"Excuse me, ma'am. I believe these are your panties? You see, I retrieved them from your room while you were sleeping to arouse my perverse sexual lust and I'd simply like to return them to you now.
Only if you're Jewish. Besides, you're not supposed to do it with them in the room! Then they'd just call the police. The whole idea is that you surprise them with their pants later--like a gift!
I believe the definition of 'gift' excludes articles that formerly belonged to the recipient in the first place. The phrase you're thinking of is, "like an invitation to be assaulted until you bleed."
Shouldn't you have progressed past the panty-stealing phase at about 15 or so? No one gives points for originality; they only give points if you score.
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Well. I still like to get to know my lady friends first before I start stealing their underwear.
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How about a date on Friday?"
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*Nathan--master of hitting on girls!*
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How old am I? I can't actually remember, but I'd say about 18 or 19.
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