Mleh.
Commencement
I got started watching the introductory stuff on those videos last night. It's asking me to commit to working on my voice for an hour every day, and I should have results within three months that way. I don't actually have a free hour every day right now, but I'm going to make one somehow. Surely there are things I'm doing that are less important than this, so I need to prioritize.
Om nom FAIL
Well, it finally happened last night: I cooked something that turned out so totally disgusting that I couldn't eat it.
The streak is broken. XD
Naturally, I'd let myself run out of Lean Cuisines in the freezer when this happened, so I ended up just eating some potato chips.
Only tangentially related to that, I think I've ended up doing what I set out not to, which is to set myself up to get burned out on cooking. And especially now that I'm trying to commit to this voice training, I need to be able to just feed myself and get back to other things, without having to work for 30 to 45 minutes in the kitchen. Reminding myself of the original plan: Cooking is for the weekends, leftovers and convenience foods are for weeknights. It'll work better that way.
Basket Case
I've been sort of seeing this coming, but I think I got there today: I'm back to being stupidly emotional and getting all bawly at the drop of a hat. It's not that I hate myself for it, but I do end up feeling a little unstable. ^_^;;
I've let myself start wondering if these negative interpersonal things that've been happening recently aren't mostly my fault--me being too sensitive, me projecting a little self-loathing, that sort of thing. I'm thinking I really need to work on myself a little more before I try to go out and make new friends... I need to at least be able to take a compliment without feeling patronized.
They: "Oh, Jessie, you look great today!"
Me: "Don't give me that crap; I may be a freak, but I'm not stupid."
= Relationship FAIL.
Hell, at that rate, I should probably retreat for a while and get my feelings under control, while I still haven't lost the friends I do have.
---♥---
I am so fucking exhausted. When did I let everything get out of control again? I just need to take some time out, work on myself, and simplify things. Then I can try to get back out there. You can't play baseball with a broken leg right?* I need to heal first before I can expect to make a go of it.
*{Substitute other lame sports metaphor as desired.}
I got started watching the introductory stuff on those videos last night. It's asking me to commit to working on my voice for an hour every day, and I should have results within three months that way. I don't actually have a free hour every day right now, but I'm going to make one somehow. Surely there are things I'm doing that are less important than this, so I need to prioritize.
Om nom FAIL
Well, it finally happened last night: I cooked something that turned out so totally disgusting that I couldn't eat it.
The streak is broken. XD
Naturally, I'd let myself run out of Lean Cuisines in the freezer when this happened, so I ended up just eating some potato chips.
Only tangentially related to that, I think I've ended up doing what I set out not to, which is to set myself up to get burned out on cooking. And especially now that I'm trying to commit to this voice training, I need to be able to just feed myself and get back to other things, without having to work for 30 to 45 minutes in the kitchen. Reminding myself of the original plan: Cooking is for the weekends, leftovers and convenience foods are for weeknights. It'll work better that way.
Basket Case
I've been sort of seeing this coming, but I think I got there today: I'm back to being stupidly emotional and getting all bawly at the drop of a hat. It's not that I hate myself for it, but I do end up feeling a little unstable. ^_^;;
I've let myself start wondering if these negative interpersonal things that've been happening recently aren't mostly my fault--me being too sensitive, me projecting a little self-loathing, that sort of thing. I'm thinking I really need to work on myself a little more before I try to go out and make new friends... I need to at least be able to take a compliment without feeling patronized.
They: "Oh, Jessie, you look great today!"
Me: "Don't give me that crap; I may be a freak, but I'm not stupid."
= Relationship FAIL.
Hell, at that rate, I should probably retreat for a while and get my feelings under control, while I still haven't lost the friends I do have.
---♥---
I am so fucking exhausted. When did I let everything get out of control again? I just need to take some time out, work on myself, and simplify things. Then I can try to get back out there. You can't play baseball with a broken leg right?* I need to heal first before I can expect to make a go of it.
*{Substitute other lame sports metaphor as desired.}