(Untitled)

[not_that_spike]

A few weeks ago, standing on a hill looking out at the lights of Paris in the distance, Beth told him what she missed about not being here. It was something so simple and so perfect that it made him yearn for this place like he hadn't in months.

The way you smell.
Especially after a shower.
Especially after a shower I took with you.It broke his

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[stbethadettes]

One of her hands hovers about an inch or two from her mouth, the cigarette he gave her between her fingers, but the other, matchbook neatly sandwiched by her thumb and forefinger, rests on his chest in proprietary contentment.

She may have slept with the only two adult males they've had on the planet back home, but Yorick was never hers. No matter how nicely they fit together or how great it felt after two years of no sex and and no men and only occasional companionship. There wasn't a part of him that wasn't so fucking delicious she could've resisted it once he kissed her, even though that's something Hero might never be able to believe.

But he was never hers, and while she can't deny she kind of wished he was back then -- she's only human -- it's always been okay.

Especially now.

For all that she hopes Yorick and Beth Junior get to meet one day, there are few things better than this: Spike, fresh from the shower, by her side in their own bed, her sleeping daughter safe in her crib in the next room, and that general good-mood haze that usually follows a shower with Spike making everything that much better.

Yeah. She fucking missed this.

"I made that much of an impression on you?"

She's a little surprised -- it hadn't been long at the time since Julia died in his arms -- but not a whole damn lot. Spike was never what she'd call easy to read, but to get past his seeming nonchalance enough after a few nights that he was making sketches of the layout of the Bebop for her... well, that's kind of telling.

She'd thought it was stunningly sweet of him.

"Well, you're a fine one to talk about impressions. You made a pretty good one yourself that night, bounty hunter."

[not_that_spike]

Deep down inside, he believes that taking the time to talk with her that first night they met was the best thing he ever did without knowing in advance just how smart it was. After all, she's turned into his... everything, her and Junior, and he never could have imagined any of this three years ago. No, he was pretty damn self-sufficient, pretty okay being by himself. He didn't know he was as starved for... what was it? attention? interaction? contact? whatever it was, but he knows she made exactly the impression he remembers her making.

And like he said, she's still making impressions on him. He thinks he knows her pretty damn well, but she still has this unique ability to surprise the hell out of him. For instance, he wouldn't have put money on her deciding to walk through that door in the church. In fact, she's been so bound and determined to get to Paris and to find Yorick, insistent on Junior meeting him, that her yes shocked him like no one's business.

He has absolutely no complaints about being here. It's just that he's spent six months or so getting used to the idea they wouldn't be back again, so... yeah. She keeps him on his toes, and he's always said he likes a woman who can kick his ass. Either literally or figuratively.

"We're a regular mutual admiration society, Slim." She's right here, and he has to take advantage of it while he can; his fingers take in the feel of her skin beneath them the way a teabag soaks up hot water. He loves her and he never, ever wants to be apart from her. In fact, the times they've been separated have been the toughest times of his life. And he remembers the sinking feeling in the pit of his stomach when he realized Julia was never going to show up to leave Mars with him. He remembers it really well, with this startling clarity and it's not because of his fake eye that holds memories or any of that shit: it's etched into his heart. But even that can't hold a damn candle to the moment he opened that bathroom door in the bar and found himself on Mars with no Beth, no way to find Beth, no one who even remembered Beth. It was like she'd never existed. Like they'd never had this. Like he hadn't spent months rubbing her back and her feet when they were sore from being pregnant; like he'd never told Junior stories deep into the night; like they'd never touched or kissed or even known each other.

That... sucked.

It doesn't suck now. If the past six months have taught him anything other than to take advantage of every last second they have together, it's that they know how to do this thing. They work well together.

They make a damn good couple.

[stbethadettes]

"That's probably putting it mildly."

Catching the side of his chin with two of her fingertips, she gently turns his face toward her for a kiss.

Once she's gotten that, she's satisfied enough to straighten up just a little bit and open that book of matches so she can strike one and light her cigarette.

She can't help feeling like they've come a long way -- and they have, in more ways than one -- and she's proud of them as individuals and proud of them as the unusual family unit that they are.

"You remember the night you told me Joe asked you to be his best man?" She doesn't quite wait for an answer. "And I felt surprised by how sudden it all was?"

It was none of her business, really, and she never actually met Mina but certainly had nothing against her. It just struck her as strange and sudden and she couldn't help it.

"You said something to me about thinking guys like you and Joe were trying grab happiness where you can."

Like it's something so elusive it needs to be held on to firmly once you find it, and when she thought of it in terms like that, it was a hell of a lot easier to understand. It was something she could identify with, but there's always been a part of her that's tried to stubbornly hold back, that's never called the bar in general home, that's never seen the point of Spike offering to go with her to some justice of the peace when she told him she was pregnant.

"I think that's what we can call this. And if we can't leave, I'll won't complain. But if we can, we'll go back and keep doing what we're doing out there."

It won't take forever. There's only so long that it's going to make sense to keep looking for Yorick, and they'll know it when it seems like there's no longer any point to searching.

When that time comes and their little party splits up, she's going to take Spike and Junior somewhere -- if they can't get back here -- that they can all live the most normal life possible.

There's no such thing as the normal she grew up with, whether it's on the other side of the door and here at the bar, and she's okay with that. She's adjusted to a hell of a lot.

But she'll happily take the closest she can get.

[not_that_spike]

There are two things happening that pretty much flood him with this private and personal happiness he'll never share with anyone, not even Beth. Hell, a guy has to have some secrets, doesn't he? This one doesn't fall into the realm of his little promise not to keep anything from Beth. It's just a mood.

The first thing is that kiss she gives him. It isn't that she's never kissed him before, or never kissed him that way, or that this one's more meaningful or somehow different. But it's special, and it's special because they're out in the open and they're not stealing moments, they're not stealing time, they're not stealing affection. It's normal and natural and he loves the hell out of her and he knows he's more vocal about it than Beth, but that little kiss says I love you, bounty hunter almost as loud as the second thing flooding him with happiness.

That second thing is the way he's included in her thinking about the future. Even the immediate future: it wasn't so long ago that her planning was for herself and Beth Junior and not for him. That was understandable, but it hurt a lot, although he wouldn't tell her that. He loves her and he told her a long time ago he wouldn't ever stand in the way of her happiness or of anything she needs to do. He meant it and he still means it, but he sure as hell doesn't want to be apart from her ever again. Not if they can help it. This is... kind of a big thing, even though he won't make a big deal out of it.

It just makes him happy, that's all. And so he nods his agreement, his hands playing over her skin like they haven't stopped doing since they got here. It's like she's brand new, almost, and yeah. Yeah. He could get used to being here easy, but his gut reaction when she talks about not being able to leave surprises him. It's this combination of fuck, we've come so far, I hope we don't have to give up now and stay, if we stay... wouldn't that be sweet? But he's never been one to sit back and settle. Even if the door won't open up for them now, it might some day. Or maybe it'll open but to somewhere else, and he's not afraid of taking advantage of a situation.

"I remember that about Joe." His hand finally leaves her just long enough to retrieve the ashtray; that goes on his legs for her ease of reach. "And it was true. No matter where we end up, I'm always going to feel like the luckiest damn guy in the universe as long as we're together, Beth. I love you. I love Beth Junior. I'm... pretty damn fond of our family whether it's here or in Paris or in New France or on Mars or out by the lake or on Europa or back in Cooksfield." He's said it enough that it could be his mantra, but it bears repeating. "Anywhere with you."

For now, he grabs himself a new cigarette because he can. He's an opportunist, after all.

[stbethadettes]

"How about Eleuthera?"

It's completely out of the question, but it's as interesting to think about as it always was. And last time they joked about it there wasn't a baby around to take into consideration.

"We can grow tobacco and pineapples, and Junior will learn to swim with the dolphins."

It's silly and laughable and somehow still sweet.

Setting her cigarette in the ashtray but not stubbing it out, she turns to Spike and leans into him, wrapping both arms around his neck as if she can hardly believe she's managed to stop touching him since they got here.

What was she thinking? This is what she's been missing and wanting and remembering with this we didn't know how good we had it kind of wistfulness.

"It really would be nice if I let you smoke in peace," -- it's not like she isn't damn glad to have a cigarette herself -- "and started thinking about getting something to eat before our hour's up, but I don't feel very willing to get out of bed with you."

[not_that_spike]

"We've got tobacco and pineapples. Don't see why we'd need anything else." But yeah, he knows what she means and he's maybe even less inclined to get out of bed than she is.

He will, though. He'll do anything for her; it's just the way he is. And it isn't like he gives a damn about smoking in peace: it's all good. If they go down (over?) to the bar, he can smoke there. It's no big deal, especially when her arms wrap around him like she can't get enough, like he's the best sight in the whole damn universe, like they haven't been together for most of the last six months. Hell, he can't keep his hands off her, either: shower or no shower, he'd love it if they could stay here long enough to wake up in each others' arms in the morning. Long enough for Beth Junior to have a comfortable night -- now that she's sleeping through them -- in her own crib. It would be a hell of a thing for all of them, but... not at the expense of their mission out in Paris. Not when they're so close they can smell it, even though the idea of finishing what they went out there to do fills him with a little bit of trepidation.

Whatever: he'll deal with it when and if he has to. But for now, he's got his woman in his arms and he doesn't have to hide himself away, and that... hell, it's worth enjoying. With that in mind, he leans forward and lets his lips drag over hers while she's so close.

He offered before -- at least he thinks he did, although maybe he just thought it -- but he'll do it again. "I can bring food in for us, Slim. We can let Junior sleep longer that way. Bring you anything you want." It's been a long time since he had the opportunity to talk to her this closely without being under that cloak. It's a whole different experience and while the cloak has its definite merits, he kind of likes it better this way. Mostly, he likes it better this way because there's so much opportunity and promise wrapped up in it.

"Eleuthera would be pretty damn perfect." In his mind's eye, he can see her clearly as anything standing naked in that turquoise water, dolphins in the background. Going back there would be fucking incredible and he'd do it in a heartbeat.

[stbethadettes]

Roughing it on Eleuthera like they'd have to in his time or her time would probably lose some of its charm in practice. But the idea of Spike, skin bronzed from the near constant kiss of the sun, wearing only some soft ragged-edged pair of jeans and doing some tobacco farming against a backdrop of island sunset is just...

Well, it brings a very unabashed smile of pure appreciation to her lips.

Plus, the mental image of Junior in a little swimsuit and building her first sandcastle (with lots of help) is really fucking sweet.

But in reality, what they've got right this instant is good. It's really good. Compared to what they just came from, it's almost too good to be true. And it's certainly too good to spend too much time daydreaming rather than soaking up what's right here right now.

Spike's the one who's always said he's an opportunist, but they both know she's one, too.

She kisses his nose first, then his mouth again, then his chin. He's practically asking for it. "Why don't we just eat in here after all?"

Minimal clothing's required in here. And she really would like to let Junior get as much of a nap as possible.

[not_that_spike]

He's missed those days of let's go upstairs and want some? and love you, Beth and he didn't even know how much he's missed them until just now. He gets this little pang at the thought of throwing on a pair of sweats -- clean ones, at that -- and a t-shirt, again clean, and stepping through the portrait and into the bar, ordering dinner for two like he's never been gone. Like they've never been gone, like they've just been holing up here in the House of Arch. No Earth, no invisibility cloak, no lean times, no Israeli army, no Yorick.

No hiding.

In theory, he's missed a few people at the bar and he wouldn't mind running into them: Elaine, Tom, Door, Moiraine. Faye. People like that. But if he doesn't see them... well, shit, they can leave notes this time, because going out again will be intentional.

The words what do you want are right there, right on his lips, but he doesn't ask them quite yet. There has to be a better way to phrase it so it's a little less abrupt, a little more seductive. Yeah, he's good with his hands but he's good with words, too, and he's relaxed as anything right here fresh out of the shower with Beth, but his mind's always busy, always going.

Kissing her lips, then her cheek -- the feel of her skin is so damn electric, just like always -- he lets out a satisfied little sigh. "Just let me know, Slim, if there's anything special you want." He already decided on one of those really big hamburgers but hell, he might splurge and get a whole buffet's worth of food. It's been so long since he could.

And if what Beth says she wants isn't food... well, he's good with that, too.

[stbethadettes]

She could pry herself away and check Joe's watch now, but since she hadn't glanced at it before they got in the shower she has no idea exactly how long it's been since they got back.

"Anything special?"

Tilting her head slightly, she leans the weight of her body against him. There are plenty of answers she could give him, but she thinks she's going to have to go for the plain and serious answer. No matter how much she's smiling at him.

"How fast do you think you can eat?"

[not_that_spike]

"Depends what's for dessert."

That's... probably not the answer she's looking for, but it's the first one that pops out of his mouth and since he's started, he might as well capitalize on it. "I mean, I could get potechi if you're in the mood." Reaching over, he traces the length of her scar with his index finger. It's been a long time since he had the opportunity to do that, and food or not -- meeting up again with Hero or not -- he's not going to pass it up.

"But seriously? I can eat as fast as I have to." He's never been bad at wolfing down his food, but the past six months have turned that into something of an art form for him. He knows one thing he's definitely getting before they leave for Paris again, and that's lots and lots and lots of trail mix and jerky and dried fruit and things like that. Hell, maybe Bar even has those dehydrated food packs, the ones where you just add water and they spring back into form as a whole meal. He has some of those stashed away in the lockbox on the Swordfish, come to think of it, or at least he used to. They probably expired a few years ago.

All this thought of food makes his stomach growl; he directs Beth's hand to the flat of his stomach. He knows he's skinnier than he was six months ago, not like he had any extra to lose in the first place. But it's okay. The alternative was staying here and getting fat alone.

And wouldn't that have been just fucking great.

"What do you want me to bring back for us?"

(He's easy.)

[stbethadettes]

She gives him a look that's probably nearly surprised enough in its delight to make someone think she'd forgotten what it's like to be blatantly flirted with.

(Well, it has been a while since they had the luxury of the time and opportunity for that kind of thing.)

It wasn't the first answer she was expecting -- though maybe it should've been -- but it's the best answer he could've given her, and she touches her forehead to his, feeling like she's grinning like a goddamn fool.

And as her fingers splay over his stomach, she can't possibly resist stealing another kiss. "I don't want you to go anywhere just yet."

The real issue is how much time she can spend with him just like this. Food will be nice and she really is sort of determined that they -- especially Spike -- get something filling to eat before they leave, but she just can't help wanting to stretch this particular moment out as long as she can get away with it.

[not_that_spike]

Well, damn: he doesn't want to go anywhere just yet either. It's the two of them alone together in their own room wearing nothing but towels, with Junior asleep in her crib. They haven't had an opportunity like this one in six months and he's not going to be the practical one here. He's never rushed out of a situation like this his entire life, and he won't start now.

"Tell you what." She's right here, just begging to be made out with, as if they're sixteen-year-olds who finally got the car on a Friday night. "Let's wait till Junior wakes up. Then I'll go get us some food, and if Hero's there waiting, I'll bring her back with me and we can all eat together." That whole hour limitation was kind of made in the heat of the moment, when they were all still astonished they'd found this place and besides, they haven't had good relaxed time with Hero either. They all kind of deserve to be able to take a deep, deep breath and just fucking relax.

"How's that sound?" As if he can resist her: she's always been his biggest weakness. With her hand still playing on his no-longer-rumbling stomach, he steals one kiss and then another and then another... and then he stops counting them. All he knows is how good this all is right here and right now. Fuck Paris, fuck food. Fuck Yorick. Fuck invisibility cloaks and the Israeli army and hiding and searching. Fuck all of it.

He's got Beth.