Teeter Totter
1. Uttered my first words to Brenna in a couple days. It’s not enough.
2. Ditto with Emili.
3. And Megan.
4. Sammy & Claire & Alex
5. Played cards with Jack and sat in trees and floors and talked.
6. Rosy left a message on my machine.
7. Anyel & Alex did too.
8. Reid came over and told me my future. (Clubbing at The Escape tomorrow)
9. Mark and Brian stopped by and we devoured all my hummus and iced tea.
There are infinite possibilities and diverging pathways here. And there is always something that I can find to shake my head at and waste nighttime hours tripping over. Negatives are first. But my friends are first too. But I can’t seem to get to all of them. I can’t find the energy and time to get enough. It’s never enough. And again, the situation is changing. Reflecting on my walk home today; things are so much different. I do have power. I do have some amount of control. I forget this too often. I forget that I can direct the path I want to take. As long as I keep my options open I have a ticket to wherever I’d like to go. Maybe that’s egotistical, but it’s true of everyone.
After everything, I still get the feeling someone is angry with me. I still get the feeling that someone is saying exactly what a wandering drifter of a friend I am. Perhaps it’s just a piece of myself talking. I’m paranoid nonetheless.
2. Ditto with Emili.
3. And Megan.
4. Sammy & Claire & Alex
5. Played cards with Jack and sat in trees and floors and talked.
6. Rosy left a message on my machine.
7. Anyel & Alex did too.
8. Reid came over and told me my future. (Clubbing at The Escape tomorrow)
9. Mark and Brian stopped by and we devoured all my hummus and iced tea.
There are infinite possibilities and diverging pathways here. And there is always something that I can find to shake my head at and waste nighttime hours tripping over. Negatives are first. But my friends are first too. But I can’t seem to get to all of them. I can’t find the energy and time to get enough. It’s never enough. And again, the situation is changing. Reflecting on my walk home today; things are so much different. I do have power. I do have some amount of control. I forget this too often. I forget that I can direct the path I want to take. As long as I keep my options open I have a ticket to wherever I’d like to go. Maybe that’s egotistical, but it’s true of everyone.
After everything, I still get the feeling someone is angry with me. I still get the feeling that someone is saying exactly what a wandering drifter of a friend I am. Perhaps it’s just a piece of myself talking. I’m paranoid nonetheless.