Stupid Petty Roommate Things...
I am frustrated. Angry I think is the correct word. My roommate Kat just offered me un-solicited life advice.
"Honey, you need to be more authoratative. It is going to have better results for you in life. It really drives me crazy when you ask everything so nicely."
I happen to feel that we should be able to ask each other things rather than demand things of each other. So yes, I am going to ask you to shut off your appliances when you leave. And I am going to ask you to do your dishes within 24 hours of creating (and leaving) a mess. And I will ask you to put a bag in the bathroom trash after you empty it. And once in while I will even ask you to pick your stuff up off the table.
It is not my job to be telling you these things. As an adult living on her own I expect that I don't need to ask you to be courteous of your roommates. To try to keep the electricity bills low, the common space clean, or the chores partially done, these are just things that I would expect you could do. And if you want simmilar things from me, I'd really rather that you ask me rather than telling me to do something.
Furthermore, I'm only here a few days a week and I expect that you have - just as I have - her own things going on in her head and her life. So I have no idea what you have or have not been doing. And I have no idea why you weren't able to get to the chores or remember me asking you to shut off your appliances. I am bleeding money on this place and the last thing I want to do for the few days I am home is to have to clean up after you.
That being said, you feed the cat, bring in the mail, and keep the house running every day. So another reason that I ask is that it's really not a big enough deal for me to get pushy about. But add all these things together and then top it with you telling me that I should tell you rather than ask you things - be a bit more pushy - that just makes me angry.
My response to her was "Thank you for your advice and I will make a concentrated effort to tell you when something is wrong rather than asking you to change the things you are doing to contribute to my frustration."
AGGGGH, DON'T LEAVE YOUR DIRTY DISHES IN THE SINK FOR MORE THAN 24 HOURS!!!
Stupid petty roommate stuff.
"Honey, you need to be more authoratative. It is going to have better results for you in life. It really drives me crazy when you ask everything so nicely."
I happen to feel that we should be able to ask each other things rather than demand things of each other. So yes, I am going to ask you to shut off your appliances when you leave. And I am going to ask you to do your dishes within 24 hours of creating (and leaving) a mess. And I will ask you to put a bag in the bathroom trash after you empty it. And once in while I will even ask you to pick your stuff up off the table.
It is not my job to be telling you these things. As an adult living on her own I expect that I don't need to ask you to be courteous of your roommates. To try to keep the electricity bills low, the common space clean, or the chores partially done, these are just things that I would expect you could do. And if you want simmilar things from me, I'd really rather that you ask me rather than telling me to do something.
Furthermore, I'm only here a few days a week and I expect that you have - just as I have - her own things going on in her head and her life. So I have no idea what you have or have not been doing. And I have no idea why you weren't able to get to the chores or remember me asking you to shut off your appliances. I am bleeding money on this place and the last thing I want to do for the few days I am home is to have to clean up after you.
That being said, you feed the cat, bring in the mail, and keep the house running every day. So another reason that I ask is that it's really not a big enough deal for me to get pushy about. But add all these things together and then top it with you telling me that I should tell you rather than ask you things - be a bit more pushy - that just makes me angry.
My response to her was "Thank you for your advice and I will make a concentrated effort to tell you when something is wrong rather than asking you to change the things you are doing to contribute to my frustration."
AGGGGH, DON'T LEAVE YOUR DIRTY DISHES IN THE SINK FOR MORE THAN 24 HOURS!!!
Stupid petty roommate stuff.