(no subject)
By now all of the soldiers who were affiliated with Autobase had learned to recognize at least a few of the Transformers' expressions. The aliens' faces weren't particularly expressive by human standards, but the way they carried themselves was another story. Once you had the hang of looking for the tilt of a shoulder or the line of a back, you were in much better shape It wasn't infallible, of course, but then- as Epps pointed out- it wasn't as if even an old married man like Lennox could tell what his own wife was going through all the time just by looking at her, let alone a giant alien robot. You did your best and usually that worked out pretty well.
Of course, you had to be paying attention at all for it to work. Corporal Wasserman (doomed to the position of New Guy until someone else came along with enough of a clearance to boot him up the human contingent's hierarchy) was a little too distracted to notice the gradual bunching and shifting of Ironhide's shoulders as the weapons specialist scanned through the Internet. He scarcely had time to notice the mech's sudden sharp forward lean, which his compatriots well knew by now meant irritation about to peak- but he definitely realized what was going on when Ironhide burst out with a blistering "Mine tailings, all of it!" and whipped around to look for the nearest human.
"I have been trying to access some information on the Web about the coming human celebrations, but your web pages are half poisoned with BLINK and MARQUEE and flashing pictures and horrible MIDI files. All the capacitors between my head and my center section are throbbing from trying to plough through it."
"Erp," said Corporal Wasserman. "I'm sorry?"
It almost seemed as if Ironhide were gritting his nonexistent teeth for a moment; then the Autobot nodded. "Fine. Not your fault. You don't write computer code, do you."
Corporal Wasserman shook his head mutely.
"Fine," Ironhide repeated. "Maybe you can help me anyway. You told me about one holiday already, the day of averted genocide-"
"Purim, yeah-"
"Good. Then tell me about the other one." After a moment, Ironhide remembered to add, "Please."
"Uh- what, Hanukkah? That's-"
"No, no, I know that one, that was easy. The civil war, the revolt, the sacred building retaken, the supplies that lasted longer than they should, it's simple enough. I mean the other one. Christmas."
"Um," said Corporal Wasserman, and looked over his shoulder desperately, but all the other humans had fled the room.
Of course, you had to be paying attention at all for it to work. Corporal Wasserman (doomed to the position of New Guy until someone else came along with enough of a clearance to boot him up the human contingent's hierarchy) was a little too distracted to notice the gradual bunching and shifting of Ironhide's shoulders as the weapons specialist scanned through the Internet. He scarcely had time to notice the mech's sudden sharp forward lean, which his compatriots well knew by now meant irritation about to peak- but he definitely realized what was going on when Ironhide burst out with a blistering "Mine tailings, all of it!" and whipped around to look for the nearest human.
"I have been trying to access some information on the Web about the coming human celebrations, but your web pages are half poisoned with BLINK and MARQUEE and flashing pictures and horrible MIDI files. All the capacitors between my head and my center section are throbbing from trying to plough through it."
"Erp," said Corporal Wasserman. "I'm sorry?"
It almost seemed as if Ironhide were gritting his nonexistent teeth for a moment; then the Autobot nodded. "Fine. Not your fault. You don't write computer code, do you."
Corporal Wasserman shook his head mutely.
"Fine," Ironhide repeated. "Maybe you can help me anyway. You told me about one holiday already, the day of averted genocide-"
"Purim, yeah-"
"Good. Then tell me about the other one." After a moment, Ironhide remembered to add, "Please."
"Uh- what, Hanukkah? That's-"
"No, no, I know that one, that was easy. The civil war, the revolt, the sacred building retaken, the supplies that lasted longer than they should, it's simple enough. I mean the other one. Christmas."
"Um," said Corporal Wasserman, and looked over his shoulder desperately, but all the other humans had fled the room.