(no subject)
So, a few things. Perhaps I'm only writing for myself and my own record, but here goes. I've been really caught up in my own life lately, and not spending time maintaining relationships with people. I sign into LiveJournal twice a year, and I feel really bad when I read that I've missed so much in others' lives. It makes me doubt the person that I thought I was, but also makes me wonder if this happens to others too. I feel like I just can't do the casual hang-out anymore, because it always turns into a drinkfest. I'm sad to say that this does not appeal to me.
So in the next two weeks, I need to decided whether or not to go forward with going to grad school. In many ways, I have no idea what this will hold for me. When I think about it, I'm not even sure I want to work in this field anymore, and I don't want to spend a ridiculous amount of money just to be sure of that.
Ok, so the even bigger issue, is me, the dog lover...I finally got a dog. Dave and I adopted a beautiful beast, a huge two year old white german shepherd. We changed his name to Oxford. Ox for short. We had to create and embellish a story to allow management to approve us to have this dog in our apartment. But bottom line, they approved. He had lived in a kennel for over a year, and the previous owner couldn't keep him because of financial constraints. Once we got him home on August 8th, he just took to us so quickly, and we became like gods to him. He is this 110 pound white shadow, following Dave and I from room to room, traveling back and forth between us, not even letting us out of sight. In the first two days, he remembered all the basic commands. Behaviorally, he has been so good around the other tenants, and he is very well controlled on a leash. People constantly comment on how beautiful and well behaved he is. Unfortunately, he is getting a little more protective of us. On a walk last week, he started barking at an old lady who came too close, and on Saturday night, he barked at a little girl in the building. That occasion especially scared me, and made me so sad at the thought that word might get out, and he would have to leave. Saturday night I cried so hard just thinking about losing him, and also being so afraid of what he could do to someone. So we decided that until we could teach him NOT to be so protective, we would keep him far away from everyone and anyone.
Well, we found out today that we won't really have that chance. Our apartment manager called Dave and told him that he'd received many written complaints about the size of the dog, and that some tenants are afraid of him. Our building consists mainly of older residents who have not much to do other than complain. He also told us not to use the elevator anymore, but to use the stairs. (I tried to take Ox down the stairs this morning, but he just froze! He's such a baby, and he's never been exposed to stairs before.) Dave just spent the morning calling around to his family members to see who could watch Ox on a temporary basis, or even to find an alternative home for Ox. We can't bring him back to the kennel, because we are fairly certain he would be euthanized. We're so heart-broken, and incredibly pissed at the residents in the building. As I was bringing Ox in from his walk this morning, I had to walk past two of the residents. One of them smiled and pointed at Ox and stated to the other, "That's the dog I was telling you about." I held back my "fuck you" face.
Oh, and the manager just called Dave again, and told him that in addition to having Ox use the stairs, he has to be muzzled. And he has to be out of the apartment in a matter of days.
Ox is laying on the floor moping. He can tell that something is going on. My stomach hurts, and I'm in tears just thinking of this.
Our lease is up at the end of this month, and we were planning on going month to month until December, when we plan to buy a house. But at this point we're both saying fuck it, let's find another place to stay for four months.
I'm writing this basically to vent somewhere, to put it down somewhere that people can be so cruel. I don't know. If anyone reads this and can think of any options, let me know. If not, I'll update in another six months as a completely different person. I hope everyone is doing well. Whether I say it directly or not, I really miss you all a lot.
So in the next two weeks, I need to decided whether or not to go forward with going to grad school. In many ways, I have no idea what this will hold for me. When I think about it, I'm not even sure I want to work in this field anymore, and I don't want to spend a ridiculous amount of money just to be sure of that.
Ok, so the even bigger issue, is me, the dog lover...I finally got a dog. Dave and I adopted a beautiful beast, a huge two year old white german shepherd. We changed his name to Oxford. Ox for short. We had to create and embellish a story to allow management to approve us to have this dog in our apartment. But bottom line, they approved. He had lived in a kennel for over a year, and the previous owner couldn't keep him because of financial constraints. Once we got him home on August 8th, he just took to us so quickly, and we became like gods to him. He is this 110 pound white shadow, following Dave and I from room to room, traveling back and forth between us, not even letting us out of sight. In the first two days, he remembered all the basic commands. Behaviorally, he has been so good around the other tenants, and he is very well controlled on a leash. People constantly comment on how beautiful and well behaved he is. Unfortunately, he is getting a little more protective of us. On a walk last week, he started barking at an old lady who came too close, and on Saturday night, he barked at a little girl in the building. That occasion especially scared me, and made me so sad at the thought that word might get out, and he would have to leave. Saturday night I cried so hard just thinking about losing him, and also being so afraid of what he could do to someone. So we decided that until we could teach him NOT to be so protective, we would keep him far away from everyone and anyone.
Well, we found out today that we won't really have that chance. Our apartment manager called Dave and told him that he'd received many written complaints about the size of the dog, and that some tenants are afraid of him. Our building consists mainly of older residents who have not much to do other than complain. He also told us not to use the elevator anymore, but to use the stairs. (I tried to take Ox down the stairs this morning, but he just froze! He's such a baby, and he's never been exposed to stairs before.) Dave just spent the morning calling around to his family members to see who could watch Ox on a temporary basis, or even to find an alternative home for Ox. We can't bring him back to the kennel, because we are fairly certain he would be euthanized. We're so heart-broken, and incredibly pissed at the residents in the building. As I was bringing Ox in from his walk this morning, I had to walk past two of the residents. One of them smiled and pointed at Ox and stated to the other, "That's the dog I was telling you about." I held back my "fuck you" face.
Oh, and the manager just called Dave again, and told him that in addition to having Ox use the stairs, he has to be muzzled. And he has to be out of the apartment in a matter of days.
Ox is laying on the floor moping. He can tell that something is going on. My stomach hurts, and I'm in tears just thinking of this.
Our lease is up at the end of this month, and we were planning on going month to month until December, when we plan to buy a house. But at this point we're both saying fuck it, let's find another place to stay for four months.
I'm writing this basically to vent somewhere, to put it down somewhere that people can be so cruel. I don't know. If anyone reads this and can think of any options, let me know. If not, I'll update in another six months as a completely different person. I hope everyone is doing well. Whether I say it directly or not, I really miss you all a lot.