(no subject)
so i do think alot and i do write alot and things make me think. I always wonder if i've made a big mistake. I wonder what i could have done different....i always feel like my life is something out of the ordinary and that some of my situations could only happen in movies. I don't wanna let go but its like what choice do i have. I have to go on...i'll miss it, but its gonna change soon and i'm scared because i dont know what i'm gonna do. Maybe i need you but i try to think that i don't. I did fall soo fast. But i had the right to. I finally graduated today. Today was amazing. I was happy for the first time in a long time. I do get depressed alot. Its little things. Its just cuz i've always taken things seriously and i always think i'm to blame for problems happening. And i guess alot of times i am the person that causes problems. I don't mean to, i have a good heart but i guess sometimes people can take me as being shady and untrustworthy. I just like to ask advice and give info. I don't try to hurt people. I put friends first. I'd give up anything to make sure my friends are happy. I don't get why i get treated like shit sometimes....but then again i do get it. Because i let people walk all over me. I allow them to take my kindness for weakness. But im not weak, i have my strengths but they haven't been shown to me yet. i don't think i've ever stood strong. I'm barely hangin on and i'm not unbreakable. At times i wanna cry. I see things that other people couldn't possibly dream about. The struggles, the hardships that people face. I just have to make myself stronger than that. I have to become the man i know is inside. I won't cry on the outside.