Is there a winter-ized version of the WIlliam Tell Overture?
Hello all, and welcome to the run-on of running around that is the Holiday season.
I thought I'd take the time to leave an update; that way, if anyone were actually able to take a break from his or her hectic life at this point in time, there would be something new here to feast the eyes upon.
First of all, I have enjoyed spending what brief time I have been able to spend with those of you that I have seen since I've moved back to eastern MA. I hope the season is treating you well. Bobby, Melissa, and anyone else involved in seeing the dueling pianos last week....I wanted to go, but I didn't want any part of driving around on the ice slicks, ahem, roads at that point in time. I'm bummed that I missed a good time with you all. Tony, I'm sorry I missed your gig last night. I would really like to see your Barbershop quartet at some point soon, so I hope you have some more performances.
In news: what is happening to the Red Sox? :(
As far as work goes, well....I'm not liking it so much. Some stuff I am not really at liberty to discuss in a public forum. Let's just say that some companies are wealthy, others are less so. That being said, I was not pressing my boss about if he wanted to send out Holiday gifts, as he has in the past. So I have been told, anyway -- and for the record, I had been saving plenty of gift ordering magazines just in case. Which brings us to my next topic: last Wednesday to today, with the focus on this week so far.
Last Wednesday, I got word that we would be having a very important meeting here in the office, with a few people coming in. Jim (my boss) approaches me and is like, next Wednesday we will need to have the office decorated, a nice spread of croissants, bagels, some fruit, and coffee, that kind of stuff. So, I got the pleasure of decorating two large palm tree-esque trees in the conference room with traditional white lights, and those delightful glass shiny ornaments. It looks lovely. The next project was getting other supplies.
MONDAY of this week, I picked up the non-perishables that I would need - namely: plates, napkins, mugs, candy bowl, some hot cocoa mix. Oh, by that I mean Monday AFTER work. DURING work, Jim approached me with another project. Call this company and order 4 large boxes of chocolate and 6 smaller ones. See if you can get them today.
OK. This is a HANDMADE chocolate company. It is 6 days before Christmas, one of the biggest chocolate holidays of the year, next to Valentine's Day. I give it a shot. She says she could get them done by Wednesday morning to pick up at 7:00 (AM), POSSIBLY Tuesday night. That's nice. Later in the day I add a box to the order, per request of my boss. The rest of the day I signed, printed out addresses on envelopes, and printed out address labels for some 40 Holiday cards. By the way, Jim mentioned I should “take it up a notch” in terms of my attire for Wednesday’s meeting (in all fairness, I asked him what the dress-code for me would be). Then it was out the door to do the afore-mentioned shopping, not to mention shopping for an outfit that would “take it up a notch.”
TUESDAY - Jim approached me to make a welcome sign. Oh, actually, he approached me on Monday I believe, but I did not have any markers, so I got them in time for Tuesday. So on Tuesday I made a sign. It's cute, yet lame. A little snowperson at the top, "Welcome Bob & Tony, Happy Holidays". ANYWAY. The chocolate shop called me to let me know I could pick up by 5 that day, if I wanted. The time: 4:00. So, twenty minutes later, I was on my way to the place, which is 20 minutes away. I made it in time, had a very pleasant exchange, and $416.95 later I walked away with 7 boxes of handmade chocolates. The next shop: the grocery store, for the breakfast spread. An hour and a half after leaving work, I have finally gotten the chocolates, some fruits, cream cheese, butter, milk, half and half, orange juice, and some platters to put them on. What’s next on my agenda? Eating dinner, and taking care of a few household items for about 2 hours total. Then it was time to iron my clothes for the next day. Finally, around 11, I was just about done. Oh wait, time to WRAP THE CHOCOLATES. I think this is stupid, especially since Amy (the proprietor of the store herself) had taken the time to personally tie a very nice cloth ribbon around each box. A ribbon which, I might add, could not simply be slid off, the box be wrapped, and slid back on again. It had to be untied. And could I possibly replicate the lovely bow? Almost, but not quite. About an hour later, I had finally wrapped all seven boxes. Ya, an hour. I finally went to bed just after midnight. Dave, the sweetie that he is, stayed up to keep me company. Ok, by stayed up, I mean slept on the couch in the room while I was wrapping, but I did enjoy his presence. J
WEDNESDAY (today): Woke up at 600. Got up at about 615. Got in the shower. Ran out of hot water 5 minutes into the shower, and wanted to curse at the top of my lungs, but managed to contain myself. Headed out the door at 715, after 3 trips to load my car. I arrived at the grocery store and got a nice spread of fresh pastries. Time of arrival at work: 745. PERFECT! Jim wanted everyone there at 800, to prepare for the 900 meeting. I started unloading my car. As I approached the door with both hands full, someone darted out to open it for me. I thought he was going outside, so our timing was convenient. Nope, he just worked in the office in front of where I parked. Ok, a little sketchy, but very sweet. So I drop off that load, and head back down for the next one. This time someone WAS coming out while I was going in, although that same guy from before had darted into the hallway again to open the door just in case. Last trip, not so much to carry. This time the guy from the first trip opens a door closer to my car (which is usually locked from the outside, so I never use). I had little enough stuff that I could’ve gotten it myself that time, but hey, this guy was being very kind. Somehow he knew which office I worked in, which I didn’t think much of at the time, but now I am a little bothered by that. (In case you are wondering why I am bothered by it, think of it this way: his office is on the first floor. Mine is on the third. Most of the time I don’t see many/any people while I am coming and going in the building. I have NEVER seen him before, to my knowledge…and since I just mentioned how few people I see here in standard passing, I like to think that I recognize the few that I DO see. ANYWAY, back to the story.) I introduce myself to the guy (not what office I work in, just my first name) because it seems the polite thing to do. He introduces himself as Sheldon…
Suddenly things become clear. Greg and Mike, two of the guys I work with, asked me a few weeks ago if Sheldon had made himself known to me yet. I had no clue whom they were talking about, as I had only met one out-of-this-office person, named Efin. Sheldon is a guy that works downstairs, they explained, that is a bit of a liar. They told me that he loved the ladies, and often made it a priority to meet any new ones in the building. He had a thing for Jackie (one of the people I am replacing) and would often strike up conversations with her about this strange diet she was on, claiming he was doing it as well. Yet Greg would bump into him DAILY at Dunkin Donuts, where he would talk about coffee and pastries (both of which restricted from the diet he was supposedly on while talking with Jackie). They went on to explain that when Elaine (the other woman I am replacing) worked here, this guy would walk up two flights of stairs (down the hall on one side of our door) just to walk by our door, wave to Elaine, and take the elevator back down, occasionally stopping in to make small talk “on his way” to his office. You know, the office he went by on the way to get up here.
…Back to the introduction of Sheldon. He introduced himself, and then went on to say that he doesn’t want me to think he was stalking me, it’s just that Jackie, well, he “was like a little brother” to her, and “cared for her deeply.” OOOOOOKKKKKKK, sketchy. Then he said, “…I know you have a boyfriend, but if you ever want to go out and have lunch together, just to get out of the office, come find me.” Ok, he either saw my claddagh ring and inferred my non-single status, or he was using it as a rejection-free date offer. By his assuming I have a boyfriend, I can’t reject him on the grounds of having said boyfriend, as he had implied that it would just be a friendly escape from the office, yet if I did NOT in fact have a boyfriend, then he was in the clear for it to be an actual date if we were to go out….or to ask me out at a later time based on the acquired knowledge of my singularity. Fortunately, I do have a boyfriend, and am not supposed to leave the office for lunch other than just to pick it up and eat in office. So I am in the clear.
After the exchange with Sheldon, I began to unload the breakfast spread and set up the conference room. Pretty much everything was set up. 805, Mike arrives. 815, Greg arrives. 818 or so, Mitchell arrives. 820, one of the consultants (not the investors, whom the meeting was for, but another usually out-of-the-office attendee) arrived. FINALLY, 845, Jim arrives. No mention of the spread, or anything. Asks me if I have coffee ready. Yes. He goes to retrieve some things from his office, and comes out with THREE dirty tea mugs, each complete with several-days-old last two sips of tea and encrusted tea bags in them. “Where should I put these?” What I WANT to say: pour them down your pants. What I DO say: just set them in front of the microwave.
Oh, and by the way, has Jim "taken it up a notch" to look more professional? No. He is wearing the same old khakis he wears every day (run of the mill khakis, not particularly dressy by any means) and a DENIM button down shirt with the logo on it. DENIM. And I bought a new outfit.
I’m pretty ticked at this point, but decide to put out the finishing touches. I start setting out the milk and half and half for the coffee, and bring in the juice and yogurt, for some variety. He is like, “sheesh, it’s starting to look like a feast, put that stuff back in the fridge.” I’m like, not everyone drinks coffee, do you think maybe I should at least leave the juice? Jim: “Well, once everyone is settled, you can come in and just ask if everyone has everything they need, and if anyone wants juice or anything.”
OK. I realize that I am the “administrative assistant.” This means I assist the administrator in whatever he needs. As far as my understanding was, that meant mainly paperwork, some phone calls, filing, financial stuff, keeping office supplies stocked, screening phone calls for him, and other office-y stuff. Soon after starting I was told I would be in charge of watering the plants, and washing the dishes if there were meetings (both tasks a royal pain in the ass since we do not have a sink in the office, nor a bathroom, so I need to trek out to the hallway bathroom and make use of the shallow sink in there). Sometimes Jim would leave his mugs in the kitchen area for me to deal with, sometimes he does them himself. It’s about 50-50. As far as washing his mugs goes. If I am busy doing something, he usually washes them. This morning it became clear to me that to him, administrative assistant has a much longer entry. Here are a few other words he has confused with administrative assistant:
Personal shopper, Gift-wrapper, Elf, Waitress, Delivery person, Personal dishwasher, Slave
I griped to Greg a bit about it, and he confirmed that Jim does seem to have a concept that women come with a certain amount servitude, and that it is really demeaning. I got that vibe from Jackie, but until recently was willing to put certain clues that I have seen aside. Now it turned into a shitpile, all in the span of a few days.
As long as ass-wiper doesn’t get added to the list of unofficial administrative assistant responsibilities, I might be able to last long enough to maintain income while I find a better job.
I thought I'd take the time to leave an update; that way, if anyone were actually able to take a break from his or her hectic life at this point in time, there would be something new here to feast the eyes upon.
First of all, I have enjoyed spending what brief time I have been able to spend with those of you that I have seen since I've moved back to eastern MA. I hope the season is treating you well. Bobby, Melissa, and anyone else involved in seeing the dueling pianos last week....I wanted to go, but I didn't want any part of driving around on the ice slicks, ahem, roads at that point in time. I'm bummed that I missed a good time with you all. Tony, I'm sorry I missed your gig last night. I would really like to see your Barbershop quartet at some point soon, so I hope you have some more performances.
In news: what is happening to the Red Sox? :(
As far as work goes, well....I'm not liking it so much. Some stuff I am not really at liberty to discuss in a public forum. Let's just say that some companies are wealthy, others are less so. That being said, I was not pressing my boss about if he wanted to send out Holiday gifts, as he has in the past. So I have been told, anyway -- and for the record, I had been saving plenty of gift ordering magazines just in case. Which brings us to my next topic: last Wednesday to today, with the focus on this week so far.
Last Wednesday, I got word that we would be having a very important meeting here in the office, with a few people coming in. Jim (my boss) approaches me and is like, next Wednesday we will need to have the office decorated, a nice spread of croissants, bagels, some fruit, and coffee, that kind of stuff. So, I got the pleasure of decorating two large palm tree-esque trees in the conference room with traditional white lights, and those delightful glass shiny ornaments. It looks lovely. The next project was getting other supplies.
MONDAY of this week, I picked up the non-perishables that I would need - namely: plates, napkins, mugs, candy bowl, some hot cocoa mix. Oh, by that I mean Monday AFTER work. DURING work, Jim approached me with another project. Call this company and order 4 large boxes of chocolate and 6 smaller ones. See if you can get them today.
OK. This is a HANDMADE chocolate company. It is 6 days before Christmas, one of the biggest chocolate holidays of the year, next to Valentine's Day. I give it a shot. She says she could get them done by Wednesday morning to pick up at 7:00 (AM), POSSIBLY Tuesday night. That's nice. Later in the day I add a box to the order, per request of my boss. The rest of the day I signed, printed out addresses on envelopes, and printed out address labels for some 40 Holiday cards. By the way, Jim mentioned I should “take it up a notch” in terms of my attire for Wednesday’s meeting (in all fairness, I asked him what the dress-code for me would be). Then it was out the door to do the afore-mentioned shopping, not to mention shopping for an outfit that would “take it up a notch.”
TUESDAY - Jim approached me to make a welcome sign. Oh, actually, he approached me on Monday I believe, but I did not have any markers, so I got them in time for Tuesday. So on Tuesday I made a sign. It's cute, yet lame. A little snowperson at the top, "Welcome Bob & Tony, Happy Holidays". ANYWAY. The chocolate shop called me to let me know I could pick up by 5 that day, if I wanted. The time: 4:00. So, twenty minutes later, I was on my way to the place, which is 20 minutes away. I made it in time, had a very pleasant exchange, and $416.95 later I walked away with 7 boxes of handmade chocolates. The next shop: the grocery store, for the breakfast spread. An hour and a half after leaving work, I have finally gotten the chocolates, some fruits, cream cheese, butter, milk, half and half, orange juice, and some platters to put them on. What’s next on my agenda? Eating dinner, and taking care of a few household items for about 2 hours total. Then it was time to iron my clothes for the next day. Finally, around 11, I was just about done. Oh wait, time to WRAP THE CHOCOLATES. I think this is stupid, especially since Amy (the proprietor of the store herself) had taken the time to personally tie a very nice cloth ribbon around each box. A ribbon which, I might add, could not simply be slid off, the box be wrapped, and slid back on again. It had to be untied. And could I possibly replicate the lovely bow? Almost, but not quite. About an hour later, I had finally wrapped all seven boxes. Ya, an hour. I finally went to bed just after midnight. Dave, the sweetie that he is, stayed up to keep me company. Ok, by stayed up, I mean slept on the couch in the room while I was wrapping, but I did enjoy his presence. J
WEDNESDAY (today): Woke up at 600. Got up at about 615. Got in the shower. Ran out of hot water 5 minutes into the shower, and wanted to curse at the top of my lungs, but managed to contain myself. Headed out the door at 715, after 3 trips to load my car. I arrived at the grocery store and got a nice spread of fresh pastries. Time of arrival at work: 745. PERFECT! Jim wanted everyone there at 800, to prepare for the 900 meeting. I started unloading my car. As I approached the door with both hands full, someone darted out to open it for me. I thought he was going outside, so our timing was convenient. Nope, he just worked in the office in front of where I parked. Ok, a little sketchy, but very sweet. So I drop off that load, and head back down for the next one. This time someone WAS coming out while I was going in, although that same guy from before had darted into the hallway again to open the door just in case. Last trip, not so much to carry. This time the guy from the first trip opens a door closer to my car (which is usually locked from the outside, so I never use). I had little enough stuff that I could’ve gotten it myself that time, but hey, this guy was being very kind. Somehow he knew which office I worked in, which I didn’t think much of at the time, but now I am a little bothered by that. (In case you are wondering why I am bothered by it, think of it this way: his office is on the first floor. Mine is on the third. Most of the time I don’t see many/any people while I am coming and going in the building. I have NEVER seen him before, to my knowledge…and since I just mentioned how few people I see here in standard passing, I like to think that I recognize the few that I DO see. ANYWAY, back to the story.) I introduce myself to the guy (not what office I work in, just my first name) because it seems the polite thing to do. He introduces himself as Sheldon…
Suddenly things become clear. Greg and Mike, two of the guys I work with, asked me a few weeks ago if Sheldon had made himself known to me yet. I had no clue whom they were talking about, as I had only met one out-of-this-office person, named Efin. Sheldon is a guy that works downstairs, they explained, that is a bit of a liar. They told me that he loved the ladies, and often made it a priority to meet any new ones in the building. He had a thing for Jackie (one of the people I am replacing) and would often strike up conversations with her about this strange diet she was on, claiming he was doing it as well. Yet Greg would bump into him DAILY at Dunkin Donuts, where he would talk about coffee and pastries (both of which restricted from the diet he was supposedly on while talking with Jackie). They went on to explain that when Elaine (the other woman I am replacing) worked here, this guy would walk up two flights of stairs (down the hall on one side of our door) just to walk by our door, wave to Elaine, and take the elevator back down, occasionally stopping in to make small talk “on his way” to his office. You know, the office he went by on the way to get up here.
…Back to the introduction of Sheldon. He introduced himself, and then went on to say that he doesn’t want me to think he was stalking me, it’s just that Jackie, well, he “was like a little brother” to her, and “cared for her deeply.” OOOOOOKKKKKKK, sketchy. Then he said, “…I know you have a boyfriend, but if you ever want to go out and have lunch together, just to get out of the office, come find me.” Ok, he either saw my claddagh ring and inferred my non-single status, or he was using it as a rejection-free date offer. By his assuming I have a boyfriend, I can’t reject him on the grounds of having said boyfriend, as he had implied that it would just be a friendly escape from the office, yet if I did NOT in fact have a boyfriend, then he was in the clear for it to be an actual date if we were to go out….or to ask me out at a later time based on the acquired knowledge of my singularity. Fortunately, I do have a boyfriend, and am not supposed to leave the office for lunch other than just to pick it up and eat in office. So I am in the clear.
After the exchange with Sheldon, I began to unload the breakfast spread and set up the conference room. Pretty much everything was set up. 805, Mike arrives. 815, Greg arrives. 818 or so, Mitchell arrives. 820, one of the consultants (not the investors, whom the meeting was for, but another usually out-of-the-office attendee) arrived. FINALLY, 845, Jim arrives. No mention of the spread, or anything. Asks me if I have coffee ready. Yes. He goes to retrieve some things from his office, and comes out with THREE dirty tea mugs, each complete with several-days-old last two sips of tea and encrusted tea bags in them. “Where should I put these?” What I WANT to say: pour them down your pants. What I DO say: just set them in front of the microwave.
Oh, and by the way, has Jim "taken it up a notch" to look more professional? No. He is wearing the same old khakis he wears every day (run of the mill khakis, not particularly dressy by any means) and a DENIM button down shirt with the logo on it. DENIM. And I bought a new outfit.
I’m pretty ticked at this point, but decide to put out the finishing touches. I start setting out the milk and half and half for the coffee, and bring in the juice and yogurt, for some variety. He is like, “sheesh, it’s starting to look like a feast, put that stuff back in the fridge.” I’m like, not everyone drinks coffee, do you think maybe I should at least leave the juice? Jim: “Well, once everyone is settled, you can come in and just ask if everyone has everything they need, and if anyone wants juice or anything.”
OK. I realize that I am the “administrative assistant.” This means I assist the administrator in whatever he needs. As far as my understanding was, that meant mainly paperwork, some phone calls, filing, financial stuff, keeping office supplies stocked, screening phone calls for him, and other office-y stuff. Soon after starting I was told I would be in charge of watering the plants, and washing the dishes if there were meetings (both tasks a royal pain in the ass since we do not have a sink in the office, nor a bathroom, so I need to trek out to the hallway bathroom and make use of the shallow sink in there). Sometimes Jim would leave his mugs in the kitchen area for me to deal with, sometimes he does them himself. It’s about 50-50. As far as washing his mugs goes. If I am busy doing something, he usually washes them. This morning it became clear to me that to him, administrative assistant has a much longer entry. Here are a few other words he has confused with administrative assistant:
Personal shopper, Gift-wrapper, Elf, Waitress, Delivery person, Personal dishwasher, Slave
I griped to Greg a bit about it, and he confirmed that Jim does seem to have a concept that women come with a certain amount servitude, and that it is really demeaning. I got that vibe from Jackie, but until recently was willing to put certain clues that I have seen aside. Now it turned into a shitpile, all in the span of a few days.
As long as ass-wiper doesn’t get added to the list of unofficial administrative assistant responsibilities, I might be able to last long enough to maintain income while I find a better job.