sniff sniff
well, what a day it has been.
slept many hours last night due to some nyquil. it sorta helped? i have a rotten cold again which can be directly attributed to our dear friend shane who blew germs on me two consecuative days. (friday night being at the hilary hahn concert, and saturday at the MPO concert/gig.) gr- he should be shot for this, it is not a pleasant cold, i'm so DRIPPY. i'm on more nyquil right now, so i will be promptly collapsing as soon as i finish this.
spent time doing the apt/condo viewing w/ grams and gramps. makes me so sad. i can't hardly stand it. i just want to rewind or fastforward time. makes me physically ill. my poor grandpa and grandma. i'm so thankful for them. i just don't know what to do. i get so tired of everything, but i can't not do anything. i have to much conviction to say no, and then even when i've done so much i feel guilty for not doing more. ugh. i need help.
got an interesting phone call today. yea. made me think about how things could be. and what i would/wouldn't do in both situations. it's tough. i'm a bit speechless. all i can say is.. "He's got the whole world in His hands." not much else to say. a very difficult situation to imagine. and yes, i know i'm being vague. i'm writing to clear my own mind rather than talking so i gotta write it down, but i don't have to be specific. that's my right. not that it matters either way really. blah blah blah again. pray is all i can do.. and not even that well.
i'm sleepy. i have a meeting at work tomorrow. i need to do hw tomorrow. i need to get healthy real fast (before friday). church tomorrow, and life-long time.. least that's the tenative plan now. if i still feel like this i may pass though. we'll see.
went to dad's cause he's working 7-7 this week. it was nice to be down there with just the girls and him. no pat. it was nice. except the dumb cat. the dumb cat that has another new name this week... "cleatus" -i think this maybe be the 4th name the thing has had. yuck~ speaking of yuck and animal in the same sentence.. hannah lost a dog this past week. apparently very unexpectedly of a disease. she was super upset. i can be so heartless (at least internally). i sent my "condolences" but really i don't understand grief over animals. i don't see personality in them, i don't like them. it makes more sense to me to mourn the death of your favorite shirt in a washer or dryer accident. or the injury of a couch/something you paid lots of money for. its terrible i know. just don't get it. people and animals aren't even comparable in my emotional mind. i have some guilt about this, but not much. sorry animal lovers.
well that's all for now. i'm sleepy. nyquil kicking in finally.
slept many hours last night due to some nyquil. it sorta helped? i have a rotten cold again which can be directly attributed to our dear friend shane who blew germs on me two consecuative days. (friday night being at the hilary hahn concert, and saturday at the MPO concert/gig.) gr- he should be shot for this, it is not a pleasant cold, i'm so DRIPPY. i'm on more nyquil right now, so i will be promptly collapsing as soon as i finish this.
spent time doing the apt/condo viewing w/ grams and gramps. makes me so sad. i can't hardly stand it. i just want to rewind or fastforward time. makes me physically ill. my poor grandpa and grandma. i'm so thankful for them. i just don't know what to do. i get so tired of everything, but i can't not do anything. i have to much conviction to say no, and then even when i've done so much i feel guilty for not doing more. ugh. i need help.
got an interesting phone call today. yea. made me think about how things could be. and what i would/wouldn't do in both situations. it's tough. i'm a bit speechless. all i can say is.. "He's got the whole world in His hands." not much else to say. a very difficult situation to imagine. and yes, i know i'm being vague. i'm writing to clear my own mind rather than talking so i gotta write it down, but i don't have to be specific. that's my right. not that it matters either way really. blah blah blah again. pray is all i can do.. and not even that well.
i'm sleepy. i have a meeting at work tomorrow. i need to do hw tomorrow. i need to get healthy real fast (before friday). church tomorrow, and life-long time.. least that's the tenative plan now. if i still feel like this i may pass though. we'll see.
went to dad's cause he's working 7-7 this week. it was nice to be down there with just the girls and him. no pat. it was nice. except the dumb cat. the dumb cat that has another new name this week... "cleatus" -i think this maybe be the 4th name the thing has had. yuck~ speaking of yuck and animal in the same sentence.. hannah lost a dog this past week. apparently very unexpectedly of a disease. she was super upset. i can be so heartless (at least internally). i sent my "condolences" but really i don't understand grief over animals. i don't see personality in them, i don't like them. it makes more sense to me to mourn the death of your favorite shirt in a washer or dryer accident. or the injury of a couch/something you paid lots of money for. its terrible i know. just don't get it. people and animals aren't even comparable in my emotional mind. i have some guilt about this, but not much. sorry animal lovers.
well that's all for now. i'm sleepy. nyquil kicking in finally.