worse that Mark Henry’s “Sexual Chocolate” angle with Mae Young’s birthing of a hand or seeing Howard Finkel stripped to his underwear in a match against Lillian Garcia. There’s just not enough room in WrestleCrap for all of the crap we had to witness, but there sure were good times.