12 days.
12 days to communication black out for i dont know how long. Graduation might as well be a dress rehearsal for all i will have time to do anything other than march, strip/change clothes and pack up to vanish first thing in the morning. its going to be amazingly difficult with 5 guests staying in my apartment at least. Existential fears and having to hit the ground running despite numerous backfires in take off prep are really getting to me. This is going to be so close as to be worthy of a Nobel prize for accomplishing it. 3 months with no income and 2 months with a bank trying to eat what i can on the way out (a magical juggle wound up costing me 50 bucks for a gallon of milk for a round tally of almost 400 bucks gone which were all needed for take off prep)now to cut the moorings, get phone activated for when we arrive, get a job as soon as we land and keep running from that point forward. I wonder at what point any further education will be possible, or if thats going to be another pipe dream.
For what its worth, i am only complaining about the negatives here. The world i had to leave behind so quickly, has opened its arms equally fast to take me back in. Despite the chasm widening before me on approach to take off, what remains is a leap of faith once more and to fly like the ground isnt there, which is the only way i can keep pulling these things off...a definite sign of reality re-enforced insanity. i wouldnt dare if it wasnt supported by a history of unexplainable successes, including getting to and through college to begin with.
3 days of classes left and im already missing them. watching these kids with their little flashlights trying to figure out what god means to them this semester has been a revelation in and of itself. If time permits, i will post some of my reflections from this semester, but for now i have to keep "senioritis" from claiming my sanity and get myself to my early morning class.
For what its worth, i am only complaining about the negatives here. The world i had to leave behind so quickly, has opened its arms equally fast to take me back in. Despite the chasm widening before me on approach to take off, what remains is a leap of faith once more and to fly like the ground isnt there, which is the only way i can keep pulling these things off...a definite sign of reality re-enforced insanity. i wouldnt dare if it wasnt supported by a history of unexplainable successes, including getting to and through college to begin with.
3 days of classes left and im already missing them. watching these kids with their little flashlights trying to figure out what god means to them this semester has been a revelation in and of itself. If time permits, i will post some of my reflections from this semester, but for now i have to keep "senioritis" from claiming my sanity and get myself to my early morning class.