so less to live for
alot has happened since snowflake died. i don't care to update anymore. everything has been pretty jacked. school especially. why complain? writing about it and thinking it just makes me more angry. i don't have a heart in what i do anymore. so like it all matters. been trying to do things with my life differently. i need major changes. i actually do hw the first thing i get home. a bit scary actually. and i finish well before 5. i no longer go online first. then i have some time for SATs later, unlike my wasted last year. and then my wonderful mood swings. they're just wonderfully great. that's messed me up alot. it's been every freaken day. they should all just go away. but i'm not the same person i was two weeks ago anymore. i've just been eaten away emotionally. everything has just been taken to a higher extreme. and i don't even feel like i have the energy to go out or do anything anymore. and since then, i've always been drained. school is a pain in the ass. esteban won't stop talking. i hate it wen he taps me or comes close or sticks his hand into my space. ::thank goodness i don't have to smell his thick colonge anymore:: and sometimes with him it gets to the insane point where i just smile and nod and turn around ASAP. everything has been such a drag. i just don't even freakne care anymore. only thing i have left to look foward to is seeing ross and getting a new dog. not that much of getting a new dog tho. thoughts have just turned my brain into a jumbled mess.
two good things have happened today
1.rossy mossy came over and YAY. nothing better than seeing him all nice and yummy
2.i saw ray adams again~! ::gushes:: hahaha. the only underclassmen that looks pretty damn cute. others are blah, but man, ray.
agalsoff needs to cut his damn hair. he was cuter last year. i hate his voice tho. so different from last year, i think. i had all those hot white guys to drool over wen they were seniors. used to be my motivation to get up and go to school and days after. oh well. i don't need to much anymore. pavloff isn't as cute anymore. must be because i got over nick. but there are guys with nice hair that catches my eye. wahtevers. tired.
two good things have happened today
1.rossy mossy came over and YAY. nothing better than seeing him all nice and yummy
2.i saw ray adams again~! ::gushes:: hahaha. the only underclassmen that looks pretty damn cute. others are blah, but man, ray.
agalsoff needs to cut his damn hair. he was cuter last year. i hate his voice tho. so different from last year, i think. i had all those hot white guys to drool over wen they were seniors. used to be my motivation to get up and go to school and days after. oh well. i don't need to much anymore. pavloff isn't as cute anymore. must be because i got over nick. but there are guys with nice hair that catches my eye. wahtevers. tired.