Dad: Do you believe in ghosts or the afterlife?
Uh-oh. He knows I don't. Where is he going with this?
Me (apprehensively): I'm an atheist.
Dad: That doesn't mean you can't believe in ghosts or the afterlife.
Me: That's exactly what it means, Dad. You're an atheist. You're the one who taught me to be skeptical!
I live in a crazy house.
Going to Maine to live with and take care of my great aunt's widow, BRB. (I'm only considering it. And why is Maine a lesbian mecca?)
ETA: OH, GOD, AND HE SNORES SO LOUDLY. THUNDER THROAT IS GO!