(no subject)
After seeing and loving There Will Be Blood twice, I decided to watch the one Paul Thomas Anderson movie I hadn't seen. So I just finished watching Magnolia, and I liked it. But I didn't enjoy it. There's too much truth, and the feelings are too close to what I and other regular people know.
I loved There Will Be Blood and No Country for Old Men. I like bleak movies like that. I want the bad guy to get away, I want to watch people who don't have any remorse for killing others or fucking with people. I think I envy those characters. It must be great to not have to feel guilt or sadness. After I watch movies like that, I get this great feeling inside. I don't know how to explain it. It's almost an elated feeling.
I don't care what anyone says. All of those cliches, 'better to have loved and lost than to have never loved at all', or-- I don't fucking know. But it's all bullshit. I would give anything to feel less. To be more easily pleased, or to be colder. Not only to not need anyone, but to not want anyone else. I wish I could be like Daniel Plainview or Anton Chigurh; or fuck, even Sgt. Bob Barnes from Platoon. I look up to characters like that.
It's just not fucking worth it to feel this much.
I loved There Will Be Blood and No Country for Old Men. I like bleak movies like that. I want the bad guy to get away, I want to watch people who don't have any remorse for killing others or fucking with people. I think I envy those characters. It must be great to not have to feel guilt or sadness. After I watch movies like that, I get this great feeling inside. I don't know how to explain it. It's almost an elated feeling.
I don't care what anyone says. All of those cliches, 'better to have loved and lost than to have never loved at all', or-- I don't fucking know. But it's all bullshit. I would give anything to feel less. To be more easily pleased, or to be colder. Not only to not need anyone, but to not want anyone else. I wish I could be like Daniel Plainview or Anton Chigurh; or fuck, even Sgt. Bob Barnes from Platoon. I look up to characters like that.
It's just not fucking worth it to feel this much.