I've been changed for the better
I have just had two of the most memorable days of my life.
Let me start at the very beginning, a very good place to start. Yesterday was Liz’s 18th birthday. Sarah, Catherine and I did everything we could think of to add to the celebratory festivities. Sarah and I attacked Liz’s bed with a bunch of signs that were all to the birthday effect. I left Liz around 4 voicemails of varying genres, but all with one specific theme. I’ll let you take a guess at that. Liz celebrated with her parents and a dunkachino, and also with 41 facebook messages. I truly hope she had a wonderful day. She is such a great person and deserves only the best.
Will, Drew and I went to South Shore Plaza (mall) to finish up our holiday shopping. Will was very impressed that he finished in exactly one hour. After returning to Stonehill, the New Orleans boys (as I am sure I will call them for the rest of my life) exchanged gifts. I am so happy I was there to see the exchange, it was one of the most touching scenes I have ever been witness to. Drew gave them all shot glasses and Will gave them all beer glasses (very appropriate gifts for the boys). Of course, Tyler decided that they needed to inaugurate the glasses and so they did, and with it gave simple toasts that spoke from the heart. Although they probably will never admit it to each other, they are each a part of each other’s lives’ now. I mean, who would have thought that four boys from New Orleans, who probably would never have said one word to each other though their respective schools are literally right next door to each other would meet hundreds of miles away and create friendships that will last a lifetime. Will’s quote describes their unique personalities the best “the jock, the nerd, the pothead and the alcoholic” - and I love them all so much. I believe the toast was something to the effect of “here’s to friendship born from hardship”, in much more boyish terms of course. It was a lovely scene and I will miss them all so, so much.
Following that encounter, Will went to search for his missing bag and Drew went to wrap presents. Catherine, Sarah, Liz, Drew, Will and I all had a mini holiday/birthday party in our beloved Corr 251. It was very sweet; we all exchanged presents and told stories: an emotional and happy end to such a memorable semester.
I am so grateful for the generous gifts I received. Since I have been forbidden to send out thank you notes, I will just have to do my written thanks here. Liz: Thank you so much for the hat, scarf and glove set, I will surely look much more fashionable for my New England winter during the Spring semester than I did this one. I appreciate it so much; they’re beautiful. Catherine; I absolutely love the Mickey Mouse shirt and Nerds! I’ll keep an eye out for Minnie over the break. Sarah: I love the hat! It’s so funny and totally me. The stocking is perfect as well. Drew: Perfect! The second and third, of all movies to get! Will: The necklace is beautiful and means so much for me. I’m afraid I’m not able to give you a definite date on when I will ever take it off and I will always, always think of you when I wear it.
Liz and I exchanged a little heart-to-heart after the boys left yesterday. I don’t know what I’m going to do without them.
This morning, after waking up entirely too early, I was all packed and ready to go at 10am. So, I just hung around with Catherine and Sarah and ate random things in our fridge for breakfast. It’s pretty icky out and so I was hesitant to venture forth to scrounge for food. My throat has been a little weird for the past couple of days, I sincerely hope I’m not getting sick.
I said my goodbyes to my favorite roommates and Liz and I proceeded to Boland around 1pm so that I could take the shuttle to the T. Will and Drew met us there. It was so nice of Will to get up to say goodbye to me, I know how terribly tired he was. Drew was headed to the mall for the 3rd day in a row; how many guys can say that?
Liz and I were just standing there before the boys arrived and a random tiny car decorated in extreme amounts of Red Bull paraphernalia drove by and asked us if we wanted some Red Bull. So, Liz and I toasted about a million things on this earth and basically took shots of Red Bull waiting for the boys. Among the things we toasted were: Philosophy, the boys, Red Bull, the exams, the holidays, us, Capo, presents, next semester, Capo again, airports, gym and Capo. I can’t believe we drank so much Red Bull, I have never had a full can in my life.
The shuttle finally arrived and Liz, Drew and Will helped to get my numerous bags onto the bus. Drew climbed on and Liz watched while Will and I said our goodbye. I will never ever forget the things he said and just thinking of being in his arms brings tears to my eyes again. The screen is getting all blurry and people are beginning to stare, again. So I got on the shuttle and sat next to Drew. He asked me if I was alright and I said yes, looked at him, and burst into tears. So he hopefully asked if I wanted to wave. So I held off on the tears long enough to wave at Liz, but then the bus started moving and I saw Will, and I couldn’t take it anymore. That was the worst goodbye I have ever had in my life. Seriously. I turned to Drew and just sobbed, probably ruining his poor jacket, all the way to the Westgate mall. Every time I thought I was going to stop, I thought of another reason why I should be sad. I am so happy Drew took the shuttle with me and grateful of his attempts to comfort me. I told Drew how I seem to have allotted time to be near my friends in life; for Tulane it was a couple of days and a summer of online conversations, for the boys it was a semester, for my Stonehill friends the time is sure to be cut short as well. But Drew, you are very right, I have made friendships that will last a lifetime and everyone really is only a phone call away. I am going to miss you all so much though. I never, ever would have been able to get through all of this without you boys. Next semester will be so different without you; without my daily trips to O’hara 040b. We had so much in common, us “hurricane kids”. It is like an entire support system is gone out of my life without you there. Without you to joke about scuba diving at our real schools, how we don’t really go to Stonehill, how Will is a boy-hero and how Drew slept in a gym in Mississippi. I never expected this. When I met all of you, I thought I was making friends who would continue to be near me for the next four years of my life, even though we would all have to travel across the country to accomplish this seemingly easy goal. I know this is entirely my fault, if I had just had the courage and the strength to stand up for myself, I would never have had to be saying goodbye to all of you today. For that I am sorry, I am so sorry. I will miss you incredibly.
In the style of Liz, I have decided to list some of the memories of the boys that I have been thinking of for the past few hours. They brought me so much joy at the time, and now are bringing fond and sorrowful tears. I hope you will appreciate this trip down memory lane as much as I do.
Meeting Will on the first night I slept at Stonehill with Naomi, Catherine, Liz and Sarah.
Seeing the boys for the first time at Dean Grant’s mini Orientation party for us.
Will attempting to teach me to play basketball one night.
Will and I swing dancing in his room.
The time Tyler fell down the stairs.
The boys introducing me to Ray. The first thing I remember him telling me is that he is blunt.
Will's idea to build a boat; good one, Noah.
Being introduced to “Asian”.
The night we all got soaked and Will encouraged me to try something new.
Drew and I playing tennis in extreme temperatures, making cars run after balls and our attempts at prohibiting each other from ever having children.
The way Will’s cologne smells.
Introducing Drew to Liz.
Will taking me to Boston.
Naps.
The smiles and laughter induced by the first few weeks after Will found out I am a little ticklish.
Talking, just talking to the boys about New Orleans. And having them really understand what I was talking about.
Walking to Subway in the rain.
Permanent marker fights.
Presents wrapped in Chinese food menus and skull and crossbones tape.
Trying, quite horribly, to play pool.
Late night excursions to the Hill.
The way Will always pulled out my chair for me when we ate in the Caf.
Screaming “Drew!” on the phone.
The way Will’s voicemail has the word “Yo” in it.
Charles and his walks.
Watching Charles take care of his little brother.
Drew bringing me back pralines from New Orleans.
Hearing Will’s jokes on women’s rights that he read in a book somewhere.
Watching Charles kick all of our butts at pool.
Tyler and the fact that he is Jimmy Neutron.
Will in leather pants.
Will, tissues, and a park bench on a dreary night.
Will and I walking back to Corr under the stars.
The boys’ ongoing argument on who is the most normal roommate.
Hearing the story of their first impression of Drew.
Drew and I as tea connoisseurs.
Will and his bone cracking hugs.
The boys finally discovering the secret behind “my favorite”.
Will carrying my books for me one day.
Will and Drew bringing me food at rehearsal.
Learning the “Jump on it” dance.
Wearing the sweatshirt Will lent me.
Holding hands.
Our first kiss.
I am going to miss you so, so much. I just want to say thank you for everything. Thank you a million times over. I love you all so much and I miss you already; tears are still sliding down my cheek as I write this.
You have such a special place in my heart and I sincerely hope our paths cross again. You are the greatest hope I could ever have wished for going to Mass in this time of crisis and although it was unexpected, although it never should have happened, our meeting has impacted my life in so many ways.
I’ve head it said
That people come into our lives
For a reason
Bringing something we must learn
And we are led to those who help us most to grow
If we let them
And we help them in return.
Well I don’t know if I believe if that’s true
But I know I am who I am today because I knew you.
Like a comet pulled from orbit as it passes the sun
Like a stream that meets a boulder half way through the wood
Who can say if I’ve been changed for the better?
But because I knew you,
I have been changed for good.
It well may be
That we will never meet again
in this lifetime
So let me say before we part
So much of me is made of what I learned from you
You’ll be with me like a handprint on my heart.
And now whatever way our stories end
I know you have rewritten mine by being my friend.
Like a ship blown from its mooring
By a wind off the sea
Like a sea drop by a sky bird in a distant world
Who can say if I’ve been changed for the better?
But because I knew you, I have been changed for good.
I do believe I have been changed for the better
And because I knew you, I have been changed for good.