(no subject)
Application for being My Boyfriend
** All fields are required unless specified **
• × • Section 1: The Contacts • × •
Name:__________
Province/State/Country__________
Contact:
Email:__________
Home Phone Number:__________
Cell Phone Number:__________
Fax Phone Number:__________
Address:__________
Website Address:__________
• × • Section 2: The Basics--Physical • × •
Age and Birthday:__________ if you are old enough to be my father, grandfather, etc. or young enough to be my son, baby brother, etc. Please skip the remainder of this Application and proceed to Section 8)
Height:__________ (if you are less than 5'6", please skip the remainder of this Application and proceed to Section 9)
Weight:__________
Build/Body Type:
__ skinny boy
__ covered in hair so bad u cant even see what your body looks like
__ toned and muscled
__ cuddly teddybear
__ sumo wrestler
__ say hello u got in instant bang me body. . and booty
Eye Colour:__________
Hair Colour:__________
How long is your hair?:__________
Ethnicity:__________
Can you carry me? (Circle one): Yes/No
Can you throw me over your shoulder like a soilder? (Circle one): Yes/No
Do you have facial hair? (Circle one): Yes/No
How much?:__________
How good are you at doing the deed? (circle one): a. ill make you moan like your moms not home b. im a virgin
c. ehh alrigh
× • Section 3: Getting to Know You • × •
Smoke? (circle one):Yes/No
if yes, how often?:__________ (Also, please take note of section 10)
Drugs? (circle one): Yes/No
if yes, please skip the remainder of this Application and proceed to Section 11
Drink? (cirlce one): Yes/No
if yes, how often?:__________
BTW what do you drink _________( dont bother writting down ne pussy drinks i want a man!)
how would you describe yourself when you are drunk?:__________
Any Tattoos or Piercings? (Circle one): Tattoos/Piercings/Both/None
If any, what and were. Describe:__________
Do you watch porn? (Circle one): Yes/No
Are you religious? (Circle one): Yes/No
if yes, of which religion?__________
Are you scared of bugs, lava lamps,snakes,foot socks?___________
• × • Section 4: Getting a Little Deeper • × •
What is your Goal in Life? (may list more than one):__________
What does Success Mean to you?:__________
What do you do for fun? Hobbies?:__________ ( and you better be fun i dont dig you boring boys)
Favourite Books/Authors? (may list up to 3 for each):__________ ( i dont read so this question is B.S)
Favourite Saying?:__________ ( this one better be good)
• × • Section 5: Getting to Know your Family • × •
Siblings? (Circle one): Yes/No
If yes, please list them including their age:__________
Family Type:
Hmmm as long as they like me there good.
__ No Family (you may skip the rest of this section and proceed onto Section 6)
• × • Section 6: Getting to Know your Situation • × •
Financially, you are:
__ skint
__ comfortable
__ caked
__ big my sugar daddy!
Politically, you are:
__ right wing
__ left wing
__ Switzerland
Languages you speak are:__________ ( english is good, if u speak more dont yell at me in them .. thanx)
In the kitchen you can:
__ make gourmet meals
__ make ramen
__ make a reservation ( clever huh?)
You laugh at:
__ Monty Python, Loudly
__ Our so-called Leaders, Bitterly
__ Yourself, regularly
Your Criminal Record is:
__ Flawless
__ One or two mishaps
__ You're in Jail (if you checked this option, please skip the rest of the Application and proceed to section 12
• × • Section 7: Gettin to Know you Intimately • × •
In Relationships, you are:
__ Monogamous
__ Polygamous
__ Desperate
If you have checked either of the last two options, please skip the rest of this Application and proceed to Section 13
Are you easily jealous?:__________
Sexually, you are:
__ Vanilla
__ A little into this, a little into that
__ Deviant
__ Kink-Master!
__ my sex slave
How long do you usually know a girl before you kiss her?:__________
How long do you usually know a girl before you dump her?:__________
What is the longest/shortest relationship you've been in?:__________
Have you ever been married? (Circle one): Yes/No
Do you have kids? How many? Yes/No __________
How often do you want it?:__________
How soon do you want it?:
__ First date!
__ Second date!
__ I can wait until You're ready
If you have checked either of the first two options, please skip the rest of this Application and proceed to Section 14
Your kisses are (may check more than one):
__ smooth
__ sweet
__ a peck
__ aggressive
__ firely, passionate
__ intimate
__ on the cheek
__ where ever i want . .
Your favourite place to be touched/kissed is (other than the obvious!):__________
Anything else I should know about?:__________ ( std creeps im clean stay the Flip away)
• × • Section 8 • × •
Unfortunately, I cannot accept your application at this time, or probably ever. While you are aged and wise beyond my years, I probably will not be able to see you as anything but someone who is old enough to be my father/grandfathe/etc. And, that's just wrong. Please find someone your own age.
Unfortunately, I cannot accept your application at this time. While youthfullness is always a must, you, little boy, are just way too young for me at the moment. Please reapply when I'm having my mid-life crisis and am accepting applications from younger men.
• × • Section 9 • × •
As charming as you may be, I prefer to look up at my boyfriends and not down. When I am wearing heels, I will tower over you. Please try again when you grow a few inches more you shortay!
• × • Section 10 • × •
I hate smoking, but I will "tolerate" it, meaning, I will make faces and bug at you whenever you smoke. Unless is ganja then its A OK by me.. hehe
• × • Section 11 • × •
Depends... if your a rich hott coke head maybe . . poor cracked out losa lata.
• × • Section 12 • × •
I have no intention of dating a felon. The only crime you can commit is stealing my heat<3 <3
• × • Section 13 • × •
You may reapply when you have matured enough to engage in a monogamous relatioinship. Until then, go on spreading your seed wherever you go, you filthy, filthy man
• × • Section 14 • × •
You may reapply when you have matured enough to realize that Not all girls want to sleep with you on the first/second date even if your "pimp" or extremly sexy. Reapplication before that time will result in a slap to the face and a kick to the nuts.
• × • Section 15: The Things I May have Missed • × •
If there is anything else I may have missed or anything else you may want to tell me, please do so in the space below:
______________________________
______________________________
______________________________
______________________________
______________________________
• × • Section 16: The References • × •
Please list at least two references with their full contacts. You may list more if you wish but be aware that I will contact them if for only amusement purposes.
1. ______________________________
2. ______________________________
3. ______________________________
4. ______________________________
5. ______________________________
** All fields are required unless specified **
• × • Section 1: The Contacts • × •
Name:__________
Province/State/Country__________
Contact:
Email:__________
Home Phone Number:__________
Cell Phone Number:__________
Fax Phone Number:__________
Address:__________
Website Address:__________
• × • Section 2: The Basics--Physical • × •
Age and Birthday:__________ if you are old enough to be my father, grandfather, etc. or young enough to be my son, baby brother, etc. Please skip the remainder of this Application and proceed to Section 8)
Height:__________ (if you are less than 5'6", please skip the remainder of this Application and proceed to Section 9)
Weight:__________
Build/Body Type:
__ skinny boy
__ covered in hair so bad u cant even see what your body looks like
__ toned and muscled
__ cuddly teddybear
__ sumo wrestler
__ say hello u got in instant bang me body. . and booty
Eye Colour:__________
Hair Colour:__________
How long is your hair?:__________
Ethnicity:__________
Can you carry me? (Circle one): Yes/No
Can you throw me over your shoulder like a soilder? (Circle one): Yes/No
Do you have facial hair? (Circle one): Yes/No
How much?:__________
How good are you at doing the deed? (circle one): a. ill make you moan like your moms not home b. im a virgin
c. ehh alrigh
× • Section 3: Getting to Know You • × •
Smoke? (circle one):Yes/No
if yes, how often?:__________ (Also, please take note of section 10)
Drugs? (circle one): Yes/No
if yes, please skip the remainder of this Application and proceed to Section 11
Drink? (cirlce one): Yes/No
if yes, how often?:__________
BTW what do you drink _________( dont bother writting down ne pussy drinks i want a man!)
how would you describe yourself when you are drunk?:__________
Any Tattoos or Piercings? (Circle one): Tattoos/Piercings/Both/None
If any, what and were. Describe:__________
Do you watch porn? (Circle one): Yes/No
Are you religious? (Circle one): Yes/No
if yes, of which religion?__________
Are you scared of bugs, lava lamps,snakes,foot socks?___________
• × • Section 4: Getting a Little Deeper • × •
What is your Goal in Life? (may list more than one):__________
What does Success Mean to you?:__________
What do you do for fun? Hobbies?:__________ ( and you better be fun i dont dig you boring boys)
Favourite Books/Authors? (may list up to 3 for each):__________ ( i dont read so this question is B.S)
Favourite Saying?:__________ ( this one better be good)
• × • Section 5: Getting to Know your Family • × •
Siblings? (Circle one): Yes/No
If yes, please list them including their age:__________
Family Type:
Hmmm as long as they like me there good.
__ No Family (you may skip the rest of this section and proceed onto Section 6)
• × • Section 6: Getting to Know your Situation • × •
Financially, you are:
__ skint
__ comfortable
__ caked
__ big my sugar daddy!
Politically, you are:
__ right wing
__ left wing
__ Switzerland
Languages you speak are:__________ ( english is good, if u speak more dont yell at me in them .. thanx)
In the kitchen you can:
__ make gourmet meals
__ make ramen
__ make a reservation ( clever huh?)
You laugh at:
__ Monty Python, Loudly
__ Our so-called Leaders, Bitterly
__ Yourself, regularly
Your Criminal Record is:
__ Flawless
__ One or two mishaps
__ You're in Jail (if you checked this option, please skip the rest of the Application and proceed to section 12
• × • Section 7: Gettin to Know you Intimately • × •
In Relationships, you are:
__ Monogamous
__ Polygamous
__ Desperate
If you have checked either of the last two options, please skip the rest of this Application and proceed to Section 13
Are you easily jealous?:__________
Sexually, you are:
__ Vanilla
__ A little into this, a little into that
__ Deviant
__ Kink-Master!
__ my sex slave
How long do you usually know a girl before you kiss her?:__________
How long do you usually know a girl before you dump her?:__________
What is the longest/shortest relationship you've been in?:__________
Have you ever been married? (Circle one): Yes/No
Do you have kids? How many? Yes/No __________
How often do you want it?:__________
How soon do you want it?:
__ First date!
__ Second date!
__ I can wait until You're ready
If you have checked either of the first two options, please skip the rest of this Application and proceed to Section 14
Your kisses are (may check more than one):
__ smooth
__ sweet
__ a peck
__ aggressive
__ firely, passionate
__ intimate
__ on the cheek
__ where ever i want . .
Your favourite place to be touched/kissed is (other than the obvious!):__________
Anything else I should know about?:__________ ( std creeps im clean stay the Flip away)
• × • Section 8 • × •
Unfortunately, I cannot accept your application at this time, or probably ever. While you are aged and wise beyond my years, I probably will not be able to see you as anything but someone who is old enough to be my father/grandfathe/etc. And, that's just wrong. Please find someone your own age.
Unfortunately, I cannot accept your application at this time. While youthfullness is always a must, you, little boy, are just way too young for me at the moment. Please reapply when I'm having my mid-life crisis and am accepting applications from younger men.
• × • Section 9 • × •
As charming as you may be, I prefer to look up at my boyfriends and not down. When I am wearing heels, I will tower over you. Please try again when you grow a few inches more you shortay!
• × • Section 10 • × •
I hate smoking, but I will "tolerate" it, meaning, I will make faces and bug at you whenever you smoke. Unless is ganja then its A OK by me.. hehe
• × • Section 11 • × •
Depends... if your a rich hott coke head maybe . . poor cracked out losa lata.
• × • Section 12 • × •
I have no intention of dating a felon. The only crime you can commit is stealing my heat<3 <3
• × • Section 13 • × •
You may reapply when you have matured enough to engage in a monogamous relatioinship. Until then, go on spreading your seed wherever you go, you filthy, filthy man
• × • Section 14 • × •
You may reapply when you have matured enough to realize that Not all girls want to sleep with you on the first/second date even if your "pimp" or extremly sexy. Reapplication before that time will result in a slap to the face and a kick to the nuts.
• × • Section 15: The Things I May have Missed • × •
If there is anything else I may have missed or anything else you may want to tell me, please do so in the space below:
______________________________
______________________________
______________________________
______________________________
______________________________
• × • Section 16: The References • × •
Please list at least two references with their full contacts. You may list more if you wish but be aware that I will contact them if for only amusement purposes.
1. ______________________________
2. ______________________________
3. ______________________________
4. ______________________________
5. ______________________________