Rebel 30 [Action!]
[It's been replaying in her mind over and over for days now: "Fight the future, not the past." She remembers Thirteen saying it so clearly even though it was so many months ago. And even though it struck her hard back then, now, it just won't leave her. Maybe it's the new year looming just over the horizon, but for whatever reason, it's been echoing in her mind all day.
Fight the future...
It's been so long since the whole mess with Sector Seven. Over three years, as far as she's concerned. And especially here, with the Boundary cut off from her at last and a "family" here to support and live for... is there really any reason to keep fighting something so long gone? Isn't it about time to let go and look to the future?
...Shouldn't it not be so hard to let go?
It's the guilt. She knows it's the guilt that's making things far harder than they should be. And beneath that guilt, she knows somewhere she still has some sort of feelings for the one she loved and lost, but she isn't sure anymore where the guilt ends and the love begins.
There's also a different kind of guilt, come to think of it... guilt that she can't make up her mind whether to just let go once and for all or stay true to her past.
The future... not the past.
She knows: she has to make up her mind soon before this gets any further out of hand. She can't drag out the decision for another year. She has to move on or...
...Or give up on building a new future with the people she loves here. On starting things anew completely, once and for all. On letting herself just be happy with how things are rather than dredging up old guilt.
...Why is this so hard...?]
[Today, a few hours before sundown, Litchi heads out for a walk. Normally, she'd be stopping several times along the way to talk to people or stop in a store, but today, she just looks quiet and withdrawn. Her troubles are clear on her face, but despite the cold and the snow covering the ground, she'll be out until well after sundown.
It's time to get her thoughts straight. Time to decide -- move on? Or keep clinging to the hope that somehow, things will go back to how they were so long ago?
While she's out walking, she'll make a slow circle through the entire village. Anyone running into her around the village is sure to notice her distracted demeanor, but she won't exactly turn down anyone to talk to (in fact, she could probably use that right about now). Eventually, she'll find her way back to House 48 and stop uncertainly halfway up the walkway.
...It's now or never.]
Fight the future...
It's been so long since the whole mess with Sector Seven. Over three years, as far as she's concerned. And especially here, with the Boundary cut off from her at last and a "family" here to support and live for... is there really any reason to keep fighting something so long gone? Isn't it about time to let go and look to the future?
...Shouldn't it not be so hard to let go?
It's the guilt. She knows it's the guilt that's making things far harder than they should be. And beneath that guilt, she knows somewhere she still has some sort of feelings for the one she loved and lost, but she isn't sure anymore where the guilt ends and the love begins.
There's also a different kind of guilt, come to think of it... guilt that she can't make up her mind whether to just let go once and for all or stay true to her past.
The future... not the past.
She knows: she has to make up her mind soon before this gets any further out of hand. She can't drag out the decision for another year. She has to move on or...
...Or give up on building a new future with the people she loves here. On starting things anew completely, once and for all. On letting herself just be happy with how things are rather than dredging up old guilt.
...Why is this so hard...?]
[Today, a few hours before sundown, Litchi heads out for a walk. Normally, she'd be stopping several times along the way to talk to people or stop in a store, but today, she just looks quiet and withdrawn. Her troubles are clear on her face, but despite the cold and the snow covering the ground, she'll be out until well after sundown.
It's time to get her thoughts straight. Time to decide -- move on? Or keep clinging to the hope that somehow, things will go back to how they were so long ago?
While she's out walking, she'll make a slow circle through the entire village. Anyone running into her around the village is sure to notice her distracted demeanor, but she won't exactly turn down anyone to talk to (in fact, she could probably use that right about now). Eventually, she'll find her way back to House 48 and stop uncertainly halfway up the walkway.
...It's now or never.]