skinny...real skinny
I was in my mood yesterday. I was setting up for disappointment just to get it out of the way.I was a destructo bot ready to rip someone's head off at a moments notice. Towards the end of the day I was feeling a little bit better until some stupid sophomore hit me in the head with her balloon as she walked by. I was not exactly thrilled. I wanted to pop that damn thing. But when I got home I called heather and talked to her for about a half an hour. I listened to music and played DS so I could get my mind off of why my phone wasn't ringing and so on. I then got a call from aubrie and got some not so welcome news. I actually was not suprised but I was really hurt and I was about to cry but I am Lisa so I rallied and became a little more than ticked. SO! I called him up and asked him for the truth. He was at work so I said he could call me back. I think he heard the tone in my voice because he asked if it was important. I said it was and asked him the question. I was answered with an unhesitated nope. I said ok, that's all I needed to know. I didn't want to argue with him. 1) he was at work and that's rude...no one needs the stress while at work...not cool. 2)I wanted to believe him so I chose to do so. 3)I had no proof and it's all I can do to believe him. What else is there for me to do? nothing so I can't rely on hearsay and I trust my guy.
He had to get back to work and promised to call me back. I was getting ready to go out to dinner with bry anyway so I agreed. Bry came and picked me up and we went to chilies. I had a good time. Not as good as I would have liked because hell I wasn't with my guy. but what can you do right? ...
He called me during dinner and i excused myself to go talk to him. He asked me why I called him at work to ask him the question and I said 'cause I had to know. I didn't want to walk around not knowing and letting it just sit there in my brain. I trusted his answer because I have no reason not to and I have to trust in the fact that he'd tell me if I asked him the truth. he then asked me what I was doing that night and I said that I was currently out to dinner with my friend...brianna...(ok I know but still what was i supposed to say? I was not going to have him blow up over nothing. It was innocent dinner to celebrate bry's return from the hospital a year ago yesterday) and then I was going home and was free. "free to go out you mean" "yeah if you wanted" "wait I have a car that I can't drive what am I thinking ::sounds frustrated and disappointed::" "probably the same thing i am...wishful..." "yeah well I am just hanging here with dan so..." then he was about to say something...forgot (I don't know about that one but who can tell) said he'd call me back if he remembered and abruptly hung up...I guess he didn't remember. I am assuming that he got shit faced and probably passed out before remembering to call me back but ::Shrugs:: I wonder if he and dan did the guy talk thing...did he talk about me? probably not...dunno.
BUT I had a wonderful time with bry and we ate this monster of a chocolate cake ( TO-DIE-FOR) I don't usually eat desserts but he peer pressured me and I am glad I did it....holy hell wasit good. So then I went home and he hung around with mere and I for a few minutes. He left I went to bed 930 knocked out. I was so exhausted from all this damn....drama I guess is an alright name for it....
THEN middle of the night I am dreaming, I don't remember what about. But I basically forget HOW TO BREATHE. I am gasping for air but my nose won't work and my throat is only allowing the bare minimum of air to get in. I am fighting to breathe still in the spell of the dream. I don't remember what I was dreaming about but I remember not breathing. After what seemed like hours I finally am able to get in a final GASP of air and I sleep on. I didn't wake up once the entire time. I am dead asleep at this point and then my alarm woke me. I remember being so glad that my alarm went off and I remember turning on my light and radio and then falling back to bed with just the intention,like every morning, to doze. But I wake up to mere saying something and I look at the clock 657! HOLY SHIT! I fell dead asleep. I just knocked out. I remember my dream though, very strange. Full of Fire storm tornados, HUGE storm heads and their tornados, railroad tracks, village children, a high tech storm center, and finally the token gay guy. No idea why he was there but he was my partner I think....oh and a couple tourists. It was a strange dream. But I rush to get dressed and do my makeup, and when all was said and done it was already 725. screwed am I. Did I mention that when I woke up I was red eyed and had forgotten to take off my makeup from the night before so I looked like a marilyn manson groupie....I was a mess. Ick factor times 10. But I managed to get myself halfway decent looking and out the door. When I get into the car mere is going on about how she feels for me and how she isn't ignoring my plight with scott and blah blah. I appreciated the sentiment but really she has no idea what is going on. AND BESIDES she keeps bringing up sex. shut up about the sex! seriously. I mean really people. it's like the birds and the bees talk that never stopped. She said stuff like "don't think that making up with him means that you have to give up something youd rather not part with" and stuff like that. ::Groans:: If she only knew heh. But anyway. I get to school at 730 and mrs.grizzle gave me a 5 minute grace and I get to class with my first tardy (which doesn't count). Mrs.Dameron was really nice and while everyone else is typing up thank you letters I am typing here. Being a greeter has its advantages.
I have to go to WV this weekend. Someone kidnap me so I don't have to go.I really don't want to go. I am in no mood to play babysitter to Nathan and visit my cousin who is a dumbass. I don't even like Sue, who is my travel partner, I never have since I was little. She annoys the shit out of me. And I have to spend the night at least once. UGH! I would rather have that time with Scott. BUT looks like I won't. This is getting ridiculous. If I talk to him today I am going to say that I really really want to see him and when he gets off of work I want to be able to come over and do whatever. I really miss the dumb jerk.
....
I am exhausted. Why can't things just ease up for a little while? I think either someone likes me a little too much and is testing me hardcore or someone is having a little too much fun messing with Lisa's life.
^-^ big woman needs to stop. ::yawns::
Sadly I didn't get a chance to retalk to aubrie last night. She was in class so I sent her a text saying "called him and he said nope....I believe him....what else to do?" I wonder if that makes any sense.
I really want a hug. Not any hug, a hug from my man given to me and really not wanting to let go. That would be so nice. And then we can burn a hole in the floor!
I am getting ridiculous and delirious....I need to stop. But I am bored...Who is really going to read all this anyway. I mean really. Not that I am writing for anyone other than me but i find it fascinating that people really have time to read these long entries...it's hilarious... I personally skim...sometimes to look for my name. But on a select couple of people i read every word. :-)
I just put this enty on Word to see how long it was and it just barely made it to 3 pages. Wow. Amanda was just exclaiming that I was still typing. And I just had the strangest conversation about the old addage of tying a string around your finger so you don't forget. Now what happens when you are like HEY I have a string on my finger...why? You forget why you put it therein the first place.. just stupid. But amanda she's smart she wrote it on her hand and she remembered. Thank god for ball point pens. I am just rambling now and really need to stop.
:D thanks for watching
LISAVISION (now in technicolor)
He had to get back to work and promised to call me back. I was getting ready to go out to dinner with bry anyway so I agreed. Bry came and picked me up and we went to chilies. I had a good time. Not as good as I would have liked because hell I wasn't with my guy. but what can you do right? ...
He called me during dinner and i excused myself to go talk to him. He asked me why I called him at work to ask him the question and I said 'cause I had to know. I didn't want to walk around not knowing and letting it just sit there in my brain. I trusted his answer because I have no reason not to and I have to trust in the fact that he'd tell me if I asked him the truth. he then asked me what I was doing that night and I said that I was currently out to dinner with my friend...brianna...(ok I know but still what was i supposed to say? I was not going to have him blow up over nothing. It was innocent dinner to celebrate bry's return from the hospital a year ago yesterday) and then I was going home and was free. "free to go out you mean" "yeah if you wanted" "wait I have a car that I can't drive what am I thinking ::sounds frustrated and disappointed::" "probably the same thing i am...wishful..." "yeah well I am just hanging here with dan so..." then he was about to say something...forgot (I don't know about that one but who can tell) said he'd call me back if he remembered and abruptly hung up...I guess he didn't remember. I am assuming that he got shit faced and probably passed out before remembering to call me back but ::Shrugs:: I wonder if he and dan did the guy talk thing...did he talk about me? probably not...dunno.
BUT I had a wonderful time with bry and we ate this monster of a chocolate cake ( TO-DIE-FOR) I don't usually eat desserts but he peer pressured me and I am glad I did it....holy hell wasit good. So then I went home and he hung around with mere and I for a few minutes. He left I went to bed 930 knocked out. I was so exhausted from all this damn....drama I guess is an alright name for it....
THEN middle of the night I am dreaming, I don't remember what about. But I basically forget HOW TO BREATHE. I am gasping for air but my nose won't work and my throat is only allowing the bare minimum of air to get in. I am fighting to breathe still in the spell of the dream. I don't remember what I was dreaming about but I remember not breathing. After what seemed like hours I finally am able to get in a final GASP of air and I sleep on. I didn't wake up once the entire time. I am dead asleep at this point and then my alarm woke me. I remember being so glad that my alarm went off and I remember turning on my light and radio and then falling back to bed with just the intention,like every morning, to doze. But I wake up to mere saying something and I look at the clock 657! HOLY SHIT! I fell dead asleep. I just knocked out. I remember my dream though, very strange. Full of Fire storm tornados, HUGE storm heads and their tornados, railroad tracks, village children, a high tech storm center, and finally the token gay guy. No idea why he was there but he was my partner I think....oh and a couple tourists. It was a strange dream. But I rush to get dressed and do my makeup, and when all was said and done it was already 725. screwed am I. Did I mention that when I woke up I was red eyed and had forgotten to take off my makeup from the night before so I looked like a marilyn manson groupie....I was a mess. Ick factor times 10. But I managed to get myself halfway decent looking and out the door. When I get into the car mere is going on about how she feels for me and how she isn't ignoring my plight with scott and blah blah. I appreciated the sentiment but really she has no idea what is going on. AND BESIDES she keeps bringing up sex. shut up about the sex! seriously. I mean really people. it's like the birds and the bees talk that never stopped. She said stuff like "don't think that making up with him means that you have to give up something youd rather not part with" and stuff like that. ::Groans:: If she only knew heh. But anyway. I get to school at 730 and mrs.grizzle gave me a 5 minute grace and I get to class with my first tardy (which doesn't count). Mrs.Dameron was really nice and while everyone else is typing up thank you letters I am typing here. Being a greeter has its advantages.
I have to go to WV this weekend. Someone kidnap me so I don't have to go.I really don't want to go. I am in no mood to play babysitter to Nathan and visit my cousin who is a dumbass. I don't even like Sue, who is my travel partner, I never have since I was little. She annoys the shit out of me. And I have to spend the night at least once. UGH! I would rather have that time with Scott. BUT looks like I won't. This is getting ridiculous. If I talk to him today I am going to say that I really really want to see him and when he gets off of work I want to be able to come over and do whatever. I really miss the dumb jerk.
....
I am exhausted. Why can't things just ease up for a little while? I think either someone likes me a little too much and is testing me hardcore or someone is having a little too much fun messing with Lisa's life.
^-^ big woman needs to stop. ::yawns::
Sadly I didn't get a chance to retalk to aubrie last night. She was in class so I sent her a text saying "called him and he said nope....I believe him....what else to do?" I wonder if that makes any sense.
I really want a hug. Not any hug, a hug from my man given to me and really not wanting to let go. That would be so nice. And then we can burn a hole in the floor!
I am getting ridiculous and delirious....I need to stop. But I am bored...Who is really going to read all this anyway. I mean really. Not that I am writing for anyone other than me but i find it fascinating that people really have time to read these long entries...it's hilarious... I personally skim...sometimes to look for my name. But on a select couple of people i read every word. :-)
I just put this enty on Word to see how long it was and it just barely made it to 3 pages. Wow. Amanda was just exclaiming that I was still typing. And I just had the strangest conversation about the old addage of tying a string around your finger so you don't forget. Now what happens when you are like HEY I have a string on my finger...why? You forget why you put it therein the first place.. just stupid. But amanda she's smart she wrote it on her hand and she remembered. Thank god for ball point pens. I am just rambling now and really need to stop.
:D thanks for watching
LISAVISION (now in technicolor)