hm so yeah uh huh
I am trying despritly to get a circle of friends back. I really want to have a group of people that I can hang out with. I have been reconnecting with bailey as of late, no don't say a thing. I realize that she has drama issues but really she's a nice girl. I mean she's a good friend except for the occasional bad taste comment.
I am just wanting someone to hang out with when Aubrie is busy. This isn't to say that I wouldn't ditch Bailey to hang out with Aubrie so it's cool. But I am an able planner so I don't think that would come up. But yeah. I have been talking to Sarah about it so I hope someone understands.
I got blown off by Heather again last night. I got the whole I've been busy thing. I asked if she was busy now and I received an "uh yeah" and then she signed off. I don't get that. I don't get her. I am this close from just saying fuck it I don't understand how you can be so busy that you can't pick up the phone every so often just to say hi!. I am not asking to hang out I am just asking that you be my friend for five fucking minutes out of your day of 24 hours. But I am sorry for asking so damn much. This is fucked up beyond belief. Friends don't take breaks from friends. Nonsensical.
I am getting a little tired of being the one to call and make conversation. This isn't going to work. It really is not going to work. I can't make this work. How am I supposed to make this work? ::Lisa Tears::
Cry me a fucking river I know. Oh well. Screw you too.
I am just chalk full of grr as of late. I don't know if it'll get better or worse. I am just trying to get by thinking about today.
It helps that school is going alright. My grades are improving if slowly. My teachers are being nice, but then again all my teachers are nice. Connections is keeping me busy and stressed (in a good way).
Family life is getting a little old but it helps that uncle john is there to keep me up on sense and using my head. He really listens to me and I love him so much for it. I asked him if he and aunt susie would mind being my "godparents" and he said that would be great. So now I have "godparents". I am not doing it legally because A)I am not baptised and don't intend on doing so B)I am already 18 so really it's pretty pointless except for making me feel better. I connect with Uncle John so much better than I do anyone in my family. I mean it's just different how he doesn't take excuses but understands that shit happens. He's fantastic and I am excited to see him this summer.
I am thinking that my dad is glad that he lives in michigan away from all the drama down here with antonio and me and mom. I can't wait to see him over spring break but that means that I must sacrifice my visit with him this summer. That makes me sad but it's no different other than time of year.
I am thinking about deleting all the people on my friends list and keep it to a select few on this thing. I am just wanting to maybe keep it to people who actually care about what I have going on. I don't know it's something to think about.
I am getting tired of complaining....actually not so much as I am getting tired of having things to complain about. This blows.
I really really want my nanny. My perfect day right now would be all day in nanny's lap with Al on my lap and all night with scott. Yeah that would make my week. I can dream can't I?
This weekend. Uncle Kurdt's Birhday Party with Aubrie(hopefully) --> saturday...Laundry and whatever someone wants to do if they call me to do it --> Sunday Panera with Bailey --> Monday
Rest of next week is open to negotiation.
Alright I have to go and work on this stupid busy work for ms.dameron.
Adios
Au revoir
Alvitezane (sp?)
Cioa
I am just wanting someone to hang out with when Aubrie is busy. This isn't to say that I wouldn't ditch Bailey to hang out with Aubrie so it's cool. But I am an able planner so I don't think that would come up. But yeah. I have been talking to Sarah about it so I hope someone understands.
I got blown off by Heather again last night. I got the whole I've been busy thing. I asked if she was busy now and I received an "uh yeah" and then she signed off. I don't get that. I don't get her. I am this close from just saying fuck it I don't understand how you can be so busy that you can't pick up the phone every so often just to say hi!. I am not asking to hang out I am just asking that you be my friend for five fucking minutes out of your day of 24 hours. But I am sorry for asking so damn much. This is fucked up beyond belief. Friends don't take breaks from friends. Nonsensical.
I am getting a little tired of being the one to call and make conversation. This isn't going to work. It really is not going to work. I can't make this work. How am I supposed to make this work? ::Lisa Tears::
Cry me a fucking river I know. Oh well. Screw you too.
I am just chalk full of grr as of late. I don't know if it'll get better or worse. I am just trying to get by thinking about today.
It helps that school is going alright. My grades are improving if slowly. My teachers are being nice, but then again all my teachers are nice. Connections is keeping me busy and stressed (in a good way).
Family life is getting a little old but it helps that uncle john is there to keep me up on sense and using my head. He really listens to me and I love him so much for it. I asked him if he and aunt susie would mind being my "godparents" and he said that would be great. So now I have "godparents". I am not doing it legally because A)I am not baptised and don't intend on doing so B)I am already 18 so really it's pretty pointless except for making me feel better. I connect with Uncle John so much better than I do anyone in my family. I mean it's just different how he doesn't take excuses but understands that shit happens. He's fantastic and I am excited to see him this summer.
I am thinking that my dad is glad that he lives in michigan away from all the drama down here with antonio and me and mom. I can't wait to see him over spring break but that means that I must sacrifice my visit with him this summer. That makes me sad but it's no different other than time of year.
I am thinking about deleting all the people on my friends list and keep it to a select few on this thing. I am just wanting to maybe keep it to people who actually care about what I have going on. I don't know it's something to think about.
I am getting tired of complaining....actually not so much as I am getting tired of having things to complain about. This blows.
I really really want my nanny. My perfect day right now would be all day in nanny's lap with Al on my lap and all night with scott. Yeah that would make my week. I can dream can't I?
This weekend. Uncle Kurdt's Birhday Party with Aubrie(hopefully) --> saturday...Laundry and whatever someone wants to do if they call me to do it --> Sunday Panera with Bailey --> Monday
Rest of next week is open to negotiation.
Alright I have to go and work on this stupid busy work for ms.dameron.
Adios
Au revoir
Alvitezane (sp?)
Cioa