the forgotten sense of touch
it seems worth noting that it's been the better part of a week and i'm still anxiety free. i just finished cleaning the loft and i'm laying on the loveseat watching a couple candles burn down. i was going to watch tv, or read a book, but i'm bored with those ideas. i'm not sure what i want to do, but i'm pretty sure i'm too tired to figure it out.
i was trying to remember the last time i danced with someone, and i can't. the last time i even felt skin beneath my fingertips, or hair between my fingers, was the summer before last. the prince of wands. i haven't spoken to him since june. in a way i hate him more than the emperor. the emperor is insane, what's the prince's damn excuse? idiocy i suppose. not really the point though. the point is i'm afraid i've lost my sense of touch. or the ability to be close to another human being on a physical level. i lay in my bed alone every night, and it rarely bothers me anymore. i can't decide if that's a good thing, or if my passion is drying up and wilting. i don't want to see anyone right now. but i wouldn't mind a little closeness. just so i can remember what it's like to feel.
i was trying to remember the last time i danced with someone, and i can't. the last time i even felt skin beneath my fingertips, or hair between my fingers, was the summer before last. the prince of wands. i haven't spoken to him since june. in a way i hate him more than the emperor. the emperor is insane, what's the prince's damn excuse? idiocy i suppose. not really the point though. the point is i'm afraid i've lost my sense of touch. or the ability to be close to another human being on a physical level. i lay in my bed alone every night, and it rarely bothers me anymore. i can't decide if that's a good thing, or if my passion is drying up and wilting. i don't want to see anyone right now. but i wouldn't mind a little closeness. just so i can remember what it's like to feel.